Just a Joke about Canadian lady
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04-02-2012, 09:00 AM
Just a Joke about Canadian lady
This is excellent ................





A lady Canadian libertarian wrote a lot of letters to the government,complaining about the treatment of captive insurgents (terrorists) being held in Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities.

She received back the following reply:

National Defence Headquarters
MGen George R. Pearkes Bldg, 15 NT
101 Colonel By Drive
Ottawa,ON K1A 0K2
Canada



Dear Concerned Citizen,
Thank you for your recent letter expressing your profound concern of treatment of the Taliban and Al Qaeda terrorists captured by Canadian Forces who were subsequently transferred to the Afghanistan Government and are currently being held by Afghan officials in Afghanistan National correctional System facilities.

Our administration takes these matters seriously and your opinions were heard loud and clear here in Ottawa.

You will be pleased to learn, thanks to the concerns of citizens like yourself; we are creating a new department here at the Department of National Defence, to be called 'Liberals Accept Responsibility for Killers' program, or L.A.R.K. for short.

In accordance with the guidelines of this new program, we have decided to divert one terrorist and place him in your personal care.

Your personal detainee has been selected and is scheduled for transportation under heavily armed guard to your residence in Toronto next Monday.

Ali Mohammed Ahmed bin Mahmud (you can just call him Ahmed) is to be cared for pursuant to the standards you personally demanded in your letter of complaint.

It will likely be necessary for you to hire some assistant caretakers. We will conduct weekly inspections to ensure that your standards of care for Ahmed are commensurate with those you so strongly recommend in your letter.

Although Ahmed is a sociopath and extremely violent, we hope that your sensitivity to what you described as his 'attitudinal problem' will help him overcome these character flaws.

Perhaps you are correct in describing these problems as mere cultural differences.

We understand that you plan to offer counselling and home schooling.

Your adopted terrorist is extremely proficient in hand-to-hand combat and can extinguish human life with such simple items as a pencil or nail clippers.

We advise that you do not ask him to demonstrate these skills at your next yoga group.

He is also expert at making a wide variety of explosive devices from common household products, so you may wish to keep those items locked up, unless (in your opinion) this might offend him.

Ahmed will not wish to interact with you or your daughters (except sexually) since he views females as a subhuman form of property.

This is a particularly sensitive subject for him and he has been known to show violent tendencies around women who fail to comply with the new dress code that he will recommend as more appropriate attire.

I'm sure you will come to enjoy the anonymity offered by the burka over time. Just remember that it is all part of 'respecting his culture and religious beliefs' as described in your letter.

Thanks again for your concern. We truly appreciate it when folks like you keep us informed of the proper way to do our job and care for our fellow man.

You take good care of Ahmed and remember we'll be watching.

Good luck and God bless you.

Cordially,

Gordon O'Connor

Minister of National Defense

I dont know if this is real.
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04-02-2012, 09:32 AM
RE: Just a Joke about Canadian lady
This piece of 'witticism' is the long version of the similarly 'witty' bumper sticker that says: "If you don't want to stand behind the troops, stand in front of them".

It displays not only ignorance of the true facts of the issue, but it also displays a jeering 'fuck you' attitude towards decent people who do know reality and are concerned and angry about them.

It also demonstrates how helpless individual citizens are in the face of organized evil and large-scale apathy and indifference from the majority of western citizens toward the victims of their governments' foreign policy.

I sincerely hope that not many of you found the OP funny in the least. Huh
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04-02-2012, 09:55 AM
RE: Just a Joke about Canadian lady
The "God bless you" at the end is cute. Just the kind of touch our - and your - right-wingers would add to a skewed, hateful and altogether inappropriate communique, wherein they treat both the voters of their own nation and the citizens of foreign countries whom they have no right to molest, with utter disdain.
Typical, yes.
Funny, no.

It's not the mean god I have trouble with - it's the people who worship a mean god.
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04-02-2012, 10:03 AM
Wow, get a grip people ...
It's called satire. Of course it's not real. It is a satirical response to an unrealistic, dewy-eyed liberal's naivete.

