How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
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18-05-2016, 12:34 PM (This post was last modified: 18-05-2016 12:39 PM by Leerob.)
How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
I would assume that I am not the only person who has been doing completely shitty jobs and got stuck in a path that is difficult to leave (professionally). And I am surely also not the only person with some kind of disorder that makes shitty jobs an even harder challenge. So I decided to share with you, my way to deal with it.

I started working in customer service jobs about 6 years ago and generally I don't mind doing these jobs. I think many people are like that. The job itself isn't really bothering you even if it is maybe boring or repetitive or even annoying...

Usually it is everything surrounding the job, that gets on our nerves to a degree where we just want to throw the towel and leave.
* Managers who micro manage
* 30 useless emails a day but you gotta read them all just in case
* Procedures changing to worse all the time
* No windows
* Not getting PTO when you need it
* Fake smiles
* Bad canteens
* Stuff breaking and not getting fixed
* long trip to and from work
* bad pay
* feedback not beeing heard
etc etc
Anything familiar?

Well I have recently restarted in a job I was kinda ok with. And between leaving there and restarting there (for 7 months) I was working in the customer care department for a Software company. It was complete hell. All the points above and more applied. The work itself was fine. Everything else was shit.
It got me down so low that at some point I got panic attacks all the time and was depressed to a degree where my Mr. urged me to find something else. I have bpd so those were bad signs and I did not want to fall back into my worst place of course.
So as a first step to relax in that hell of a work place I invented the "fuck it" method (let's just call it that).
Usually I work above target because that is just what I pride myself in when it comes to work. Perfect quality and always above target.
At this job I learnt to not give a fuck.

How to not give a fuck and explanations:

Make sure to start your day as relaxed as you possibly can:
Come 5 minutes early to get your work station ready. Make sure you have a little buffer to get a tea or coffee. Have something uplifting at your workstation (print out a Picard Facepalm). Bring something from home (a photo of your kids / a coffe mug you like / your favourite pen / ...).

Make sure your day also ends as relaxed as possible:
You need to leave work at work so you can charge your batteries at home so practice to say "no" when asked for overtime. Leave work when your shift is over. Make sure you finish your main task 20-30 minutes before the end of your shift so you can still answer an email or set up whatever needs to be ready for the next person, etc... If you leave on time but your brain does the the circular thinking thing about whatever you might have forgotten to do at work, always remember that it really doesn't matter. None of your co-workers does it much better and if they do, they won't usually even hear a "thanks". So really, don't sweat it.

Be familiar with all your policies and systems:
I personally find bugs in the system and loopholes in policies very quickly. I will then procede to use those to my advantage because usually you can give the feedback and nothing will be fixed anyway. So it is their own fault if people use those Wink Just make sure that your company doesn't have one of those "non gaming" policies because in that case it might get you fired. And again, why? Because you can always say "oh sorry, I wasn't aware.... " and then never do it again. But until then... *shrug*
And even if there are no bugs or loopholes, it will still help you to do your job quick and well so no one can complain about the quality or amount of work you do.

Work exactly on target and not one move more.
Unless you are planning to climb the career ladder in that company, work your target and that is it. You usually don't get compensation for overperforming (sales excluded) and in most scenarios no one will even say "thanks". Therefore fuck it. Do what you are paid to do and realx. This comes with slowing down. If you are a perfectionist like me, you pride yourself to work on perfect quality and overperformance. Just stop. Don't do it unless it helps your career.

If you work an office job / sit a lot:
Get up once per hour for 5 minutes. If you have systems in place where you need to log every time you leave your desk, then log a toilet break / smoking break / getting a drink / etc. It is very unhealthy for body and mind to sit all day. Make sure to walk a few steps and look at things other than a computer or phone screen.

Have something uplifting at your work station / desk:
Print out a funny picture or a quote you like. Bring a photo of your children. Have a stress ball. Have anything that can help you feel better by touching it or looking at it. If you are allowed to listen to music during work, bring some on your phone.

Stress relief:
Have something to drink and a healthy snack! If you are hungry or thirsty, you get stressed easier. Have some nuts or fruit and a bottle of water or something like that. Also have some chewing gum and when you get anxious, start chewing. When you chew things, your brain gets tricked that "everything is fine because I am eating". Have a stress ball (yes again) because sometimes we need to release some frustration and a stress ball is the easiest thing you can have at your desk to use during or after a situation. During your breaks, do something unrelated to work. Play a game on your phone, call your partner, read a book, take a walk, etc... If you are the type that needs to move a lot, get one of those big gym balls to sit on instead of a chair. They are good for your back and you can move your ass without bothering anyone.

When someone is an asshole to you:
During the situation, put your hands in your pockets and inside the pocket show them the middle finger. Only do that if you know that the shape of your hand cannot be seen from outside your pocket. Maybe speak to a trusted coworker (outside of work), a friend, your partner - just to vent it out, do not shut up and have it build up inside of you. If it is really bad speak to your manager / HR.
Bring to your mind how miserable someone has to be in order to behave badly towards other people, they should be pitied.

Difficult managers:
There are just managers that are difficult to deal with. So if they tend to not listen, make sure to ask for a 1to1 meeting. In your 1to1 address the things and do not give in until you receive an answer that shows you that they listened. During meetings with difficult managers, listen well, come prepared, know your shit.
If your manager tends to point out negatives all the time but never says "thank you", easy: Well I hit my target, right? Did someone complain? Was the complaint about me or the product? To do a better job, this and that needs to be fixed because otherwise I cannot perform. Really always come prepared, have answers, and again > know your shit. Do not get intimidated, even if that costs you extra energy. After the meeting and once you calmed down, you will feel very empowered.
Just always stay on topic, stay calm, do not let them change the topic. You have a clear question, ask it until you get a clear answer.

