Just had a nightmare...
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01-05-2015, 01:59 PM (This post was last modified: 01-05-2015 02:17 PM by GenericBox.)
Just had a nightmare...
Not really a thread of any consequence - just me using this as a forum to clear my head as its one of the only places where I can find psuedo-anonymity, plus, one of the few places where my Mum is likely to read this.. (unless...?)

But anyway, just had a nightmare about dying. I know we've had/there is a thread about fear of death elsewhere -- but I am afraid as !@#$ of dying - and more specifically dying soon.

Just some contextual info: I'm 26 and was diagnosed with heart disease at 20 after I dropped dead at a train station (sudden cardiac death). It was going unthoughtof until last year I proceeded to drop dead a further 7 times, and, well, it's not getting any better we can say that. Last year they threw around the transplant word -- haven't told my mum yet.

So anyway, especially after last year -- it's been on my mind alot.

But so in this dream, I was in a dream (I know, inception right?).

I was on a beach (in a dream within my dream) -- really serene, peaceful beach - stars out - palm tree (kind of like the beach from Contact now I'm thinking of it) -- and every night I was going down and walking along it.

The dream (the actual one) kept going in this cycle: I would go about my day completely normally (and really quickly), but then at night I would go to sleep and be on a beach.

Then (in the dream within my dream) my best friend joins me on the beach and we start remembering good times and discussing things every night. The conversation starts on about his old dog, his new puppy and death in general.

Over several "nights" (within the dream) he starts saying how we have no choice and we'll all die soon -- and that I won't feel anything and it'll just happen.

Anyway the dream was in this cycle for a while when my friends Dad joins my dream within a dream on the beach -- we talk about death and he tells my friend that it's time for them to leave. So they start heading off (dream within a dream) and I try and wake up -- but I can't.

I'm not waking up from my dream within a dream and I'm getting more and more panicked that I can't. I can feel my heart hurting and beating hard and fast and I know I was dying and then..

I woke up (in real life) and my heart was actually pounding which makes me freaked out that somehow the dream was tied to something really happening to my heart just now.

Anyway, maybe this can be a thread about nightmares if it helps other people otherwise I just needed to let that out Smile I'm good.
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