I just came out to my mother.
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09-03-2012, 12:00 AM
 
RE: I just came out to my mother.
(08-03-2012 08:55 PM)FSM_scot Wrote:  The op is 25 years old so I don't know where you are getting all this rebellious teen shit from.

You're right. And I have to change my opinion here in light of that. If he's 25, he can do whatever he wants. If his parents still have him living at home and paying for him to become a professional gamer, then...whatever.

His post sounded like a teen. I should have checked his profile.

(08-03-2012 09:11 PM)Hughsie Wrote:  Just out of interest would you see it as disrespectful for a teenager to tell their Atheist parents that they had become a Christian?

Not at all. That shows a responsible, clear-thinking, morally-oriented individual. I think he should become a follower of Christ rather than a Christian, but at least Christian is a start. But this guy is a "gamer." Which means he's spent his entire life wasting away in front of a computer screen doing absolutely nothing of any importance all on his parent's dime. Sliding into atheism is just par for the course in this situation.
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09-03-2012, 12:04 AM
RE: I just came out to my mother.
(09-03-2012 12:00 AM)Egor Wrote:  Not at all. That shows a responsible, clear-thinking, morally-oriented individual. I think he should become a follower of Christ rather than a Christian, but at least Christian is a start. But he's a "gamer." Which means he's spent his entire life wasting away in front of a computer screen doing absolutely nothing of any importance all on his parent's dime. Sliding into atheism is just par for the course in this situation.

So for an Atheist teenager to be honest with his parents is the height of disrespect whilst for a Christian teenager to be honest with his parents is the height of responsibility?

Does that not strike you as a bit of a double standard? Can you see why people may feel you are biased?

Best and worst of Ferdinand .....
Best
Ferdinand: We don't really say 'theist' in Alabama. Here, you're either a Christian, or you're from Afghanistan and we fucking hate you.
Worst
Ferdinand: Everyone from British is so, like, fucking retarded.
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09-03-2012, 12:19 AM
 
RE: I just came out to my mother.
(09-03-2012 12:04 AM)Hughsie Wrote:  Does that not strike you as a bit of a double standard? Can you see why people may feel you are biased?

ahem...Was there ever any question regarding my bias?

Look, atheism is a loser's game. It's what you do when you've given up in life. It's what you subscribe to when you can't figure anything out, you're disgusted with the Church, no one will hold your hand anymore and convince you that God is real, and you want to engage in some kind of sin, or what you think is a sin--usually something sexual, usually homosexuality. I'm not faulting homosexuals; I'm just saying that the Church tells them it is wrong, so they give up their faith in God to balance things out. To them, God and Church are inseparable.

It's also a lazy attitude. An atheist doesn't have to do any of their own thinking. They just give up on tackling the hard issues. That's why I said this guy becoming an atheist is pretty much expected. I guarantee you there's some secondary gain to his atheism. You know sometimes people just want other people to worry about them and pray for them. Not for any particular reason; it just makes them feel more significant, and they don't give a damn how much it hurts others. They're not about to get off their butt and do something to make others proud.

Now, why would a 25-year-old want to make his mother cry? All he had to do was get a job on Sunday's and he'd never have to go to church again.

While we're at it, why are you an atheist? What do you get out of it?

By the way, I read your profile. I'm impressed that a young man is willing to work two jobs and is looking forward to going to school to do something meaningful in this world. Kudos, and good luck to you.
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09-03-2012, 12:34 AM
RE: I just came out to my mother.
(09-03-2012 12:19 AM)Egor Wrote:  ahem...Was there ever any question regarding my bias?

Look, atheism is a loser's game. It's what you do when you've given up in life. It's what you subscribe to when you can't figure anything out, you're disgusted with the Church, no one will hold your hand anymore and convince you that God is real, and you want to engage in some kind of sin, or what you think is a sin--usually something sexual, usually homosexuality. I'm not faulting homosexuals; I'm just saying that the Church tells them it is wrong, so they give up their faith in God to balance things out. To them, God and Church are inseparable.

It's also a lazy attitude. An atheist doesn't have to do any of their own thinking. They just give up on tackling the hard issues. That's why I said this guy becoming an atheist is pretty much expected. I guarantee you there's some secondary gain to his atheism. You know sometimes people just want other people to worry about them and pray for them. Not for any particular reason; it just makes them feel more significant, and they don't give a damn how much it hurts others. They're not about to get off their butt and do something to make others proud.

