Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
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19-12-2016, 11:35 AM
RE: Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
Reposting this because ... just because. Hug

Letting Go.

This is life
A day at the beach.

Rolling sounds
Tickling sands
Whispering air
The sun yawns and blushes.

Generations have played, play still
on this bleached bronze sand.


They are all there
tethered by invisible ropes.

Chloe, carefree, carelessly
cratering nature's grand design
sand-signing
sand-mining:
I Heart grandma

Mom
Dad
relaxed and alert
fussing
lotioning
motioning "off the waves!"
waving off the wasps
staving off the sun stroke
from Chloe and grandma.

And grandma has found a place to rest
Beechwood beach wood
A driftwood raft

"A sandwich?"
"I'm alright, dear."

"Is she safe there?"
"She'll be fine
she's holding the rope."

Time and ocean
motion the driftwood
shuffle the sand
from rough to smooth
from large to small
from age to age.

Grandma's eyes close.

She drifts.

"Mom?"
"Yes dear?"

"Why did grandma let go of her rope?"


"Because darling ...

because she was ready."



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19-12-2016, 11:42 AM (This post was last modified: 19-12-2016 01:13 PM by GirlyMan.)
RE: Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
It's kinda like this ...




and then this ....




and this.




and finally this.




Hineni, hineni.

#sigh
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20-12-2016, 05:49 PM
RE: Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
Oh moms...
It sounds a bit like my great grand mother.
When I was about 7 or 6 years old, we would sometimes go visit her. And she was fit. She would talk and make tea and give me cookies and show me things.
But at some point (and as a child I just missed what happened in the middle), she lived with my grand parents.
They told me of things that happened and they explained to me that she had Alzheimers and this is what happens when people have Alheimers.
Sometimes just little accidents at home, sometimes she ran because she thought the SS was chasing her, sometimes she just enjoyed to eat from an empty plate.
But the good thing in this, she knew and felt that the people around her loved her and cared for her. The more she drifted, the calmer and happier she got.

Dementia is a bitch, but don't underestimate the power the love, that a family can give, has.

Also, like Anjele, if you wanna talk, need a shoulder or an ear, let me know.

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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20-12-2016, 06:10 PM
RE: Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
Moms, that was a very accurate description of dementia.
Nine years ago while my own father was suffering, when the raft came back in, it did so as if it had never gone out. Each time the raft went a little farther out and didn't come in as much.
It's a terrible disease, I can only wish you all the very best.
Hug Heart
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20-12-2016, 07:36 PM
RE: Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
I am so sorry about the pain your family is enduring. Dementia is so sad. I know I don't 'know' you, but I will still send you hugs.

"If you don't have a seat at the table, you're probably on the menu."

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21-12-2016, 12:20 PM (This post was last modified: 22-12-2016 03:15 AM by Carlo_The_Bugsmasher_Driver.)
RE: Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
(18-12-2016 11:14 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  I'm struggling to post this. What can I say? I guess I'll go for a slightly cryptic metaphor, that the reader can try to cypher.

I view life in an odd way, go with me on this, I feel life is very much like a giant beach party (California girl), and everyone I've ever known in my life and cared about is there with me. At some point, and no one can be sure when someone finds themselves no longer on the beach, but on a raft very close to the shoreline. We don't know when the raft showed up or when that person got onto it -- maybe it was there all along, buried under the sand and uncovered by the very low tide. It's like it's suddenly there. There's a rope, but we can't fasten it securely enough to any part of the raft and the person on the raft has to hold onto to it.

When my mother in law began having issues this summer and we feared dementia, she was suddenly on the raft, holding onto a long rope. The rope tethered her to us, but we were helpless to secure it better. We hoped that it would be something simple (as her doctors originally thought) and she'd soon rejoin us on the beach. That wasn't meant to be though. When the diagnosis became dire, final, she bravely chose to remain on the raft, keeping her hands on the rope, so she couldn't drift too far from us. The tide would pull her out a little ways and push her back to the shoreline where we all stood.

Now, it seems the tide has gotten her tiny craft, pulling it further out to sea, and it's become unlikely that it will return. The rope is right beside her but she can't hold onto it, eventually it will slip away.

We're left holding onto the other end, wishing we could do more but resigned that we cannot.

Our numbers over the years have diminished and now we worry when the next raft will suddenly appear and who will be on it.

"It’s not that the party is going to end, it’s that we must leave and the party will go on without us." - Christopher Hitchens

I know what you mean. I'm going through that with my own mom. I'm sorry to hear about that. It's a really hard thing to deal with; watching someone lose control of their own faculties and be incapable of caring for themselves is really hard.

I think we all wish the end would come quick - we'd die on the same day we went to the store to buy groceries or came back from a vacation to meet friends and family. But sometimes that's just not the cards we're dealt. And sometimes no words can really express these trials or provide any real comfort or solace.

It's like you said. There's a party going on and you just can't bring them back to it.

So we enjoy the Christmas lights on the houses in our neighborhood or drink a glass of eggnog or feel contempt at a YouTube video of two idiots fighting over an Xbox, blissfully unaware they are squandering the most precious gift of all.

Happy Holidays? What kind of a soggy shit sandwich is this? And I've got three days left to find a gift for my nephew.

"IN THRUST WE TRUST"

"We were conservative Jews and that meant we obeyed God's Commandments until His rules became a royal pain in the ass."

- Joel Chastnoff, The 188th Crybaby Brigade
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21-12-2016, 03:37 PM
RE: Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
Thanks everyone.

I'm struggling.


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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21-12-2016, 04:49 PM
RE: Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
(21-12-2016 03:37 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  Thanks everyone.

I'm struggling.

Just hang in there. Hug Hug

"IN THRUST WE TRUST"

"We were conservative Jews and that meant we obeyed God's Commandments until His rules became a royal pain in the ass."

- Joel Chastnoff, The 188th Crybaby Brigade
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29-12-2016, 03:45 AM
RE: Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
She's gone, we're sad but damn it's been hard so it's peppered with some relief.


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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29-12-2016, 03:47 AM
RE: Life, Death and the Stuff in between it all
(29-12-2016 03:45 AM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  She's gone, we're sad but damn it's been hard so it's peppered with some relief.

I am sorry for the loss...I know this has been a really trying few months for you and your family. Hugs and love. You know where to find me.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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