Let's write a book together
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17-08-2011, 04:49 PM
RE: Let's write a book together
21) Hovind began to shout some shit about a −300 °F ice meteor hitting the earth causing a flood. Our hero clearly taken aback by the stupidity he was hearing counter attacked with logical arguments based on empirical evidence. But Hovind was immune to these attacks by placing his fingers in his ears and reciting the ancient spell of "lalala I can't hear you I'm right your wrong lalala", all hope seemed lost when suddenly.

Behold the power of the force!
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17-08-2011, 04:59 PM
RE: Let's write a book together
So while Hovind's hands were busy being stuck over his ears, our hero kicked him square in the nuts: after all, he was an atheist and not bound by the biblical Commandment "Thou shall not kick fundies in the nuts".

English is not my first language. If you think I am being mean, ask me. It could be just a wording problem.
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18-08-2011, 12:19 AM
RE: Let's write a book together
After seeing this, this first group of christians stepped aside allowing his passage while they were still able to "Be fruitful and multiply".

Oxymoron: "Religious teaching"
"Simple common sense goes out the window when religion comes in through the door." Me (Blasphemy Fan )
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18-08-2011, 12:27 AM
RE: Let's write a book together
24: After this encounter, our hero reached the city of Nog after 5 days of marching, only to realize the place was entirely inhabited by Elvis imitators.

"Infinitus est numerus stultorum." (The number of fools is infinite)
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18-08-2011, 02:03 AM
RE: Let's write a book together
25: Our hero pulls the boombox out of his backpack and connects the ipod2 headphone output to the boom-box. Being cheap mass produced Apple rubbish the iPod2 GUI locks up and starts playing a Justin Bieber song on infinite repeat at maximum volume. Over 300 Elvis Impersonators surround him angrily.

“Forget Jesus, the stars died so you could be born.” - Lawrence M. Krauss
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18-08-2011, 02:14 AM
RE: Let's write a book together
The impersonators begin to stone him, but not in the biblical sense if you catch my drift.

Fight the system,

~~~but don't mute the opposition!~~~
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18-08-2011, 02:21 AM
RE: Let's write a book together
27. Overwhelmed by the toxic yet seemingly pleasant gas, our hero has, for no reason, unlocked his latent superpowers secretly granted to him by the FBI - THE POWER OF PUNCHING SOMETHING AND SETTING IT ON FIRE SIMULTANEOUSLY!

Welcome to science. You're gonna like it here - Phil Plait

Have you ever tried taking a comfort blanket away from a small child? - DLJ
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18-08-2011, 10:13 AM
RE: Let's write a book together
He wanted to use his super powers but he was afraid to use it against the elvish pointy ears and bows.

Oh wait...
You mean Elvis "the king"... like never mind then...

Observer

Agnostic atheist
Secular humanist
Emotional rationalist
Disclaimer: Don’t mix the personal opinion above with the absolute and objective truth. Remember to think for yourself. Thank you.
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18-08-2011, 10:41 AM
RE: Let's write a book together
The unholy fumes started to make everybody hungry so the people of Nog gathered their eggs, and made egg Nog.

English is not my first language. If you think I am being mean, ask me. It could be just a wording problem.
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18-08-2011, 11:52 AM
RE: Let's write a book together
30) While mellowing out, Monty showed them his copy of Mars Attacks, and they were much taken by the ending.

If you pray to anything, you're prey to anything.
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