Now, why would a 25-year-old want to make his mother cry? All he had to do was get a job on Sunday's and he'd never have to go to church again.

While we're at it, why are you an atheist? What do you get out of it?

By the way, I read your profile. I'm impressed that a young man is willing to work two jobs and is looking forward to going to school to do something meaningful in this world. Kudos, and good luck to you.

I don't get anything. What could I possibly gain?

I see Atheism as the opposite as a by-product of laziness. The lazy option is to be a Theist for most people, they are brought up by Theists so that is the easy option. Deciding you don't agree with your parents and you have your own views on the universe is anything but easy, lazy or the sign of someone who hasn't thought about things.

Also for the record I don't want to sin. Sin doesn't exist for me. I don't believe in a divine power that lays down rules and so I don't believe in the possibility of breaking divinely mandated rules.

As far as making his mother cry goes then yes, that is a symptom of a sick society. Not that he has made his mother cry but that she would cry at something as trivial as having a son who asks for evidence in life and can think for himself, they should be virtues in any sane society.

You seem to think being an atheist is a choice made for social or political reasons, it isn't. Asking someone why they are an Atheist is like someone asking you why you are a Theist. It's the way you view the world, that's all there is to it. If you delve deeper then there are reasons you can find that may lead people one way or another but they aren't things we can choose, they're involuntary. You didn't seem to be asking that though, your question implied you were asking for concious choices.

----------------------------------

Thank you. I have to be honest, as much as I disagree with you I think you are sincere in your beliefs and that is something I can respect. I have a lot more time for someone like you who I honestly think believes he is doing the right thing than people who are clearly using religion to further their own ends. Good luck to you too.

Best and worst of Ferdinand .....
Best
Ferdinand: We don't really say 'theist' in Alabama. Here, you're either a Christian, or you're from Afghanistan and we fucking hate you.
Worst
Ferdinand: Everyone from British is so, like, fucking retarded.
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09-03-2012, 02:14 AM
 
RE: I just came out to my mother.
(09-03-2012 12:34 AM)Hughsie Wrote:  I don't get anything. What could I possibly gain?

I see Atheism as the opposite as a by-product of laziness. The lazy option is to be a Theist for most people, they are brought up by Theists so that is the easy option. Deciding you don't agree with your parents and you have your own views on the universe is anything but easy, lazy or the sign of someone who hasn't thought about things.

Also for the record I don't want to sin. Sin doesn't exist for me. I don't believe in a divine power that lays down rules and so I don't believe in the possibility of breaking divinely mandated rules.

As far as making his mother cry goes then yes, that is a symptom of a sick society. Not that he has made his mother cry but that she would cry at something as trivial as having a son who asks for evidence in life and can think for himself, they should be virtues in any sane society.

You seem to think being an atheist is a choice made for social or political reasons, it isn't. Asking someone why they are an Atheist is like someone asking you why you are a Theist. It's the way you view the world, that's all there is to it. If you delve deeper then there are reasons you can find that may lead people one way or another but they aren't things we can choose, they're involuntary. You didn't seem to be asking that though, your question implied you were asking for concious choices.

----------------------------------

Thank you. I have to be honest, as much as I disagree with you I think you are sincere in your beliefs and that is something I can respect. I have a lot more time for someone like you who I honestly think believes he is doing the right thing than people who are clearly using religion to further their own ends. Good luck to you too.

And thank you. But you said, "Sin doesn't exist for me." Methinks you just answered my question.

As a Veridican, I only read The Veridican Gospel of Jesus Christ. And throughout it, Jesus confirms that we do in fact sin. Could it be that you are an atheist (and this is a rhetorical question) because as soon as you give up a belief in God, the concept of sin just goes poof? Could it be a deep-seated need for perfection? That's why I'm a theist. That's why I'm a Veridican and not a Christian.

Or perhaps, as Hannibal Lector would say, your pathology is a thousand times more savage. Could it be you have to get rid of the notion of sin at all costs?

