It's better to burn out than fade away.
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01-08-2014, 09:26 AM
It's better to burn out than fade away.
“It’s better to burn out than fade away”

I enjoy this quote. It’s appropriate in many different ways. Destiny… change… cannot be stopped. For the last (almost) 3 years I have been a part of this community. I have laughed, raged, argued, cried, and loved with many of you. The year+ that I have served as your admin and the 2+ years I’ve served as one of your mods will forever a part of my life, and it’s a part that I will cherish until the grave.

Irreversible things are continuing to happen to me personally, and I cannot dedicate myself as an admin. Likewise, as many have noticed, I’ve begun to change… these circumstances in my life have affected me… my personality… everything. Made me something I’m not. Made me cynical… negative… combative.

Anyone I offended, I’m sorry. I truly love all of you.

As such, if I cannot be your admin, I cannot be a part of TTA. It’s just the way I’m programed. I have to serve. Once I start, I cannot turn it off like a switch. If I’m forced to turn it off, I have no other choice but to sever the very life of it. Which brings me to this:

For the very first time in my career as admin, I’m abusing my power. I’m doing something that we do not do. Don’t think that any of you will be able to do this in the future because we DO NOT DO THIS. Don’t hold anyone else accountable for this other than me. No one in the FT had any idea that I was doing this; not even my closest friends. This is completely rogue behavior. I want to be very clear about this. Jo… Tim… Marko… Daniel… I hope you can forgive me for doing it.

I’m deleting my account; effectively stamping out any life I have left here on TTA. I hope all of you understand. I hope all of you aren’t too mad at me. I hope all of you can remember and appreciate the great times we had.

This is the only solution I see. If I keep my account and step down, I will eventually return, and I will be unhappy. I will continue to fall into cynism, and I will destroy my reputation of who I REALLY am and not this Frankenstein I’ve become over the past couple of months.

If I ever do return, some may know… maybe… maybe not. There are things in my life I have to accept and deal with before I can even think about joining a community let alone being its leader again.

I wish I could share with all of you what’s in my heart and how I feel about TTA and its residents. But, I don’t know if anyone will fully understand my actions or how I feel when it comes to this… please just accept that I’ve toiled and fought and fought… this is the only way.

I hate “I’m leaving” posts, but I thought I owe it to each and every one of you to at least give a little explanation for my actions. For the past couple of months, I have type this post up a number of times, only to ex it out before I post it. It wasn’t time yet. The time is here, my friends.

So… with that…

I can always be reached at jchill82@gmail.com

I can’t promise a response.

This is apropos… leaving you with a Bible verse:

Ecclesiastes 3:1-15
For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;


Goodbye, TTA.

With love,

KC (Jeremy)

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01-08-2014, 09:38 AM
RE: It's better to burn out than fade away.
I'm gonna miss you brotherman. Be well.




There is only one really serious philosophical question, and that is suicide. -Camus
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01-08-2014, 09:41 AM
RE: It's better to burn out than fade away.
Best of luck in your life Jeremy. I hope you can get a diagnosis on whatever it is causing your health issues and can get stabilized. I'm sorry to see you go but not all that surprised, as you said this has been a long time coming. Drop me a line from time to time you have my info.

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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01-08-2014, 09:43 AM
RE: It's better to burn out than fade away.
I didn't know you too well, but you seemed like a pretty cool guy and were more than welcoming when I first joined the forum and had questions.

Good luck man.
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01-08-2014, 09:45 AM
RE: It's better to burn out than fade away.
"A time to refrain from embracing"... bro. Even chimps know there ain't no such time.

Hug

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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01-08-2014, 09:47 AM
RE: It's better to burn out than fade away.
Wow. I wish you hadn't made such a clean cut - now we will never know how things turn out for you, and we do care. But - you must do what you must do.

Happy trails, and I hope still that some day you'll poke your head in...

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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01-08-2014, 09:51 AM
RE: It's better to burn out than fade away.
Hug retracted. Goddammit. Killing KC means rep lost for everyone he ever repped. Bloody bugger Tongue

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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01-08-2014, 09:52 AM
RE: It's better to burn out than fade away.
Well, that's certainly... what it is.

... this is my signature!
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01-08-2014, 09:54 AM
RE: It's better to burn out than fade away.
Yabut... who are... ?

Gonna miss you, bro.

Shocking

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01-08-2014, 09:59 AM
RE: It's better to burn out than fade away.
[Image: 130454179838.jpg]

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