I'm falling apart a little bit.
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24-11-2014, 08:08 AM
RE: I'm falling apart a little bit.
I hate it when theists think atheists are incapable of feeling pain or mourning death. My adoptive dad died when I was a kid, my adoptive grandparents also died when I was a kid. My biological grandparents also have died. My adoptive uncle died when I was a teen. my mother was raped when I was a teen. And as old as my mom is now the slightest hint of health issues freaks the hell out of me. Seen many of her friends go over the years. I hate what that does to her mentally, but to her credit she manages. I have lost a few dear pets as well.

No one can say for anyone to what degree you cope. But what has gotten me through it is friends and family and not holding it in, and also knowing that it is part of a natural reality. It will happen to everyone at some point. Part of what helps me cope to a big degree is to not let the pain override the good thoughts and good times. Yes you will feel it, no you should not ignore it. But when you feel it getting out of control, find someone whom you are close to and can trust to be your sounding board and who can also point out the great things that you had.

Poetry by Brian37(poems by an atheist) Also on Facebook as BrianJames Rational Poet and Twitter Brianrrs37
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24-11-2014, 08:10 AM
RE: I'm falling apart a little bit.
Sorry LJ!Heart

Hug

" Generally speaking, the errors in religion are dangerous; those in philosophy only ridiculous."
David Hume
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24-11-2014, 08:31 AM
RE: I'm falling apart a little bit.
I'm sorry for your loss. Hug

It may help to find a different anniversary to celebrate - the day you met, the day you did that special thing, something more cheerful. At least you would have a more positive thing to think about.

Tuesday will arrive on schedule. Big Grin

We have enough youth. How about looking for the Fountain of Smart?
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24-11-2014, 08:55 AM
RE: I'm falling apart a little bit.
It sucks.

My husband died xmas morning 3 years ago, and I dread the day. Talk about something ruining xmas.

So, I know. All I can recommend is to try to spoil yourself a bit that day. The day will pass no matter how you tackle it. And it should get a little easier every passing year...

HeartHug

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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24-11-2014, 11:33 AM
RE: I'm falling apart a little bit.
Personally I don't do birthdays, anniversaries or Christmas. The world may have revolved around the sun completely marking the passing of a "year" but each day is different, you only have the now.

My mum, dad and a few friends are gone, I don't remember their death anniversaries (Last week marked 18 years my mum had passed, I only knew because my sister told me over the phone) and their not in heaven, their not looking down or watching over me. Anything I do to honour or remember them is for my benefit, not theirs.

Saying that it does not deal with the emotions we feel, that we go through.

You give some amazing advice LadyJane on the forum, you are a real asset. If the roles were reversed what advice would you give yourself?

I feel so much, and yet I feel nothing.
I am a rock, I am the sky, the birds and the trees and everything beyond.
I am the wind, in the fields in which I roar. I am the water, in which I drown.
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24-11-2014, 12:02 PM
RE: I'm falling apart a little bit.
Fuck. I'm no good at this.


Love you.

So many cats, so few good recipes.
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25-11-2014, 08:29 AM
RE: I'm falling apart a little bit.
IT'S TUESDAY!!!!

I know, it doesn't change anything. But you made it this far, you can make it to Wednesday, then Thursday, etc. Big Grin

We have enough youth. How about looking for the Fountain of Smart?
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25-11-2014, 03:43 PM
RE: I'm falling apart a little bit.
A big hug to you LJ from cyberspace. Heart

“I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man’s reasoning powers are not above the monkey’s.”~Mark Twain
“Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.”~ Ambrose Bierce
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25-11-2014, 04:07 PM
RE: I'm falling apart a little bit.
A a death anniversary, huh? I hate them, too. They separate us that much more and that much further from the one we've lost. Once this anniversary is over, you will have gone one more day further away from your special friend. One day further away from the day she unclasped her hand from yours. There may always be some unfinished part of you and the only resolve is to press on, alone.

I understand. Hug

The heart somehow makes it to tomorrow. Heart

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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25-11-2014, 04:32 PM
RE: I'm falling apart a little bit.
Crappy stuff tends to come up at Anniversaries: even anytime.
May be looking at the good stuff together, maybe not.
Hope you feel better soon.
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