I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
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16-07-2014, 12:36 PM
I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
My wife and kids are really getting to me lately. They fight and bicker amoung themselves all the time. I get to deal with it from the time I get home from work until I go to bed during the week and from the time I get up until the time I go to bed on the weekend. It is hardly ever anything important. Some nights I just can not take it and take myself outside and read in the quiet. When I do go outside someone comes out after a few minutes to unload to me about how bad their day was. So if I get more than 10 minutes of quite I consider myself lucky. They can not even turn it off when we are in public. We went to dinner Sunday night and they started at each other at the table, all of them. I asked them to save it for home, told them to be quite, even told them they were embarasing me. Nothing worked. The four of them bickered the entire meal.

Right now I totally understand why some men walk out on their families.
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16-07-2014, 12:37 PM
RE: I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
Time for counseling?
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16-07-2014, 12:38 PM
RE: I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
(16-07-2014 12:37 PM)Hobbitgirl Wrote:  Time for counseling?

My wife and both my girls are already in consouling. My wife and the younger one are on mood stabilizing meds.
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16-07-2014, 12:40 PM
RE: I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
Do you have teenagers? It might just be something you'll have to ride out sadly. Sad

I am sorry however that you're having to deal with this. Its rough when people are struggling to get along, especially when its people you care for.
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16-07-2014, 12:45 PM
RE: I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
(16-07-2014 12:40 PM)Hobbitgirl Wrote:  Do you have teenagers? It might just be something you'll have to ride out sadly. Sad

I am sorry however that you're having to deal with this. Its rough when people are struggling to get along, especially when its people you care for.

Basically all three of my kids. The girls are 15 and 14. My son is 11. My wife acts like a teen most of the time to boot.

Some nights I just sit there and watch them going WTF. They fight over the littlest of things.
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16-07-2014, 12:48 PM
RE: I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
(16-07-2014 12:45 PM)wazzel Wrote:  
(16-07-2014 12:40 PM)Hobbitgirl Wrote:  Do you have teenagers? It might just be something you'll have to ride out sadly. Sad

I am sorry however that you're having to deal with this. Its rough when people are struggling to get along, especially when its people you care for.

Basically all three of my kids. The girls are 15 and 14. My son is 11. My wife acts like a teen most of the time to boot.

Some nights I just sit there and watch them going WTF. They fight over the littlest of things.


Teenage girls....Oh dear, time to take up drinking. Tongue I promise we get better around the age of 20-21
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16-07-2014, 12:59 PM
RE: I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
(16-07-2014 12:48 PM)Hobbitgirl Wrote:  
(16-07-2014 12:45 PM)wazzel Wrote:  Basically all three of my kids. The girls are 15 and 14. My son is 11. My wife acts like a teen most of the time to boot.

Some nights I just sit there and watch them going WTF. They fight over the littlest of things.


Teenage girls....Oh dear, time to take up drinking. Tongue I promise we get better around the age of 20-21

I medicate by running and cycling. I live in south Lousiaina so it is hot and humid this time a year. I go run three times a week around 7:30pm (during the winter I go earlier) so I get a nice break from the giant bitch fest. I hit the road with my bike first thing in the morning Sat and Sun for 40+ miles each day. They are still in bed when I get home, but the ride is real rural and clears my head from the week.

I am doing a sprint distance Tri on Aug, 2nd.

In addition I have a saltwater reef tank that I tinker with. It is also a quiet (not noise level quiet since it is in our family room) place for me. I have a stool next to the tank so I can sit watch the fish and corals to chill out.
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16-07-2014, 01:16 PM
RE: I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
The girls will get easier to deal with...
Your son will take a little longer.
The wife, honestly can't help you there.

I'm sorry tho they all behave that way while dining out.

When my kids were little and acted out in restaurants I would remove them (only happened a couple times).

I think if they (along with my spouse) behaved that way in public today, I'd just remove myself. I would just hop in the car and leave them.


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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16-07-2014, 04:20 PM
RE: I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
Family counselling all together. Sounds like a communication break down between everyone. Yelling, bickering and one-way venting are not productive as a whole. From your OP blurb it sounds like some skills are needed.

If formal counselling isn't your thing, I'd be researching communication within family dynamic and sharing articles and things. Sometimes people just aren't aware how negative they are and it can spiral or pass on to others. Good for you for not engaging and wondering how to stop it.
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16-07-2014, 05:19 PM
RE: I am going to sound like a bad father and spouce
(16-07-2014 04:20 PM)LadyJane Wrote:  Family counselling all together. Sounds like a communication break down between everyone. Yelling, bickering and one-way venting are not productive as a whole. From your OP blurb it sounds like some skills are needed.

If formal counselling isn't your thing, I'd be researching communication within family dynamic and sharing articles and things. Sometimes people just aren't aware how negative they are and it can spiral or pass on to others. Good for you for not engaging and wondering how to stop it.

Yes. Its really good you aren't engaging and can notice that something is wrong. Thats the first step. Smile
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