Just came here for a sec to say this.
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30-09-2013, 02:41 PM
Just came here for a sec to say this.
I'm a new member. I was trying to participate in discussions more and more and be a part of all this.

But. I got a job a month ago. I started working as an English teacher at the place I was taught English when I was little. I felt lucky and secure because it was a place I knew and of course, my boss would be my dear teacher who did a great job in teaching me. That said, I was very excited about starting.

I had no idea all this would turn into a nightmare. I had no idea that the kind, attentive and caring teacher I once knew would turn into a monster. I had no idea that she would treat me so differently just because she now pays me. I was extremely lucky to land a job at this place and time, but I feel extremely betrayed.

She has issues. Anger management problems I'd say. She is constantly mad at me and tells me how much I disappoint her, although she makes most of the mistakes. Whenever there's a problem, I'm the one to blame, because I made a couple of mistakes at the beginning (I have acknowledged that I've made mistakes but this is the first time I have ever worked in my life).

I feel like I'm losing my dignity. I'm putting up with extreme stress and sadness (that she causes me to feel) just so that I won't lose this job. She won't stop undermining me, blaming me for things I had nothing to do with and talking to me with an attitude like "I'm more experienced than you so you don't have the right to judge me, I'm always right".

I'm now constantly afraid of making mistakes, terrified to be exact. I'm always scared that she will find something to blame me for, I avoid talking to her for that very reason. I feel miserable and angry every single day. It's impossible for me to leave because I know I will be called "irresponsible". I don't have a choice anyway, getting another job is almost impossible and I don't have any money. Talking logic is not a choice, I tried it and things got worse. I just have to accept that she will never change her mind.

Everyone is telling me that bosses are always like this and that I have to get used to it. I don't know if I can, but at least I've stopped crying every day.

I think about my job every day, all day. I feel I have to think about it all the time so I won't miss something and make a mistake. Although I work 2-4 hours a day, I have no time at all, my thoughts are devoted to not making mistakes. It is the most (emotionally) tiring thing I've ever experienced. Although I know I'm right and she's wrong, I can't stop being affected by all she says.

And all this, just to say that I wish I could be more active here, I really like this place. Well, and maybe for some compassion too Sadcryface

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30-09-2013, 02:55 PM
RE: Just came here for a sec to say this.
Hug

But now I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

~ Umberto Eco
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30-09-2013, 03:05 PM
RE: Just came here for a sec to say this.
Sorry the job has turned out to be so bad (the boss anyway).

Feel free to vent here Smile

" Generally speaking, the errors in religion are dangerous; those in philosophy only ridiculous."
David Hume
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30-09-2013, 03:13 PM
RE: Just came here for a sec to say this.
hitting others to bring the best of them is a lie, a kind of invention meant to justify powers of negative livings over positive right of ones

superiority is objective and objective is one reality of everything so never anyone and not related to subjects values

that is why inferior subjects wills keep willing to take advantage of some truths known such as this, to mean then the superiority of negative beings over positive ones when subjects doesnt matter objectively and their true value is free so never seen or to know
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30-09-2013, 03:15 PM
RE: Just came here for a sec to say this.
Sounds like your boss is nothing but a bully.

I'm sure there is someone above them you could go to in order to talk about it and work it out. In education systems there usually is. You have to be at the top of your game in order to meet the needs of the people you teach, so the way she treats you isn't fair on them or you. Karate chop that bitch!

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30-09-2013, 03:21 PM
RE: Just came here for a sec to say this.
A lot of entry positions have such issues.

Probably that is what caused David Brinkley to say: "A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him."

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30-09-2013, 03:22 PM
RE: Just came here for a sec to say this.
She is a sad little woman who is queen of her tiny world and she's going to rule it with an iron first. I've encountered people like this; I even worked for one. He was our department head, and had immediate authority over all three of us. Everything had to be done his way with no exceptions. As a critical thinker, I tend to analyze everything and try to find more efficient ways to achieve identical results. He took great exception to this.

I confronted him regarding the appropriate means of expressing and implement new ideas to help the department. He said that there was no such means; everything is done his way. I went over his head to his boss. Halfway through our meeting he was brought in and my concerns were addressed. It was beautiful to watch him squirm.

I chose to leave a month or so later, but during that time... he was more receptive.

If you feel like this queen bitch's superior might be receptive, consider talking with them. If not, you know that you can vent in this forum every day.

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30-09-2013, 03:37 PM
RE: Just came here for a sec to say this.
Hug

Who are these everybody? Are they fellow employees? Is there anyone higher up the chain of command which you can go to and report her behavior to? Are there better people whom you can talk to who can help you navigate through this who aren't part of the "Everybody" category?

I do not think you're in the right employment but considering the economy, it's probably best to micro manage the situation. Check the codes within your area to see if there's enough within to make a case against her to present to those who are up there in seniority. If she berates you only verbally, then probably will want to get evidence for this. If it happens that you get some of these messages via email or by notes, keep them. You'll need them as proof of her actions. If she's berating you in the teachers lounge set a limit to how she interacts with you. Maybe get it so that if she has any issues with your performance, that you will only take it in email format, sent at the end of the day. Give some bullshit explanation as to why. Check to see the reasons of why the last person under her employ was either sacked or left, as well as how many in the last decade had to leave her employ, and for what reasons.

If any suggestion doesn't work with you, don't use it. I can't guarantee any amount of success in any of what I've suggested. I just want you to know that I hear you, I empathize and hope something can be done to resolve this.

Employment can be a difficult thing if you have a boss who's a bitch. Be better than her, and look out for yourself.

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30-09-2013, 03:49 PM
RE: Just came here for a sec to say this.
I've had similar issues with bosses before, and the best I can say is that these things often improve with time. Work hard, be respectful, and stay positive. After you're there a while hopefully you will earn some respect and be treated a little better by her.

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who has said it- not even if I have said it- unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense. - Buddha
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30-09-2013, 03:56 PM
RE: Just came here for a sec to say this.
If you are doing your job and your boss feels it is not good enough, perhaps you should ask why she has not fired you.
(30-09-2013 02:41 PM)undergroundp Wrote:  It's impossible for me to leave because I know I will be called "irresponsible".

Actually, leaving might be the most responsible thing you could do for your health and wellbeing and all concerned. If your boss has made it clear that you are not working out, don't waste their time or yours. Since you said this is your first job experience, decide right now to get further experience elsewhere. Your boss should be overjoyed.

If you only work 2-4 hours a day, use the rest of the day to hunt for a new job. Get anything you can find. If that doesn't work out, get something else. Don't be afraid to sweep some floors in a library... it might be less stressful and you never know where it might lead.

You are looking for experience and so far, the only experience you are getting from this boss is negative. She sounds like a total bitch typicalshitty boss. Undecided


Good luck with your search for a more positive experience. Thumbsup

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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