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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04-02-2012, 10:20 AM (This post was last modified: 04-02-2012 10:37 AM by Zat.)
RE: Just a Joke about Canadian lady
What many woolly-eyed (and woolly-minded) believers don't realize is that the US army was offering large sums of cash to the Northern Alliance in Afghanistan to 'deliver' terrorist suspects to US custody.

Upon which the Alliance went on a hunt for likely candidates and randomly picked people off the streets and exchanged them for US$.

Most of these 'terrorists' were hauled off to Guantanamo Bay and tortured for years (sorry, 'enhanced-interrogated') and then released without charge as totally ruined, broken men.

To the shame of the Canadian Government, the Canadian contingent did the same: they handed 'suspects' over to the Afghan version of Gestapo for similar treatment. Angry

Actually, to the credit of the not-completely-muzzled-and-corrupted Canadian Democratic System -- it turned into such a huge scandal that the right-wing (damn his soul) Prime Minister was forced to suspend (prorogue) Parliament to avoid any more questions and demands on this subject from the opposition, until the furor died down, as it usually does. Sad
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04-02-2012, 01:08 PM (This post was last modified: 04-02-2012 01:18 PM by Zat.)
RE: Just a Joke about Canadian lady
I find it particularly offensive that the 'joke' is supposed to be about a "Canadian Lady".

Even though we here in Canada have more than our share of brain-washed right-wingers who believe all the militaristic propaganda of a militaristic culture, a lot more of us are aware of actual reality than the 'true believers'.

As the most intelligent and moral of Prime Ministers in Canada, since the seventies, Pierre Elliot Trudeau is on record for opposing the Vietnam War (another US debacle) with these famous words:

Quote:Those who make the conscientious judgment that they must not participate in this war … have my complete sympathy, and indeed our political approach has been to give them access to Canada. Canada should be a refuge from militarism.
– Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau speaking to Mennonite and United Church leaders, 1970 and 1971

... as he was welcoming American draft-dodgers into Canada.

Alas, it has been downhill in Canada, ever since then, as far as governments are concerned, but the people are still the same and still, more or less, sane.
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04-02-2012, 01:18 PM
RE: Just a Joke about Canadian lady
I think the satire makes it's point. While there are major issues around the topic of "terrorist detainees" (aka, generically rounded up suspicious types), there is not an answer as simple as, "Just unlock the doors let them go." The issue is too complex for either extremist right and left wingers to be correct in their remedial answers. I sure don't know the best way to handle this matter, but I sure am not going to be angry because someone presents a satirical viewpoint.

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
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04-02-2012, 01:22 PM
RE: Just a Joke about Canadian lady
(04-02-2012 01:18 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  there is not an answer as simple as, "Just unlock the doors let them go."

How about "innocent until proven guilty?"

How about speedy trials?

How about the UN declaration of human rights?

Do you think it is enough to utter the magic word of "terrorist" and then sink down to the level of the Gestapo? Angry
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04-02-2012, 01:34 PM
RE: Just a Joke about Canadian lady
(04-02-2012 01:22 PM)Zat Wrote:  
(04-02-2012 01:18 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  there is not an answer as simple as, "Just unlock the doors let them go."

How about "innocent until proven guilty?"

How about speedy trials?

How about the UN declaration of human rights?

Do you think it is enough to utter the magic word of "terrorist" and then sink down to the level of the Gestapo? Angry

Oh, ok, you're right. Using the magic word of "Gestapo" convinced me.

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
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04-02-2012, 01:34 PM
RE: Just a Joke about Canadian lady
I read about one of those Canadian hand-over guys who was one of the first let go from Gitmo. They finally let him go - after six years!! He was just some schmo off the street.
Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean someone's not after you. Dodgy

I think in the end, I just feel like I'm a secular person who has a skeptical eye toward any extraordinary claim, carefully examining any extraordinary evidence before jumping to conclusions. ~ Eric ~ My friend ... who figured it out.
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