So many young people are becoming atheists these days. What's going to happen when they discover they can morally do anything they want? What's going to happen when they put that into practice? We already had the sexual revolution. What's next?
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09-03-2012, 02:22 AM
RE: I just came out to my mother.
(09-03-2012 02:14 AM)Egor Wrote:  
(09-03-2012 12:34 AM)Hughsie Wrote:  I don't get anything. What could I possibly gain?

I see Atheism as the opposite as a by-product of laziness. The lazy option is to be a Theist for most people, they are brought up by Theists so that is the easy option. Deciding you don't agree with your parents and you have your own views on the universe is anything but easy, lazy or the sign of someone who hasn't thought about things.

Also for the record I don't want to sin. Sin doesn't exist for me. I don't believe in a divine power that lays down rules and so I don't believe in the possibility of breaking divinely mandated rules.

As far as making his mother cry goes then yes, that is a symptom of a sick society. Not that he has made his mother cry but that she would cry at something as trivial as having a son who asks for evidence in life and can think for himself, they should be virtues in any sane society.

You seem to think being an atheist is a choice made for social or political reasons, it isn't. Asking someone why they are an Atheist is like someone asking you why you are a Theist. It's the way you view the world, that's all there is to it. If you delve deeper then there are reasons you can find that may lead people one way or another but they aren't things we can choose, they're involuntary. You didn't seem to be asking that though, your question implied you were asking for concious choices.

----------------------------------

Thank you. I have to be honest, as much as I disagree with you I think you are sincere in your beliefs and that is something I can respect. I have a lot more time for someone like you who I honestly think believes he is doing the right thing than people who are clearly using religion to further their own ends. Good luck to you too.

And thank you. But you said, "Sin doesn't exist for me." Methinks you just answered my question.

As a Veridican, I only read The Veridican Gospel of Jesus Christ. And throughout it, Jesus confirms that we do in fact sin. Could it be that you are an atheist (and this is a rhetorical question) because as soon as you give up a belief in God, the concept of sin just goes poof? Could it be a deep-seated need for perfection? That's why I'm a theist. That's why I'm a Veridican and not a Christian.

Or perhaps, as Hannibal Lector would say, your pathology is a thousand times more savage. Could it be you have to get rid of the notion of sin at all costs?

So many young people are becoming atheists these days. What's going to happen when they discover they can morally do anything they want? What's going to happen when they put that into practice? We already had the sexual revolution. What's next?

are you seriously implying that the only possible morality has to come from a book? morality doesn't necessarily comes from god you know? you should trying to read something other than your fantasy literature and you might learn something

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09-03-2012, 02:44 AM
RE: I just came out to my mother.
congratulations about your coming out. I know I am a bit late but who cares.
Great step and it sounds you handled it just fine Smile
Good luck with your dad.
Don't let anybody give you bad feelings about it. Most certainly it is better to not know some things than claim knowledge that is unproven or believe without questioning.

cheers

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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09-03-2012, 03:12 AM
RE: I just came out to my mother.
(09-03-2012 02:14 AM)He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named Wrote:  As a Veridican, I only read The Veridican Gospel of Jesus Christ. And throughout it, Jesus confirms that we do in fact sin.

LOL!

Nothing like finding answers in the book you yourself wrote.

(09-03-2012 12:19 AM)He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named Wrote:  
(09-03-2012 12:04 AM)Hughsie Wrote:  Does that not strike you as a bit of a double standard? Can you see why people may feel you are biased?

ahem...Was there ever any question regarding my bias?

Only before you started speaking.

(09-03-2012 12:19 AM)He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named Wrote:  Look, atheism is a loser's game. It's what you do when you've given up in life. It's what you subscribe to when you can't figure anything out...

Up to this point, you describe Theism.

(09-03-2012 12:19 AM)He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named Wrote:  ...you're disgusted with the Church...

Quite.

(09-03-2012 12:19 AM)He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named Wrote:  ...no one will hold your hand anymore and convince you that God is real...

If by "hold your hand" you mean "browbeat you", then yes.

(09-03-2012 12:19 AM)He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named Wrote:  ...and you want to engage in some kind of sin, or what you think is a sin--usually something sexual, usually homosexuality.

