Is it even worth wasting my breath?
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09-12-2014, 04:14 PM
RE: Is it even worth wasting my breath?
(09-12-2014 01:04 PM)LadyWallFlower Wrote:  Here's a draft of my letter to my parents. I've read through it 100 times. I need a fresh perspective. Please feel free to critique or suggest things I should add or delete. Thanks! Smile

Sounds good to me, as a theist, I couldn't find anything annoying, or abrasive about it. It came off kind and sympathetic.
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09-12-2014, 04:29 PM (This post was last modified: 09-12-2014 04:34 PM by dirtstar.)
RE: Is it even worth wasting my breath?
(03-12-2014 01:01 PM)LadyWallFlower Wrote:  [quote]My views aren't divisive. If I had a bad attitude about it then it would be divisive. I'm trying to seek harmony with my family, which honestly is a lost cause, but I want to be able to say I tried.

Okay, I need to bitch for a second here. I'm a little frustrated that someone would think my beliefs are divisive. I'm a pretty easy going person, I like to have a mind of my own but I'm harmonious. Now that I'm an atheist, Christians immediately put me in a box. As soon as I starting coming out, my friends disappeared and most of my family started acting weird around me. My mom seriously doesn't even laugh at my jokes anymore, even though my sense of humor hasn't changed. My sister told me that my views are crazy and stupid. My family looks at me and thinks I'm going through something...they don't think I'm actually a smart, reasonable person. They aren't interested in things I've discovered or what my views are. The only questions they ask are questions to judge me and tell me I'm wrong. I don't feel like I'm taken seriously anymore because I'm not a Christian. I've been told that I should keep my opinions to myself on FB, even though everyone else and their mother can post their religious or political opinions...I wasn't told to keep it to myself when I was an outspoken Christian.
It's not like I talk about atheism all the time- when I do I talk very gently. I listen to what others have to say. I've gone to 3 nephews baby dedications. I never asked anyone to give up god.

Whoever said "You're beliefs are divisive even if you don't want them to be" I disagree with that statement because it sounds like your defending her parents' obligation to remain united despite her beliefs. In the real world vs the religious world, you can have different beliefs based on opinions that are also likely different but still have unity. This is the humane, loving, and respectful way to be. It is the default position before religion.

But therein lies yet one of the many issues with religion. The religious are taught to be divisive. The 'ole "Actions speak louder than words" idiom comes to mind since they preach about not being divisive. Christians pride themselves with the idea that the Christian way is forgiving and being non-judgmental yet LadyWallFlower has demonstrated by describing the indifferent behavior towards her since her revelation as their actions are speaking everything they think of her... right now. This is where the divisiveness error is occurring, not by her beliefs but in fact by their beliefs AND their actions are revealing. The fact of the matter is that her behavior towards them has not changed through her de-conversion process while theirs has. Just more proof as if any was needed that religion is divisive in nature.

LadyWallFlower there's way more good news than bad despite the alienation going on. First of all they are simply trying to pressure you. This is a natural response and it's temporary. They're hoping you'll feel the "hate" so to speak and change your mind by coming back to the pack. They're not having meetings necessarily to discuss handling it this way, this is an innate natural response pack thing that all of us have inherited from way down the line. It's an immature response no doubt. In the end they'll figure out that you have been brave and admirable despite their initial feelings on the matter. If you stay strong but continue to love & respect them and their beliefs despite the differences, you will show them the way. Unfortunately they have to sift through the religious garbage in their minds to get there.

I speak from experience.
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09-12-2014, 04:44 PM
Re: Is it even worth wasting my breath?
You have definitely earned the "Lady" part of your username.

You have my respect.
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10-12-2014, 06:20 AM
RE: Is it even worth wasting my breath?
Thank you everyone! It is much appreciated! I did some more editing last night, so I think I'm ready to send it. I'm nervous about how it will be taken. Confused

"Most people are other people.
Their thoughts are someone else's opinions,
their lives a mimicry,
their passions a quotation."
-Oscar Wilde
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