It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
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17-06-2011, 08:32 AM
It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
I will get this started....

" We have a little sister, and she hath no breasts: what shall we do for our sister in the day when she shall be spoken for? If she be a wall, we will build upon her a palace of silver: and if she be a door, we will inclose her with boards of cedar." Song of Solomon 8:8-9

“We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone.” Orson Welles
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17-06-2011, 09:09 AM
RE: It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
(17-06-2011 08:32 AM)myst32 Wrote:  I will get this started....

" We have a little sister, and she hath no breasts: what shall we do for our sister in the day when she shall be spoken for? If she be a wall, we will build upon her a palace of silver: and if she be a door, we will inclose her with boards of cedar." Song of Solomon 8:8-9

um... wow. we do this even now. great are the houses of silicone and saline!

be well.
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17-06-2011, 09:17 AM
RE: It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
Lev. 11:13, 19 And these are they which ye shall have in abomination among the fowls...And the stork, the heron after her kind, and the lapwing, and the bat.

This verse is the turning point of my faith. I started questioning the Bible and ultimately the religion after that ):

Welcome to science. You're gonna like it here - Phil Plait

Have you ever tried taking a comfort blanket away from a small child? - DLJ
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17-06-2011, 09:20 AM (This post was last modified: 17-06-2011 09:29 AM by myst32.)
RE: It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
(17-06-2011 09:17 AM)robotworld Wrote:  Lev. 11:13, 19 And these are they which ye shall have in abomination among the fowls...And the stork, the heron after her kind, and the lapwing, and the bat.

This verse is the turning point of my faith. I started questioning the Bible and ultimately the religion after that ):

Yeah Bat, Eagle, and Vulture sells surly plummeted after this decree.... sucks.. I hear they taste like chicken.

“We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone.” Orson Welles
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17-06-2011, 10:00 AM
RE: It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
1 Samuel 18:25-27

Quote:Then Saul said, “Thus shall you say to David, ‘The king desires no bride-price except a hundred foreskins of the Philistines, that he may be avenged of the king’s enemies.’” Now Saul thought to make David fall by the hand of the Philistines. And when his servants told David these words, it pleased David well to be the king’s son-in-law. Before the time had expired, David arose and went, along with his men, and killed two hundred of the Philistines. And David brought their foreskins, which were given in full number to the king, that he might become the king’s son-in-law. And Saul gave him his daughter Michal for a wife.


Why? Huh scalps and ears, okay, but foreskins? If I wanted my son-in-law to prove himself worthy, I certainly wouldn't ask him to touch 200 dicks Tongue

"Infinitus est numerus stultorum." (The number of fools is infinite)
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17-06-2011, 10:07 AM
RE: It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
2Kings 10:18-10:28 Nice story, little long but worth reading.

Quote:Jehu gathered all the people together, and said to them, “Ahab served Baal a little; but Jehu will serve him much. 10:19 Now therefore call to me all the prophets of Baal, all of his worshippers, and all of his priests. Let none be absent; for I have a great sacrifice to Baal. Whoever is absent, he shall not live.” But Jehu did it in subtlety, intending that he might destroy the worshippers of Baal.

10:20 Jehu said, “Sanctify a solemn assembly for Baal!”

They proclaimed it. 10:21 Jehu sent through all Israel; and all the worshippers of Baal came, so that there was not a man left that didn’t come. They came into the house of Baal; and the house of Baal was filled from one end to another. 10:22 He said to him who was over the vestry, “Bring out robes for all the worshippers of Baal!”

He brought robes out to them. 10:23 Jehu went with Jehonadab the son of Rechab into the house of Baal. Then he said to the worshippers of Baal, “Search, and look that there are here with you none of the servants of Yahweh, but the worshippers of Baal only.”

10:24 They went in to offer sacrifices and burnt offerings. Now Jehu had appointed him eighty men outside, and said, “If any of the men whom I bring into your hands escape, he who lets him go, his life shall be for the life of him.”

