How to tell my friend i'm Bisexual
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24-08-2015, 09:04 AM
RE: How to tell my friend i'm Bisexual
(23-08-2015 11:25 PM)Smercury44 Wrote:  It sounds like deep down you know you can't trust this friend with personal information. I'd listen to that instinct. I wouldn't say anything, but I'm not you. If you need to come out to be happier, seek support from a site like Aliza linked above. Good luck to you Hug

Or just PM you, Smerc. You're a good shrink.

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24-08-2015, 09:05 AM
RE: How to tell my friend i'm Bisexual
Maybe you want to tell her not only to get it off your chest and be honest with her, but also to possibly put in motion a chain of events beyond your control that might culminate with you being forced to come out to your parents and the world at large?
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27-08-2015, 09:52 PM
RE: How to tell my friend i'm Bisexual
What's the urgency? No rush you have your whole life ahead of you. Best of all you are true to yourself that's the most important thing. You will know when the time is right don't do anything that might jeopardize your education, your career, and your future. Look I'm at least 40 years older than you and It took my sorry ass all this time to come out as an Atheist to my family.

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." -Albert Einstein
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27-08-2015, 09:59 PM
RE: How to tell my friend i'm Bisexual
(23-08-2015 08:31 PM)ForsakenHeretic Wrote:  Hey everybody I need some advice. As some of you might know I live in the south, more specifically Alabama. I going to come out of closet to one of my friends about my Bisexuality. But this has some serious potential to backfire.

The person I'm coming out would probably accept me for who I am. But I can't let my parents know yet they would kick me out or disown me at the most, and treat me like crap at the least. I'm going to tell her not to my family and not my other friends. But I just have this feeling she's going to tell somebody and they will tell my parents. And if that happens then I'm screwed. That's not even counting the social stigma I would get, Alabama is FILLED with rednecks, hillbilly's and religious retards I'd be shunned by so many people.

I know she probably wouldn't tell anybody but I have this feeling she will. It honestly is scaring me a little. Maybe I shouldn't tell her. But I need to tell somebody SOOOOO bad it's tearing me up inside. She already knows I'm an atheist and she accepted me for that. But than again she seems like she didn't grow up extremely religious like I did. I just want to hear you guys advice on this. If I should come out to her or not. Maybe you guys can share a coming story to your friends and how they reacted. Please any advice is great. I know this may sound silly and stupid to make a thread about, but seriously me staying in my parents house i'm 15 i'm not old enough for a full time job my entire life might depend on this choice.

Keep it to yourself for now. Tell someone else, or tell a counsellor.

On a lighter note, I heard today there's a sign at the entrance to a town in Alabama "If you can read this, you're not from here". Tongue

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27-08-2015, 10:38 PM
RE: How to tell my friend i'm Bisexual
ALWAYS trust your gut. And for the record, it usually whispers but loud enough for you to hear it. Trust that voice, its telling you that this girl wont keep it quiet.


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10-09-2015, 07:35 AM
RE: How to tell my friend i'm Bisexual
Friendships fall apart. If there's any hostility, jealousy, etc then guess who'll blab your sexuality all over the place. Not worth it.
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10-09-2015, 02:26 PM
RE: How to tell my friend i'm Bisexual
I would suggest keeping it online on forums like this until you're 18 and out of your parents' grasp. Unless you feel you can really trust this friend, friends grow apart sometimes.

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10-09-2015, 03:56 PM
RE: How to tell my friend i'm Bisexual
(23-08-2015 08:31 PM)ForsakenHeretic Wrote:  Hey everybody I need some advice. As some of you might know I live in the south, more specifically Alabama. I going to come out of closet to one of my friends about my Bisexuality. But this has some serious potential to backfire.
I'm not gay or bisexual, so haven't experienced "coming out" myself.
However I have discovered a few acquaintances to be gay.

Obviously South USA is a beast unto its own and has "special" needs/concerns etc.

For what it is worth, I don't think anyone needs to "come out" depending on what is meant by "come out" of course.
But I would find it odd if a friend or acquaintance tells me that they are gay or bisexual. It's not something I need to know, they certainly don't need my approval or "support".
If however they talk about their boyfriend/girlfriend or bring them to a party and I can see that this is a relationship rather than a mere friend then I will know. It's not very exciting knowledge, but it's knowledge all the same. I think this is the "natural" way to do it. I don't think it needs to be a big deal or a "coming out" per se.
(psst, I don't generally label people gay/straight/bi, their sexual orientation is none of my concern).

But I do understand that many gay and bi people can get persecuted by some people (particularly religious folk) who are judgmental and rigid regarding their ideas on how others ought to behave. To deal with the reactions of other douchbags in society, I'd definitely provide support.

If you are worried that your friend might pull away then that is unfortunate and sad. Your friend is probably brainwashed by religion and the society of the Deep south of USA. You need to have friends who will accept you for who you are. If they can't then they are not really friends.
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