Huh Yeup, everybody here is a homosexual. In fact, I've been harboring secret homosexual feelings for you. I secretly want to have gay sex with you because I'm an atheist. Or rather, I became an atheist because the church frowned upon all the gay sex I wanted to have with you.

Dumbass.

(09-03-2012 12:19 AM)He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named Wrote:  It's also a lazy attitude. An atheist doesn't have to do any of their own thinking. They just give up on tackling the hard issues.

You're right, I just gave up and shut my brain down when I became an atheist. I stopped asking the hard questions about difficult issues. Things like "Can reindeer really fly?", "What IS at the end of the rainbow?", "What happens if you catch the horizon?", and "How much wind can you fit in a box?" I really need to redevote my life to pleasing an invisible deity whose only interaction with me is through whispers in my head, the things my pastor says, and the occasional natural disaster. Because it's the BRAVE thing to do.

(09-03-2012 12:19 AM)He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named Wrote:  That's why I said this guy becoming an atheist is pretty much expected. I guarantee you there's some secondary gain to his atheism.

Happiness. Freedom. Release. Joy. Hyggelig.

(09-03-2012 12:19 AM)He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named Wrote:  Now, why would a 25-year-old want to make his mother cry? All he had to do was get a job on Sunday's and he'd never have to go to church again.

Sometimes honesty hurts. But you're right, the BRAVE thing to do would be to keep pretending you feel the way your mother wants you to feel so that you don't have to make her sad. Lying to your mom is pretty damn brave.

(09-03-2012 12:19 AM)He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named Wrote:  By the way, I read your profile. I'm impressed that a young man is willing to work two jobs and is looking forward to going to school to do something meaningful in this world. Kudos, and good luck to you.

Don't be fooled! He's an atheist, and according to Veridican Dynamics, atheists are lazy gay cowards who only seek self-gratification at the expense of others' suffering.

Read the things you write sometime, you fucking tool. Oh wait, I forgot, you ONLY read the Gospel of Veridican Dynamics. Maybe read something from the real world sometime, you fucking tool.
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09-03-2012, 05:41 AM
RE: I just came out to my mother.
(09-03-2012 12:00 AM)Egor Wrote:  You're right. And I have to change my opinion here in light of that. If he's 25, he can do whatever he wants. If his parents still have him living at home and paying for him to become a professional gamer, then...whatever.

His post sounded like a teen. I should have checked his profile.

Again you are jumping to conclusions based on non existant facts.

At no point in this thread does the op say he still lives with his parents, he also at no point says he's a gamer.
But even if he is a gamer that doesn't mean that's all he does, you don't know if he's in education, or works, and even if he does live with his parents so what! There are many reason for that, have you any idea how hard it is to find affordable housing these days? I have friends that have been on the housing list for over a year and are still waiting.

Next time try thinking before jumping to conclusions about things you don't have a clue about.

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09-03-2012, 07:18 AM
RE: I just came out to my mother.
I'm glad it went well Hollowpoint. I can understand the idea of making it no big deal, but probably for your life it has been a big deal. I myself when forcing the fact that I was female out, went to school. Then after they had to accept it happened I talked to them. It kinda made it easier for me that they saw it first, since they could no longer act like it wasn't true.

I use the word force because I was abrupt. I don't have an atheism story because I as a child demanded we not go to church and won. Had my family never known that I was a girl I would've moved out, probably before 18 and never spoke to them again. I have already cut off my dad's entire family due to this lying thing. It is definitely not a bad thing to let your family know who you are. Congratulations for allowing your mother to remain an important if sometimes awkward part of your life.

How many days are you waiting to tell your dad? If you wait a while he'll have formed an opinion from mom's talk with him, just as a warning. I had the ability to discuss with both it can sometimes make things easier. Did you ask your mom to let you tell him? I'm just mentioning because if he's been coached any this will be harder the second time around. Your mom will probably be on your side for you being happy, but that doesnt mean she'll handle it just like you want it.

Warning you ahead of time because the second go at it is always a bit worse than expected. Had my dad not been the first to tell his mother about me I might still see his family. Remember that they'll cry and regret for now as they are learning who you are, but soon enough they'll take pride in the fact that you're a happy child. As long as you better yourself your parents will be happy for you.

I'm not a non believer, I believe in the possibility of anything. I just don't let the actuality of something be determined by a 3rd party.
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