10:25 It happened, as soon as he had made an end of offering the burnt offering, that Jehu said to the guard and to the captains, “Go in, and kill them! Let none escape.” They struck them with the edge of the sword; and the guard and the captains cast them out, and went to the city of the house of Baal. 10:26 They brought out the pillars that were in the house of Baal, and burned them. 10:27 They broke down the pillar of Baal, and broke down the house of Baal, and made it a latrine, to this day. 10:28 Thus Jehu destroyed Baal out of Israel.

..."we can be truly free - not because we can rebel against the the tyranny of the selfish replicators but because we know that there is no one to rebel."
Susan Blackmore : The Meme Machine
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17-06-2011, 10:16 AM
RE: It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
in my youth, i enjoyed: Romans 6:22 "But now having been set free from sin, and having become slaves of God, you have your fruit to holiness, and the end, everlasting life."
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17-06-2011, 10:45 AM
RE: It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
My favorite was always the Tower of Babel:
Genesis 11:1-9
Quote: Now the whole world had one language and a common speech. As people moved eastward, they found a plain in Shinar and settled there. They said to each other, “Come, let’s make bricks and bake them thoroughly.” They used brick instead of stone, and tar for mortar. Then they said, “Come, let us build ourselves a city, with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves; otherwise we will be scattered over the face of the whole earth.”

But the LORD came down to see the city and the tower the people were building. The LORD said, “If as one people speaking the same language they have begun to do this, then nothing they plan to do will be impossible for them. Come, let us go down and confuse their language so they will not understand each other.”

So the LORD scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city. That is why it was called Babel—because there the LORD confused the language of the whole world. From there the LORD scattered them over the face of the whole earth.

This was the verse that started my deconversion. It showed me how God feared a united mankind, so he set out to keep us divided so we couldn't challenge him.

Of all the ideas put forth by science, it is the principle of Superposition that can undo any power of the gods. For the accumulation of smaller actions has the ability to create, destroy, and move the world.

"I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul." -W. E. Henley
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17-06-2011, 10:52 AM
RE: It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
One? Dear god, how do I choose just one? I started searching for the one that I thought I wanted, but then I read this:

Genesis 15:4]
[God talking to Abraham about his childless state]
And, behold, the word of the Lord came unto him, saying, This shall not be thine heir; but he that shall come forth out of thine own bowels shall be thine heir.
[/quote]

Yes, this is from the KJV. Either translations have played hell on the Bible, or God has forgotten where babies come from. Anyway, to the verse I originally wanted.

[quote=Genesis 17:23 Wrote:
And Abraham took Ishmael his son, and all that were born in his house, and all that were bought with his money, every male among the men of Abraham's house; and circumcised the flesh of their foreskin in the selfsame day, as God had said unto him.

Just picture this scene playing out in your head. Dad/master comes home, pulls out a knife, and tells all the males to drop their pants. I mean, there must have been some complaints, some struggle, someone had to have said "Let's think about this for a second". I know not all of the slaves just said okay and rolled over. There must have been force used, people held down while Abraham pulled out the knife, women staring wide-eyed in the sidelines, hoping frantically that this will just be a boy-thing, fully grown men crying as an old man hearing voices in his head removes part of their penis with a blunt and dirty knife, all the while God nodding in pleasure.

I don't believe Jesus is the son of God until I see the long form birth certificate!
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17-06-2011, 11:06 AM
RE: It's Friday!! Post your favorite crazy Bible quote!!
Genesis 1: 28 God blessed the people. And he said, ‘Have a large family and produce many descendants. Live everywhere on the earth and rule over it. Rule over the fish that are in the sea. Rule over the birds that fly in the air. And rule over all creatures that live on the earth.’

That's all it took to tell me this book was bunk. I can't stand self righteousness.

I might find an actually silly one to me later, but I don't keep bible verses in my memory.

I'm not a non believer, I believe in the possibility of anything. I just don't let the actuality of something be determined by a 3rd party.
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