I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
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02-10-2013, 12:30 PM
RE: I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
(01-10-2013 03:10 PM)ridethespiral Wrote:  
(01-10-2013 01:49 PM)PleaseJesus Wrote:  How dare you, sir? I experienced a great deal of pain and rejection when I came out as a Cratheist (cratheist) to my friends and family. Therefore, and in the spirit (Spirit) of Cratheist Week on the Travel Channel, I hereby denounce all who will not uphold the sacred and imperishable proclamation of our Archdeacon Photon Skeptic Yahushuah, as he itself has been widely regarded by our sacred documents to have hypothetically stated:

"Know then that all that you know is not enough to know all that you know."
-- Mentat musings from Arrakis (Dune), Book IX

I further applaud your Religulousity and suggest a Dianetic Enema deep cleanse to open your freethinking chakra centers of immortal power.

Thank you, PJ Poobah

You read the Dune Series?

Lol which mod are you and what have you done with PJ?

The Frank Herbert six, the two continuation novels, Paul of Dune and I just finished The Winds of Dune. I have the David Lynch director's cut and the two SyFy series at home, too. Dune is now required reading for all Cratheists, what with its complete and total spiritual nature and the fact that all of its important religious traditions are also conspiratorial plants from those seeking to control the masses.

I'm Chas, back moderating again. I killed PJ and replaced him with a human being. PJ was a real !@#%, wasn't he? Good riddance.
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02-10-2013, 12:40 PM
RE: I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
(02-10-2013 11:05 AM)Dark Light Wrote:  
(02-10-2013 10:57 AM)KidCharlemagne1962 Wrote:  How many can there be? Weeping

Egor+Please Jesus+Y=Egor, so somewhere between 2 and ≈ 7.0 x 10^9 if we assume that all Egors are humans and living on planet Earth. I'm not so sure we should make such dangerous assumptions though. And by that, I mean that both of them are from planet Earth.

I think the more correct equation would be :
PJ + Y -> Egor, only for very large values of PJ.

Insufferable know-it-all.Einstein God has a plan for us. Please stop fucking it up with your prayers.
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02-10-2013, 12:41 PM
RE: I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
(01-10-2013 07:32 PM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  Obviously PJ didn't write that.
Remember the little business about the retarded kid/brother he plagiarized ?
SO many reasons to think he copied it from somewhere.
Nothing about it even resembles his writing style, or ANYTHING he's ever said here.

Come on PleasePleaseLetThereBeAJebus.
Fess up.
You have 24 hours to turn yourself in.

The Jebus Police
Tongue

My children:

Cratheism is my own moniker. "Christinsanity" and "Atheology" were already trademarked by another cultist, I mean, messiah, I mean, sacerdotal sicko.

Stand fast in your (lack of) faith and remember our battle hymn (our peaceful ode):

When northern skies are dark-ning,
And all our hope has failed,
Toward our mighty wanderlust,
Epically we'll bail.

Should we see our God (god) on that judgment day,
We'll be sure to tell Him (it) she's judgmental all the way,
Ever march the Cratheists, ever sure their call,
With some lucky lawyers we'll be 501© this fall.

PJ, Your Ever Worshipful (Worshipless) Grand Poobah
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02-10-2013, 02:01 PM
RE: I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
(02-10-2013 12:30 PM)PleaseJesus Wrote:  
(01-10-2013 03:10 PM)ridethespiral Wrote:  You read the Dune Series?

Lol which mod are you and what have you done with PJ?

The Frank Herbert six, the two continuation novels, Paul of Dune and I just finished The Winds of Dune. I have the David Lynch director's cut and the two SyFy series at home, too. Dune is now required reading for all Cratheists, what with its complete and total spiritual nature and the fact that all of its important religious traditions are also conspiratorial plants from those seeking to control the masses.

I'm Chas, back moderating again. I killed PJ and replaced him with a human being. PJ was a real !@#%, wasn't he? Good riddance.