Find a new job:
Save up your PTO for interviews. In interviews use the negatives of your current job as positives in the interview and call them "learning opportunity" or "a challenge I mastered" or "a problem I overcame" or "a task I completed".... Be creative but use everything that is shit at your current job as something useful in your interviews. Make sure to polish your CV and write a separate cover letter for each job you apply for.
Research the company you apply for to see how others, who work there, feel about it. I personally go on glassdoor.com for that because people can write a review anonymously so they tend to be very honest. (beware, some companies with bad reviews will have tons of people write very short but super positive reviews. So be on the lookout for that) Check the negative reviews for a job and ask yourself if you think this is something you can deal with.
NEVER talk badly about your previous job or managers during an interview or to anybody in a position of power! It looks bad and who knows when you will see those people again.

So basically all of this sums up to a nice, round, big "fuck it" and move on Big Grin

So yea, thought I'd share that.
I hope it helps.
For my current job, that I came back to, it helps me to not stress. Everytime I get close to stressing, I have a big "oh fuck it" in my mind Smile

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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18-05-2016, 12:43 PM (This post was last modified: 18-05-2016 01:10 PM by KUSA.)
How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
Fuck it works good. I learned this years ago out of necessity. It is a great survival skill.
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18-05-2016, 01:06 PM
RE: How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
Been working on this method since being just short of a burnout (which my colleage suffered who was justa bit adhead of me it seems).

Fuck it is like science, it works bitchez!

Ceterum censeo, religionem delendam esse
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18-05-2016, 01:16 PM
RE: How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
Earmuffs needs to read this. Laugh out load

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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18-05-2016, 01:27 PM
RE: How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
"Ah...... Mr Wilson. So you've finally reached 'Fuck-it'."

Big Grin
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18-05-2016, 02:09 PM
RE: How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
Make it 400-450 emails a day, and it starts to sound a little familiar...

Then at the end of the week, my even my pay check calls it "gross" pay
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18-05-2016, 02:29 PM
RE: How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
There is no such thing as a "shitty job". You not liking the one you might have only means you personally don't like it. There are only lack of livable wages. Most people end up in jobs just to pay their bills. Not everyone will end up with their dream job. And the right wing bullshit "starter job" is a fucking myth. Who is doing the work when the teens and college students are in class?

"Shitty" is having a fucking jaded attitude that those who have less money are worth less than you. A pay gap of some sort is needed in a three class society, but the one we have now us unsustainable. Every job is needed. And every position that requires human labor is worthy of having a livable wage and a life outside work. An economically stable society benefits everyone, including the rich...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q2gO4DKVpa8

Poetry by Brian37(poems by an atheist) Also on Facebook as BrianJames Rational Poet and Twitter Brianrrs37
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18-05-2016, 03:03 PM
RE: How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
I've been doing customer care for a long time and it was causing a lot of stress. I never do more than I have to and I no longer let shit bother me. Although it's not possible for everybody, the best thing I did was go part time. I have less money but I don't give a fuck. Life's too short. Luckily enough my wife has a good job and likes my cooking. I also get the chance to spend more time with my daughter.

“The first duty of a man is to think for himself” ― José Martí
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18-05-2016, 03:55 PM
RE: How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
Brian: These things: "dream job", "starter job", "not liking the job", "having an attitude" or "pay gaps" are not in my post. I was very clear on what I define as a shitty job and none of the things you mentioned were part of it.

This is about having the "tools", especially when you are not mentally healthy, to deal with a very bad and toxic work environment.
I will quote myself:
Quote:The job itself isn't really bothering you even if it is maybe boring or repetitive or even annoying...
Usually it is everything surrounding the job, that gets on our nerves to a degree where we just want to throw the towel and leave.
A mentally healthy person will likely have this attitude towards such a work environment already or will develop other security guards that prevent them from going crazy. Mentally unhealthy people often do not have this protection mechanism and they need to learn to protect themselves.
I had to learn it the hard way, and so I felt that sharing this will be beneficial to other people in similar situation.

I hope this is now clear enough and we can maybe move away from the agression.

Let's relax, it's late in the evening. Everything is fine. This is a place to help each other Smile

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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18-05-2016, 04:02 PM
RE: How to relax in bad jobs (the "fuck it" principle)
(18-05-2016 03:03 PM)Marozz Wrote:  I've been doing customer care for a long time and it was causing a lot of stress. I never do more than I have to and I no longer let shit bother me. Although it's not possible for everybody, the best thing I did was go part time. I have less money but I don't give a fuck. Life's too short. Luckily enough my wife has a good job and likes my cooking. I also get the chance to spend more time with my daughter.

And let me guess. It wasn't the customers or anything directly related to them, that was causing the stress.

Sadly I cannot afford to go part time but at least my husband sees the difference in my attitude.
It changed from a panick attack each morning and evening to happily cycling to work and coming home with enough energy to work on my youtube videos.

So at least for me the whole "fuck it" works really well Smile
btw I do my job and I do it very well. I just will not take a million extra tasks or offer to help out again as it causes enormous stress without any benefit for myself or my career. Still doing what I am told though, actually was just recently assigned a very interesting project as my current team leader knows me and the things I like to work on well.

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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