How to deal with my friend's really religious mother?
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16-04-2017, 04:20 PM
RE: How to deal with my friend's really religious mother?
There's a lot to sift through in all of these replies, so I'm just going to reply in a more general way and cover what I can through my understanding and perspective of what I've read.

But, firstly, thank you all for taking the time to reply, it is very much appreciated.

I hadn't actually gone to my friend's house, we had met at the library and then gone to Starbucks because the library was closing early. Her mom had come there to pick her up, she had also brought her other son who I go to school with and have formed a small friendship with as well.

Since we were in a public place, and my friend relies on her mother in order to take her places, I didn't want to risk starting anything that would make it so my friend could no longer go anywhere to see me.

I also was raised with the "Golden Rule" as it often referred to as. I didn't want to give my friend's mother any reason to disrespect me. My father was also there and tries his harder never to discuss religion with anyone, so I didn't want to put him in an even more uncomfortable situation.

I just don't know how to deal with things if I'm going to see my friend's mother every time she gets picked up, or on the off chance that I do one day get invited to her home.

I fear that if she continues this type of talk I might not be able to keep my mouth shut, because while I do try to avoid conflict when I can I am a very passionate and opinionated person myself. People saying things like they will pray for me because of all of my health issues has made me incredibly uncomfortable and very annoyed. Especially since I had my most recent operation.

If I do get to the point where I cannot keep my mouth shut any longer I might not convey what I am trying to say in a very approachable manner. The hostility that I may give off might just reaffirm whatever misconceptions she might already have regarding atheists. That's the last thing I want to do.

It's alright to laugh at me, I've been laughing at myself for years.
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16-04-2017, 04:31 PM
RE: How to deal with my friend's really religious mother?
ScarletStormBreaker Wrote:Does anyone have any advice for me?
Yes, I do.
It is the right thing to tell the truth about your convictions.
It is also the right thing to be a peacemaker and to have good relationship(friendship) with people.

Sometimes we find ourselves in the situation when it is not possible to make both right choices at the same time.
You are in the situation where you probably can not have friendship if you honestly share your convictions.
So, this is when you have to make priority - what is more important for me: friendship, good relationships or to make my convictions known?
If friendship is more important to you then don't share your convictions.

English is my second language.
I AM DEPLORABLE AND IRREDEEMABLE
SHE PERSISTED WE RESISTED
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16-04-2017, 09:41 PM
RE: How to deal with my friend's really religious mother?
Deprive her of rain until her crops wither and die.

Don't let those gnomes and their illusions get you down. They're just gnomes and illusions.

--Jake the Dog, Adventure Time

Alouette, je te plumerai.
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16-04-2017, 10:19 PM
RE: How to deal with my friend's really religious mother?
(16-04-2017 09:41 PM)Old Man Marsh Wrote:  Deprive her of rain until her crops wither and die.

You made me laugh. Thank you!

It's alright to laugh at me, I've been laughing at myself for years.
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16-04-2017, 11:37 PM
RE: How to deal with my friend's really religious mother?
Just replying to the OP here....

I suggest having an open talk with your friend about this. Not with a message of "you need to talk to her" or "you need to fix her" or "she's awful", but "I'm not comfortable around her, can we hang out somewhere else?" It sounds like your friend will understand (but go with your own gut-check on that). That'll solve most of the exposure issues you're facing without a grand and potentially messy confrontation.

"If I ignore the alternatives, the only option is God; I ignore them; therefore God." -- The Syllogism of Fail
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