Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
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06-11-2014, 05:32 AM
RE: Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
(06-11-2014 04:35 AM)Tomasia Wrote:  How about teaching children than sex is something you have only with someone that you love, that it should be something seen as meaningful and valued, and not given away just for hedonistic abandonment?

Is that also an unhealthy way to look at it?

You can... I guess... but the church goes a lot further than just "sex is something special you do with someone you love". They put it as "thinking thoughts of sex is evil", "masturbation is bad" - all these nice little hooks to make people feel guilty. It's surely not healthy then.

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(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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06-11-2014, 05:56 AM
RE: Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
(06-11-2014 05:32 AM)morondog Wrote:  You can... I guess... but the church goes a lot further than just "sex is something special you do with someone you love". They put it as "thinking thoughts of sex is evil", "masturbation is bad" - all these nice little hooks to make people feel guilty. It's surely not healthy then.

Well, I know plenty of individuals who have adopted this model, they've grown up and got married. There's nothing unhealthy about them, in fact I find them admirable. And I know plenty of individuals who had devalued themselves as the result of things such as promiscuity, and such who are "unhealthy"

Of course churches don't typically teach sex as evil, they teach it as something sacred, to be shared among husbands and wives, and most would suggest it's a thing of beauty, not to be thrown away so easily.
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06-11-2014, 06:23 AM
RE: Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
(06-11-2014 05:56 AM)Tomasia Wrote:  Of course churches don't typically teach sex as evil, they teach it as something sacred, to be shared among husbands and wives, and most would suggest it's a thing of beauty, not to be thrown away so easily.

What gets "thrown away"? And if it's a thing of beauty, why not have as much of it as possible?

Hate the belief, love the believer.
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06-11-2014, 06:30 AM
RE: Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
(06-11-2014 05:56 AM)Tomasia Wrote:  
(06-11-2014 05:32 AM)morondog Wrote:  You can... I guess... but the church goes a lot further than just "sex is something special you do with someone you love". They put it as "thinking thoughts of sex is evil", "masturbation is bad" - all these nice little hooks to make people feel guilty. It's surely not healthy then.

Well, I know plenty of individuals who have adopted this model, they've grown up and got married. There's nothing unhealthy about them,

You don't know that. What's more, you can't know that. You have absolutely no idea what goes on in another's mind. You are talkin' crapola.

Quote:in fact I find them admirable. And I know plenty of individuals who had devalued themselves as the result of things such as promiscuity, and such who are "unhealthy"

"Devalued" in your narrow uptight repressed view.

Quote:Of course churches don't typically teach sex as evil, they teach it as something sacred, to be shared among husbands and wives, and most would suggest it's a thing of beauty, not to be thrown away so easily.

As a matter of fact, they do. And it's all over Paul's epistles. He was one fucked up dude.
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06-11-2014, 06:40 AM
RE: Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
(06-11-2014 05:56 AM)Tomasia Wrote:  
(06-11-2014 05:32 AM)morondog Wrote:  You can... I guess... but the church goes a lot further than just "sex is something special you do with someone you love". They put it as "thinking thoughts of sex is evil", "masturbation is bad" - all these nice little hooks to make people feel guilty. It's surely not healthy then.

Well, I know plenty of individuals who have adopted this model, they've grown up and got married. There's nothing unhealthy about them, in fact I find them admirable. And I know plenty of individuals who had devalued themselves as the result of things such as promiscuity, and such who are "unhealthy"

Of course churches don't typically teach sex as evil, they teach it as something sacred, to be shared among husbands and wives, and most would suggest it's a thing of beauty, not to be thrown away so easily.

So you're saying all that teenage angst about sinning, all that guilt about kissing in the back seat, all that meaningless stupid shit, is a good thing? You're saying that churches don't teach that these things are evil and shameful? 'Cos buddy, *your* church may not have but there's many more that go by the label "church" that do. And it is a bad thing and causes needless harm in many peoples' lives.

Devalued? Yeah, code word for had a fucking good time and don't give a rat's ass for some dreary deity or his prissy, prim and proper followers.

