I'm confused... Help
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17-03-2016, 07:01 AM
I'm confused... Help
I go to a church regularly, and recently I have been talking with the pastor at the end of every... Meeting? Is that the word?
Anyway...
Reason I have been talking to him recently, is because I sin a lot.
He's been helping me pray for forgiveness, but last time he said God told him that simply praying isn't enough in my case.

And now, the confusing part.
My pastor told me that God instructed him to spank away the sins from my soul, so I put myself on his lap.
Today my butt is very sore, but I was thinking about it last night before sleeping whether this is a traditional way of ridding sins?
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17-03-2016, 07:04 AM
RE: I'm confused... Help
You're kidding, right?

[Image: 7oDSbD4.gif]
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17-03-2016, 07:25 AM
RE: I'm confused... Help
(17-03-2016 07:01 AM)Typho2k Wrote:  I go to a church regularly, and recently I have been talking with the pastor at the end of every... Meeting? Is that the word?
Anyway...
Reason I have been talking to him recently, is because I sin a lot.
He's been helping me pray for forgiveness, but last time he said God told him that simply praying isn't enough in my case.

And now, the confusing part.
My pastor told me that God instructed him to spank away the sins from my soul, so I put myself on his lap.
Today my butt is very sore, but I was thinking about it last night before sleeping whether this is a traditional way of ridding sins?

Bwahahahahaha.

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
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17-03-2016, 07:26 AM
RE: I'm confused... Help
(17-03-2016 07:04 AM)Vosur Wrote:  You're kidding, right?

You still here? Dude, take 3 months off.

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
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17-03-2016, 07:33 AM
RE: I'm confused... Help
(17-03-2016 07:01 AM)Typho2k Wrote:  I go to a church regularly, and recently I have been talking with the pastor at the end of every... Meeting? Is that the word?
Anyway...
Reason I have been talking to him recently, is because I sin a lot.
He's been helping me pray for forgiveness, but last time he said God told him that simply praying isn't enough in my case.

And now, the confusing part.
My pastor told me that God instructed him to spank away the sins from my soul, so I put myself on his lap.
Today my butt is very sore, but I was thinking about it last night before sleeping whether this is a traditional way of ridding sins?

2@

Marburg virus, Ebola, Rabies, HIV, Smallpox, Hantavirus, Dengue Fever all brought to you by god - who cares for us and loves us all Censored
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17-03-2016, 12:55 PM
RE: I'm confused... Help
How old are you? Male, Female? I never even spanked my children. That takes a lot of cheek.
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17-03-2016, 01:24 PM
RE: I'm confused... Help
[Image: 56035950.jpg]

Don't Live each day like it's your last. Live each day like you have 541 days after that one where every choice you make will have lasting implications to you and the world around you. ~ Tim Minchin
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17-03-2016, 02:55 PM
RE: I'm confused... Help
Strangely enough there's precious little humour in "jokes" like this.

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18-03-2016, 05:19 AM
RE: I'm confused... Help
I messed up so bad people think it's a joke Sad
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18-03-2016, 05:39 AM
RE: I'm confused... Help
im going to answer as though you are sincere, though I do think this is satire.

1) Sin is not real. No such thing exists. If you've done bad things to other people you should make it up to those people. If you haven't hurt anyone then you have done nothing wrong. Anyone who tells you otherwise is telling lies in order to make you feel bad.

2) God doesn't talk to your priest. Your priest doesn't know what God wants. Remember that God sent an angel to talk to Mary, but he speaks directly to your priest? No. He's telling lies.

3) Unless you are in catholic school this is not how people deal with sin. And even there they stopped doing it 15 years ago. This is wrong. At the very least it is not appropriate.
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