How do I deal with shame and guilt?
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30-07-2012, 11:40 AM
RE: How do I deal with shame and guilt?
(30-07-2012 11:09 AM)morondog Wrote:  
(30-07-2012 10:56 AM)kineo Wrote:  Not only that but the things you've been taught about the shame involved in sex and your body are probably almost entirely wrong.

^^ Now that I think about it, *this* particular aspect of Christianity has fucked me on so many levels it's not even funny Confused

So true. It's taken years to get past.

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30-07-2012, 12:32 PM
RE: How do I deal with shame and guilt?
MNeufs,

I think you said in your PM that you used to turn to Jesus to relieve shame and guilt. Apparently it used to work, even though there was no "Jesus" listening to you or doing anything. Would it still work? Maybe just try it. It's no different than other mental techniques such as positive thinking or visualizing positive outcomes. Maybe it will still work. Did you used to go to confession? Maybe that will still work. There's nothing that requires atheists to give up on habits/practices of the past if they still work, even if you now have a better understanding why.
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30-07-2012, 01:39 PM
RE: How do I deal with shame and guilt?
The only problem with that approach is the little niggling monster in the back of your mind going "it's all faaaaake,it's all stoooooooopid" which is why although I used to derive some peace from the act of mentally stroking myself nowadays it would feel like scraping my exposed brain with sandpaper.
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30-07-2012, 01:59 PM
RE: How do I deal with shame and guilt?
(30-07-2012 01:39 PM)morondog Wrote:  The only problem with that approach is the little niggling monster in the back of your mind going "it's all faaaaake,it's all stoooooooopid" which is why although I used to derive some peace from the act of mentally stroking myself nowadays it would feel like scraping my exposed brain with sandpaper.

Yes, and since MNeufs is only just recently recovering his sanity from religion, it's best not to confuse the issue. Step cleanly away from the irresponsibility of Theism.

As a new Atheist, you get to experience the full enjoyment of life. This is your life!

Pain heals. Chicks dig scars. Glory... lasts forever! Thumbsup

Now, get out there and screw it up like a man. Dodgy

I think in the end, I just feel like I'm a secular person who has a skeptical eye toward any extraordinary claim, carefully examining any extraordinary evidence before jumping to conclusions. ~ Eric ~ My friend ... who figured it out.
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30-07-2012, 03:07 PM
RE: How do I deal with shame and guilt?
Praying to something you know isn't there may not work. But the only reason prayer gives you peace is a physical one - it releases Endorphins.

Quote:Endorphins ("endogenous morphine") are endogenous opioid peptides that function as neurotransmitters. They are produced by the pituitary gland and the hypothalamus in vertebrates during exercise, excitement, pain, consumption of spicy food, love and orgasm, and they resemble the opiates in their abilities to produce analgesia and a feeling of well-being.

So, you can get the same effect during exercise, excitement, pain, consumption of spicy food, love and orgasm.

You can also get similar effects from sitting alone on the beach and staring at the ocean or similar, meditation or solitary nature walks.

Lots of ways to get this relief. And don't forget laughter - got any movies/shows that make you laugh?

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30-07-2012, 03:19 PM
RE: How do I deal with shame and guilt?
(30-07-2012 08:44 AM)kim Wrote:  Davy Jones? Thought you just died, man?
Shit ... we all used to have such a crush on you. Wink

Well, not all of us.No

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30-07-2012, 04:20 PM
RE: How do I deal with shame and guilt?
(30-07-2012 11:40 AM)kineo Wrote:  
(30-07-2012 11:09 AM)morondog Wrote:  ^^ Now that I think about it, *this* particular aspect of Christianity has fucked me on so many levels it's not even funny Confused

So true. It's taken years to get past.

Ooooh! Yeah! Ouch!

Who can identify with the sharp shock of panic induced by the sudden rememberance that your dead relatives might be watching you do something "sinful".

Freed-thinkers can laugh at this now.

And anyway, would your grandma really be into grandchild-porn?

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30-07-2012, 04:31 PM
RE: How do I deal with shame and guilt?
Never been bothered by that. Figured my ancestors had much better things to do... turns out decomposing is a full time occupation. It was more the constant negative press all aspects of sex receive. Masturbation, a bit of groping, homosexuality... all these were seen as shameful in the extreme. And teenage boys being what they are, you ended up with this weird society where everyone was wanking furiously, trying desperately to keep it a secret, judging every other guy and piling on the guilt and public humiliation at any sign of weakness. Did I mention I went to an all guys school. It was fucking hormonal dude.
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30-07-2012, 04:49 PM
RE: How do I deal with shame and guilt?
(30-07-2012 03:19 PM)Chas Wrote:  
(30-07-2012 08:44 AM)kim Wrote:  Davy Jones? Thought you just died, man?
Shit ... we all used to have such a crush on you. Wink

Well, not all of us.No

True. Mickey was my favorite.

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
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30-07-2012, 05:12 PM
RE: How do I deal with shame and guilt?
(30-07-2012 04:49 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  
(30-07-2012 03:19 PM)Chas Wrote:  Well, not all of us.No

True. Mickey was my favorite.

Yea - I was more into Mickey, as well. But then, I think we all thought Davy was at least doable. Shy

I think in the end, I just feel like I'm a secular person who has a skeptical eye toward any extraordinary claim, carefully examining any extraordinary evidence before jumping to conclusions. ~ Eric ~ My friend ... who figured it out.
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