Rolleyes

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If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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06-11-2014, 07:16 AM
RE: Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
(06-11-2014 04:35 AM)Tomasia Wrote:  How about teaching children than sex is something you have only with someone that you love, that it should be something seen as meaningful and valued, and not given away just for hedonistic abandonment?

Is it? Can it be both? It seems you're setting up a bit of a false dichotomy.


(06-11-2014 04:35 AM)Tomasia Wrote:  Is that also an unhealthy way to look at it?

Somewhat. It seems you're deliberately painting half the picture. Any time you make decisions with half the information, you're setting yourself up for problems.
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06-11-2014, 07:24 AM
RE: Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
(06-11-2014 05:56 AM)Tomasia Wrote:  Of course churches don't typically teach sex as evil, they teach it as something sacred, to be shared among husbands and wives, and most would suggest it's a thing of beauty, not to be thrown away so easily.
I'm going to make an absolute statement. If after intercourse you are unable to have sex again at some point in the future: You've done it wrong.

Soulless mutants of muscle and intent. There are billions of us; hardy, smart and dangerous. Shaped by millions of years of death. We are the definitive alpha predator. We build monsters of fire and stone. We bottled the sun. We nailed our god to a stick.

In man's struggle against the world, bet on the man.
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06-11-2014, 08:14 AM
RE: Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
Wow this brings back memories of the most traumatically awkward weekend of my life. Story time with Nurse! Get excited!



It was a warm weekend in February of 2000, and I was not quite 15. I was a freshman in high school so innocent I'd never even kissed a boy - just held hands and danced with a few. I was a youth at a large southern baptist church. The adults decided it would be super fun to host a huge Discipleship Now: True Love Waits weekend extravaganza. Everyone was dropped off at church immediately after school on Friday. We did a youth "praise and worship" 2 hour session, ate dinner as a group at the church, and were given t-shirts. Next we were split into grades and genders. There were about 15 girls my age and we all went to the same house to sleep over for the weekend. Yay, let's all talk about the eternal fire hazard of premarital sextivities all weekend with a bunch of prudes!!!


So, we had tons of devotionals all day on Saturday, the youth pastor would stop by and we'd sing about how our lover was Jesus. Gag. I do remember us talking about how oral sex was still sex in the eyes of god - and one of the girls asked "What's oral sex?" The mom leading the devotional cut me off mid sentence as I started to explain "well Cosmo says it's when you go down..." The leader said "Just think of it as kissing. God wants you to save all of you for marriage. How special would it be if the only man you ever kiss is your husband." WTF!?!

On Sunday we all went to church in our super cool True Love Waits t-shirts, apparently that's the only time it's acceptable to not wear your Sunday best dresses for Jesus.

We went back to our small group houses and talked about biblical whores some more. Then Sunday night was the best part:

We got to sit with boys on the right, girls in the middle set of pews, and our parents on the left. They did a big ceremony where we had to sign a pledge with our parents vowing we would remain pure, and that the slut bags were made kinda pure again by Jesus. Then the best part. Daddy gave me a ring from the freaking jewelry store, it was shaped to look like both a cross and TLW as a reminder that my field belonged to my daddy until he gave permission for it to be plowed. He placed it on my left ring finger just like a wedding ceremony. Aaand I got a hug and a kiss and an I'm so proud of you. I wanted to die.


I still have the ring. I never wore it after that night. I'm keeping it now for the rage it inspires.

"If there's a single thing that life teaches us, it's that wishing doesn't make it so." - Lev Grossman
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06-11-2014, 11:41 AM
RE: Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
So wait, this purity ring thing is big in the states? It's not just the reaaaaaaally nutso cults that do it?

Wow... You guys are nuts Big Grin

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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06-11-2014, 12:36 PM
RE: Icky. Purity Ball and this on going virgin culture
Creepy beyond belief.

" Generally speaking, the errors in religion are dangerous; those in philosophy only ridiculous."
David Hume
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