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18-03-2013, 11:18 AM
Issues Update
So those of you who read my http://www.thethinkingatheist.com/forum/...-Self-Harm thread, may be interested in reading this also.

My boyfriend's father came over on Friday night, while I was away and talked to my dad about a lot of things I've been struggling with.
I never told his father, but he read about everything in James' facebook messages.
He talked to my dad about my self-harm, about my "woods incident", and a few other things.

It opened my dad's eyes, as well as mine, to seeing what is truly wrong with me.

Things are beginning to get a bit better and the abuse has stopped completely.
My self-harm is still going on, but it is nowhere near as bad as it used to be, months ago.

I have a "daddy-daughter date" this coming week and he's beginning to actually hear me out and value my opinion for the first time in about 7 years.
I'm hoping that things will continue to get better and I'll keep you guys up to date, if you would like me to.

"You don't disappoint me.... I think your much braver than you may believe."
bemore

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18-03-2013, 11:25 AM
RE: Issues Update
That's awesome. I'm glad to hear things are looking up.

Now just quit hurting yourself. Just quit. Knock it off. Forever. It's that simple - just stop doing it.

(OK, I get it, it's not really that simple, but in some ways, it really is that simple; yes, I know that's circular logic but that's beside the point).

In any case, I'm happy for you. Don't wreck it. Don't let your past, or your self-esteem, or anything else, take away this chance at happiness - grab onto your happiness and hold onto it with both hands and never let it go. You deserve it.

"Whores perform the same function as priests, but far more thoroughly." - Robert A. Heinlein
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18-03-2013, 11:48 AM
RE: Issues Update
(18-03-2013 11:25 AM)Aseptic Skeptic Wrote:  That's awesome. I'm glad to hear things are looking up.

Now just quit hurting yourself. Just quit. Knock it off. Forever. It's that simple - just stop doing it.

(OK, I get it, it's not really that simple, but in some ways, it really is that simple; yes, I know that's circular logic but that's beside the point).

In any case, I'm happy for you. Don't wreck it. Don't let your past, or your self-esteem, or anything else, take away this chance at happiness - grab onto your happiness and hold onto it with both hands and never let it go. You deserve it.
Thank you.

And I am trying to stop.
The cutting has mostly stopped, but the binge-purge thing isn't that simple to quit.

"You don't disappoint me.... I think your much braver than you may believe."
bemore

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18-03-2013, 12:17 PM
RE: Issues Update
(18-03-2013 11:18 AM)legendoflink Wrote:  It opened my dad's eyes, as well as mine, to seeing what is truly wrong with has been done to me.
There's nothing wrong with you, there is something wrong with what was done to you. That's a very important distinction to make.

The reason you're not harming yourself as much now is that there isn't as much harm being done to you by others and, the threat of harm seems to have lessened. That's good but, it's still critical that you continue in therapy. What's been done to you can not be undone in a matter of weeks or months.

The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names. - Chinese Proverb
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18-03-2013, 12:47 PM
RE: Issues Update
Nice going Link Smile All the best with the recovery process Smile
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18-03-2013, 03:28 PM
RE: Issues Update
(18-03-2013 11:18 AM)legendoflink Wrote:  So those of you who read my http://www.thethinkingatheist.com/forum/...-Self-Harm thread, may be interested in reading this also.

My boyfriend's father came over on Friday night, while I was away and talked to my dad about a lot of things I've been struggling with.
I never told his father, but he read about everything in James' facebook messages.
He talked to my dad about my self-harm, about my "woods incident", and a few other things.

It opened my dad's eyes, as well as mine, to seeing what is truly wrong with me.

Things are beginning to get a bit better and the abuse has stopped completely.
My self-harm is still going on, but it is nowhere near as bad as it used to be, months ago.

I have a "daddy-daughter date" this coming week and he's beginning to actually hear me out and value my opinion for the first time in about 7 years.
I'm hoping that things will continue to get better and I'll keep you guys up to date, if you would like me to.
Great steps taken. Your boyfriend's father gets lots of props. Do keep us updated.


I have no clue if this will work for you but I do something similar for other reasons: Come up with a saying such as "I'm terrific" and ingrain it in your head that anytime you say this you must stop anything you're doing to hurt yourself and wait 1 hour.

Good luck

Throughout history conversions happen at the point of a sword, deconversions at the point of a pen - FC

I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkey's. - Mark Twain in Eruption
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18-03-2013, 04:06 PM
RE: Issues Update
All the best with the recovery process. I used to cut all the time. I've been in recovery for almost exactly one year. It is possible. Lately, though, I've been tempted to pick it up again.

Keep your rosaries out of my ovaries, and your theology out of my biology.
"If you could reason with religious people, there would be no religious people." --Dr. House
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19-03-2013, 11:14 AM
RE: Issues Update
During Spring Break, I plan on bringing James over and us clearing out my stash of tools to hurt myself with.
I would do it by myself, but I want him to know that he has helped me through this as much as anyone else.
We are going to bury them in my backyard and hopefully that will begin the recovery process.

It's been a full week today, that I have been "cut-free".
With my boyfriend and actually ex-boyfriend's girlfriend telling me that they are proud of me, just for that one week, makes me happy.

I can do this.
I will do this.

"You don't disappoint me.... I think your much braver than you may believe."
bemore

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20-03-2013, 02:47 PM (This post was last modified: 20-03-2013 03:02 PM by yumeji.)
RE: Issues Update
Quote:During Spring Break, I plan on bringing James over and us clearing out my stash of tools to hurt myself with.
I would do it by myself, but I want him to know that he has helped me through this as much as anyone else.
We are going to bury them in my backyard and hopefully that will begin the recovery process.
This is a great idea, and I am thankful to you for sharing this idea with all of us here.

Quote:It's been a full week today, that I have been "cut-free".
With my boyfriend and actually ex-boyfriend's girlfriend telling me that they are proud of me, just for that one week, makes me happy.
Congratulations on this achievement! For me, it was the first week or two that were the hardest. That was just my experience though.

Quote:I can do this.
I will do this.
Yes you can! You got this. Big Grin

I can't express how great it is to see the progress you have made. It is nice to see the positive people, who care about you, showing their pride for your progress. Including those of us here.

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21-03-2013, 11:13 AM
RE: Issues Update
Sadly, due to some issues that I have with myself, I self-harmed two nights ago.
Saturday, me and James are taking my tools out to be buried.
Maybe not having them will help me.
Who knows.

I love you guys.

"You don't disappoint me.... I think your much braver than you may believe."
bemore

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