I feel trapped!
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15-04-2016, 03:54 PM
I feel trapped!
I feel so trapped. I live in a religious home and I go to a religious school. It's really tough. I feel like a freak among the other at times.

Last Saturday, my parents found out that I'm an atheist. My dad was asking me all sorts of questions that I really didn't want to answer. I answered honestly, though. My mom was pretty quiet. My dad also told me a bunch of things that only made me scared and confused. It didn't really make me convinced of the god of the Bible of anything. Stuff about how demons are deceiving me and how I won't be in heaven if I stay this way.

On Wednesday or Thursday this week, my dad decided to confront me again. Basically, he used more personal experiences ("God helped me to stop drinking"), fallacies ("There are no atheists on a sinking ship"), and personal opinions. He used the fact that I like the same sex to tell me that I can get help from the holy spirit. The holy spirit can make me straight or whatever.

If I were to go back to Christianity in any way, it wouldn't be honest. I would feel like I'm lying to myself. It would be out of total fear. I would lost my mind because of all the cognitive dissonance.

A really interesting thing I was told is that I'll be worse off without Yahweh. The exact opposite has been the case. I'm more stressed about the religion around me than atheism. Since becoming an atheist, I've been happier. My love for science has been amplified. I already liked science a lot, but I have a very intense love for it now. I have more motivation to stay alive because I'm not waiting for an afterlife.

I'm looking forward to this fall because I'll be in college and away from religion being everywhere. I don't mind being around religious people. I have religious friends and I care about them very much. The thing I don't like is when religion is forced on me.

I needed to get that out. Thanks for reading.
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15-04-2016, 04:06 PM
RE: I feel trapped!
:hugL

Don't let those gnomes and their illusions get you down. They're just gnomes and illusions.

--Jake the Dog, Adventure Time

Alouette, je te plumerai.
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15-04-2016, 04:10 PM
RE: I feel trapped!
Sorry to hear that buddy. It's comes with the territory.

The best defense is to ask questions.

Don't Live each day like it's your last. Live each day like you have 541 days after that one where every choice you make will have lasting implications to you and the world around you. ~ Tim Minchin
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15-04-2016, 05:19 PM
RE: I feel trapped!
Thanks, guys. *hugs*
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15-04-2016, 07:57 PM
RE: I feel trapped!
Fall will be here before you know and your life will be all changed.

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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16-04-2016, 02:34 AM
RE: I feel trapped!
Hug

Still, you'll feel a lot better at college and away from such a stifling environment. I wish I had lived on campus instead of staying with my dad and step-mom, because they're both really ignorant (read: creationist) southern baptists. Could never really have an honest conversation with them, and I felt like an outsider in my own home. I mean, they printed out those super stupid and bigoted anti-atheist memes on Facebook and plastered them all over the kitchen, even after they knew I was an atheist. Man, fuck that shit. Now I have a flat-mate (who just happens to be the younger brother of my best friend, so he's pretty cool too), and I play games and hang out on the forum when I'm not at work.

Actually, I do the forum thing at work too. Tongue

[Image: E3WvRwZ.gif]
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16-04-2016, 07:20 AM
RE: I feel trapped!
I've come to find I rarely like people that haven't been through struggles. Or maybe it's that they can't relate to me...

The beauty of college is that your friend pool is not so limited. Take this time over the next few months to try out some new hobbies and get a summer job (if you don't already have one).

Soon this will be a fading memory filed in the "thank Jesus fuck that's over" bin. August will be here before you know it. You're about to experience one of the all time highs of your life - I'm excited for you.

Also, parents often chill out after you're gone to college - they'll miss you and be excited when you come back home. If they start on the hate talk, get up and leave, and hopefully they'll stop that shit instead of alienating you from their lives.

"If there's a single thing that life teaches us, it's that wishing doesn't make it so." - Lev Grossman
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16-04-2016, 02:53 PM
RE: I feel trapped!
Thanks, guys. ^^

For some reason, I feel like a jerk for leaving Christianity. If I were to go back though, it would not be honest. I would just be going through the motions without being totally convinced of any deity. I like to be honest with myself. My mom seems to be handling it well.

One thing that scares me is when I see a coincidence that makes me think of God or the fact that I left Christianity. I get thoughts like "That's a message from God. Stop ignoring him. You're gonna go to hell." It's really scary. Will it pass with time?
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16-04-2016, 02:58 PM
RE: I feel trapped!
(15-04-2016 03:54 PM)CosmicRaven Wrote:  I feel so trapped. I live in a religious home and I go to a religious school. It's really tough. I feel like a freak among the other at times.

Last Saturday, my parents found out that I'm an atheist. My dad was asking me all sorts of questions that I really didn't want to answer. I answered honestly, though. My mom was pretty quiet. My dad also told me a bunch of things that only made me scared and confused. It didn't really make me convinced of the god of the Bible of anything. Stuff about how demons are deceiving me and how I won't be in heaven if I stay this way.

On Wednesday or Thursday this week, my dad decided to confront me again. Basically, he used more personal experiences ("God helped me to stop drinking"), fallacies ("There are no atheists on a sinking ship"), and personal opinions. He used the fact that I like the same sex to tell me that I can get help from the holy spirit. The holy spirit can make me straight or whatever.

If I were to go back to Christianity in any way, it wouldn't be honest. I would feel like I'm lying to myself. It would be out of total fear. I would lost my mind because of all the cognitive dissonance.

A really interesting thing I was told is that I'll be worse off without Yahweh. The exact opposite has been the case. I'm more stressed about the religion around me than atheism. Since becoming an atheist, I've been happier. My love for science has been amplified. I already liked science a lot, but I have a very intense love for it now. I have more motivation to stay alive because I'm not waiting for an afterlife.

I'm looking forward to this fall because I'll be in college and away from religion being everywhere. I don't mind being around religious people. I have religious friends and I care about them very much. The thing I don't like is when religion is forced on me.

I needed to get that out. Thanks for reading.
Because "they" are afraid to step out from under their Jesus umbrella they assume it is scary out there and should be for you too. We have love to share here too. Not a we'll love you if you believe the things we say to believe, but because you are you! Heads up high, no sadness for having graduated out of Christianity. Welcome to reality.
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16-04-2016, 03:16 PM
RE: I feel trapped!
(16-04-2016 02:58 PM)DerFish Wrote:  Because "they" are afraid to step out from under their Jesus umbrella they assume it is scary out there and should be for you too. We have love to share here too. Not a we'll love you if you believe the things we say to believe, but because you are you! Heads up high, no sadness for having graduated out of Christianity. Welcome to reality.

Thanks. I really do appreciate the love. When I left Christianity, I realised that the things I had been taught about atheists were not true. There a lot of great atheist people. I just started posting on this forum, but everyone has been really accepting.

Thanks. I do feel really welcome. ^^ I really appreciate your post.
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