Don't take my name in vain - I will smite thee. Dodgy

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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02-10-2013, 10:28 PM
RE: I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
I think the saddest part is in light of Egor, Marky, and that BibleCodeEditorWhatever guy; coming here and creating a religion isn't even novel anymore... Weeping

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03-10-2013, 12:17 AM
RE: I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
(02-10-2013 10:28 PM)EvolutionKills Wrote:  I think the saddest part is in light of Egor, Marky, and that BibleCodeEditorWhatever guy; coming here and creating a religion isn't even novel anymore... Weeping

Well, from what I can tell christianity is already dead as a religion. It has now evolved to being "a philosophy", with a side note of having to have a personal relationship with jesus.

So now, as long as you adhere to jesus' teachings, and still claim some belief in a higher being you'll stay out of hell.

It's simply the old "Don't be a dick" creed with a side of Alcoholics Anonymous. It is indeed a sad state of affairs when religion can't ruthlessly kick ass anymore......

But now I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

~ Umberto Eco
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03-10-2013, 01:46 AM
RE: I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
(02-10-2013 10:28 PM)EvolutionKills Wrote:  I think the saddest part is in light of Egor, Marky, and that BibleCodeEditorWhatever guy; coming here and creating a religion isn't even novel anymore... Weeping

It makes sense. Why would a religious follower create a religion? Only three types of people create religions. Atheists who don't like the current reality and have a longing for 'somthingness'. People that see an opportunity to profit off of said people (may or may not believe in somthinganity or somethingism), and people who are batshit crazy and could very easily be some combination of the aforemntioned.

Atheism - where people go to create gods™.

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07-10-2013, 02:47 PM
RE: I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
(03-10-2013 12:17 AM)evenheathen Wrote:  
(02-10-2013 10:28 PM)EvolutionKills Wrote:  I think the saddest part is in light of Egor, Marky, and that BibleCodeEditorWhatever guy; coming here and creating a religion isn't even novel anymore... Weeping

Well, from what I can tell christianity is already dead as a religion. It has now evolved to being "a philosophy", with a side note of having to have a personal relationship with jesus.

So now, as long as you adhere to jesus' teachings, and still claim some belief in a higher being you'll stay out of hell.

It's simply the old "Don't be a dick" creed with a side of Alcoholics Anonymous. It is indeed a sad state of affairs when religion can't ruthlessly kick ass anymore......

If you say so. I'm offering you a way out!

Don't commit until you have explored all that we Cratheists have to offer you:

*The chance to miss Hell or go there or deny its existence

*The opportunity to refute yourself with self-contradictory, circular reasoning

*The chance to interpret the facts correctly, eg, take the many proofs of Evolution along with its irreducible complexities and missing links and say "Ah, it's all good now"

Etc.

"For all the memories and the meals,
We lift our hymn of praise,
We sing for all the golden girls,
For all freethinking ways.

And through the many years of Hell,
Our hearts will always be,
Beneath an empty, godless sky,
Forever eternally."


-Poobles
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07-10-2013, 03:09 PM
RE: I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
I see you all failed to see 2 things.

First:

(01-10-2013 09:12 AM)PleaseJesus Wrote:  I hereby by divine fiat

[Image: divine-fiat-copy1.jpg?w=450&h=299]

Second:

Cretinism and cretintheists...

Big Grin

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I have a theory that the truth is never told during the nine-to-five hours.
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08-10-2013, 02:31 PM
RE: I Call All Cratheists To My Side!
(07-10-2013 03:09 PM)Filox Wrote:  I see you all failed to see 2 things.

First:

(01-10-2013 09:12 AM)PleaseJesus Wrote:  I hereby by divine fiat

[Image: divine-fiat-copy1.jpg?w=450&h=299]

Second:

Cretinism and cretintheists...

Big Grin

Hey! Not nice! All men and women are Cratheated equal.
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