I finally got help.
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25-09-2015, 10:35 PM
I finally got help.
I've had one of the worst depression swings I've ever had in my life this past month. I finally had a breakdown and decided to go into the doctor at a walk-in appointment. I was at the point where I wasn't contemplating suicide, but things were bad enough that I was afraid of what could happen in another month if my swings continued.

When I went in, I was turned away because it had been too long since I saw my primary care doctor. I felt completely and utterly hopeless and upset that they were turning me away. I finally asked to speak to a supervisor or manager on shift and she came out and talked to me. I discussed my situation and she kept asking me if I needed to be sent to the ER for suicide watch. I convinced her I didn't need to do so but I NEEDED to see someone for help.

She took down my info and promised me she would fit me in that week. She lived up to her word, I saw a psychologist, was diagnosed with moderate depression and anxiety and put on an SSRI.

I was so terrified of how the medication would affect me, and it has only helped me. No bad side effects, I feel energized for the first time in forever, my anxiety episodes seem fine, and my depression is just... not there.

I mean I'll encounter things where I am actively thinking, "I feel like this should make me feel depressed usually but... eh. It's fine really and I'll get over it." Other times when I encounter something I'd usually worry till I'm about in a panic attack I just go, "Oh ok, well, that's fine. I'll figure it out."

I can finally concentrate on working on starting a business up without feeling overwhelmed, I can finally enjoy my hobbies again, I can finally do the things I love and have a normal relationship and friendship with people. I haven't felt this way in years and years and years.

Several people on here have told me to get help and given me advice. My girlfriend finally convinced me to just go in and talk to someone due to how bad my swings were and I'm glad I took the advice.

So far the only weird side effect is my body reaction in a way that kind of feels like an adrenaline rush about 7 hours in, but my pulse is fine, and i just feel really wired and energetic for a few hours after. It isn't bad or scary, just, "OH so much energy what do I do with it all?"

That said, this is the end of my HAPPY week. Scotch and cigar to celebrate being HAPPY and not depressed.

Just wanted to say thank you everyone who ever gave me advice and steered me that way. It has taken quite a few people over this time to finally convince me. One of the few that gave me the first convincing opinion about it was Chas. It was not until a few close friends and my girlfriend said some very similar things about getting help did it click and I went, "I just need to do something or this is never going to change."

If anyone else is dealing with any really bad depression, or is ever afraid it could get to the point of suicidal thoughts... do not be afraid of medication, do not be afraid to get help, do not be afraid to talk. The best things I have done recently is open up, talk to people that care about me, talk to an actual psychologist who can help me from a neutral perspective and finally get on something that helps me. My only side effects have been being happy so far. I call that a side effect because depression has been my constant mood for so damn long.

Official ordained minister of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Please pm me with prayer requests to his noodly goodness. Remember, he boiled for your sins and loves you. Carbo Diem! RAmen.
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25-09-2015, 10:48 PM
RE: I finally got help.
Hug

Great to hear things are well for you! Smile
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25-09-2015, 10:49 PM
RE: I finally got help.
That's great news, bud ... and great advice.
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25-09-2015, 10:50 PM
RE: I finally got help.
I'm glad you got some help. Take care of yourself and feel free to PM if you want to talk Hug Heart

Swing with me a while, we can listen to the birds call, we can keep each other warm.
Swing with me forever, we can count up every flower, we can weather every storm.
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25-09-2015, 10:52 PM
RE: I finally got help.
This is such good news. I am exceedingly happy for you. Smile

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
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25-09-2015, 10:53 PM
RE: I finally got help.
Hug I'm glad you are doing well.
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26-09-2015, 02:55 AM
RE: I finally got help.
Thats awesome. I had the same thing and went in for help about 4 years ago best thing I ever did.

Its all going to OK I'm so glad you got help and you can deal wyth things in the right way. Its an awesome feeling when you know thus is the right thing for you.

(((Hugs)))
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26-09-2015, 03:30 AM
RE: I finally got help.
Well done. Just remember though not to rely on them. Anti-depressants break the cycle of being depressed which make you think about things that make you even more depressed. You need to use this time to change your life to give yourself something else to focus on, for example, starting a business, doing hobbies that you enjoy etc. And to build in good habits like eating properly and staying away from depressants like alcohol etc.
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26-09-2015, 03:34 AM
RE: I finally got help.
Great to hear! Sometimes we just need a little help to break through the fog.

You are missed around here.

Heart

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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26-09-2015, 03:59 AM
RE: I finally got help.
(26-09-2015 03:30 AM)Mathilda Wrote:  Well done. Just remember though not to rely on them.

I don't see why not. People are on chronic diabetes medication and the like, what's the difference?

Well played Logisch Smile

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If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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