How to help my mother
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08-07-2012, 10:22 AM
RE: How to help my mother
(08-07-2012 10:20 AM)Leela Wrote:  Is it not weird to do that?


Is what weird? Paypal donations? There are thousands of donation drives going on at any time for anything you can think of.

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08-07-2012, 11:11 AM
RE: How to help my mother
If we can get a phone for you then maybe Leela you can give it to her under the pretext that it is a vital thing to have in case anything happens to her husband.... that it is only logical that she possess such a thing and that it got donated by a friend who had got a newer/better phone..... so there is no money involved.

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08-07-2012, 01:40 PM
RE: How to help my mother
I am not sure if she has a phone now or not, because she gave me some mobile number. maybe she got someone's phone? No idea.

I meant weird to take donations for my mom. I have never asked anyone to do something like that, now you guys are offering it. Feels weird for me.

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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09-07-2012, 12:08 PM
RE: How to help my mother
Update:
(I think you deserve to be updated as you offered so much help)

I found a way to call. So the phone number she gave me, it is a mobile number, is hers, she just has no credit on it. I can call from work after work is over every now and then. I did that today.
My mom told me that today she went to see her therapist because she thought she is going insane.
She told me that she visits her friends every now and then. Not my brother so much though, because she hates how dirty his place is.
She is barely sleeping, and if so, not in the bed but on the sofa. She said she can't bare to sleep in the bed alone. She pretty much stopped eating and lost 6kilo last week. Which is bad as she is diabetic and has to watch her sugar levels. She said one nicht her sugar level was at 50, she woke up with cold sweat and sick and remembered that she hadn't eaten.
She said she stopped crying day and night.
She told me that one day she was almost collapsing when she was at the hospital for a visit, the doctor brought her something to drink so she wouldn't.
She says she is holding his hand and caressing him and talking to him and she is singing him his birthday song from last year because he was so moved by it. She does it because she hopes that some of it gets through to it.
She told me that they removed his skull bone... like up on top I mean. They are keeping the bone in case he wakes up once they let him get out of coma. They had to remove the bone and close the head with only the skin because his brain is so swollen. The atery that gives blood and oxygen to the left side of the brain stopped working so most of that part is dead by now.
He got a bad pneumonia and it got worse. His breathing got worse too. Right now he is on opiats (? right word ?) because normal pain killers would not be enough right now.
They say they wanna try get him out of the coma once the pneumonia is gone. But they don't know if he will be able to wake up at that point. They say that if he can wake up he will have lost speech and the ability to speak. He will be paralized, with lots of luck only his right side. The doctor told her that if he would only see his MRI scans and he would not know that he (the bf) was perfectly healthy and very intelligent before this happened, he would not have a lot of hope for him.

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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09-07-2012, 10:59 PM
RE: How to help my mother
Shit, doesn't sound all that good... I hope something will turn out for the better.

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10-07-2012, 12:34 AM
RE: How to help my mother
So he may have some damage to the left hemisphere and the danger right now is the pneumonia. Good thing they have him in coma -it's best for the brain at this point, too- don't want to risk further possible damage.

It's good you are able to call your Mom - I know that had to help her tremendously. I would stress to her that she needs to eat -at all costs- she can't afford to lose weight like that. Tell her she has to keep up her strength and remind her that she is no good to her boyfriend if she's not healthy. Sorry - I have to say this stuff - I'm a health freak. Shy

Heart You take care too Leela - this can be a stressful time for you, as well.
I would tell you the same thing your Mom needs to know; you are no good to yourself or anyone if you aren't healthy. Thumbsup

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10-07-2012, 03:07 AM
RE: How to help my mother
As my mother told me on the phone that she actually has a facebook account I added her and couldn't resist looking for other family members (out of curiosity, not because I am going to add them), I found my brother and wrote to him. He told me that he is having an eye on her, he sees her a few times per week right now.

@kim, thanks, I am taking care of myself. I am not going to starve anyway as I like food too much. But I did restart smoking which I will stop again.

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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12-07-2012, 03:17 AM
RE: How to help my mother
Yesterday I had a chat with my mother and brother via facebook, she was at his house.
She told me that her bf has now also water in his lungs and receives a medicine to get the water out before they do the cut (the one for the breathing hole... forgot the word, sorry).

Also, once my mother is ok again, I will reinforce my separation from the rest of my family, because they are idiots. This became clear to me when I exchanged a few words with my brother.

But as far as I know my mother restarted eating (at least a bit)

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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12-07-2012, 06:24 AM
RE: How to help my mother
You just ignore the stupid things, do not let them drag you back to arguing over stupid things. Just ignore and do not reply.

Tracheotomy is the word for the hole in the throat.

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12-07-2012, 08:08 AM
RE: How to help my mother
Thanks Filox (for both parts of the comment)!

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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