Little kids cursing
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30-04-2015, 11:05 AM
RE: Little kids cursing
(30-04-2015 08:59 AM)dancefortwo Wrote:  How do you feel about little kids saying "fuck" all the time.

I often see excessive cursing as a lack of impulse control, an inability regulate ones temper.

So I'd likely wonder why are the kids cursing, are they using it to express anger, or aggression, trying to be provocative and push buttons? Is it being used to say something more than what could be said without cursing?

Imagine if our professors, our peer reviewed articles, our presidential speeches and debates, our college textbooks, where littered with profanity, while it might make them bit more interesting, we might doubt the particular temperaments of their authors.
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30-04-2015, 11:26 AM
RE: Little kids cursing
I'd rather hear a kid say "I"d like to fuck him" - rather than "I'd like to kill him" -----

But guess which one is ok to say on TV????


Fucked up, huh??

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30-04-2015, 11:35 AM (This post was last modified: 30-04-2015 11:44 AM by Escape Artist.)
RE: Little kids cursing
My take on it is this. The absolute worst, most hurtful thing anyone has ever said to me was, "You've ruined our reputation in the community." Not a single curse word in there, and yet it was the worst thing that's ever been said to me.

My oldest is soon to be 14 and my youngest just turned 10. I know the oldest one uses swear words and occasionally the youngest will use one, too. I've told them that words, whether they are in this list of words that have been deemed as "bad" or not, can be powerful - in both good ways and bad ways. You can use a word that's on this list as a means of camaraderie (of building someone up) or as a way of tearing someone down. Same as you can non-taboo words. So I don't have a problem with them using them. The words themselves do not hold any power, imo. It's the way you use them that matters.

I've told them that if they use cuss words at school or around people, say, my parents' age, they're likely to get in trouble or at the very least, get a look of disapproval. So it's best to not use them in those contexts. There are areas and situations where it's okay and areas where it's not.

Now, it's *awkward* for me to hear them slip up and cuss around me (because they typically won't, and will catch themselves) but that's all. It's just awkward.

Anyway, just my two cents. This sort of thing is more or less a non-issue for me as a parent. I don't care what words they use. I care how they use them. If they call another kid "stupid" or "idiot" or whatever else, that's a problem. I expect them to respect others' feelings. If, however, say my daughter is joking with a girlfriend and calls her a bitch, I'm not gonna fuss.

Again, it's all in how you use the words.

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30-04-2015, 11:47 AM
RE: Little kids cursing
(30-04-2015 11:35 AM)Escape Artist Wrote:  My take on it is this. The absolute worst, most hurtful thing anyone has ever said to me was, "You've ruined our reputation in the community." Not a single curse word in there, and yet it was the worst thing that's ever been said to me.

My oldest is soon to be 14 and my youngest just turned 10. I know the oldest one uses swear words and occasionally the youngest will use one, too. I've told them that words, whether they are in this list of words that have been deemed as "bad" or not, can be powerful - in both good ways and bad ways. You can use a word that's on this list as a means of camaraderie (of building someone up) or as a way of tearing someone down. Same as you can non-taboo words. So I don't have a problem with them using them. The words themselves do not hold any power, imo. It's the way you use them that matters.

I've told them that if they use cuss words at school or around people, say, my parents' age, they're likely to get in trouble or at the very least, get a look of disapproval. So it's best to not use them in those contexts. There are areas and situations where it's okay and areas where it's not.

Now, it's *awkward* for me to hear them slip up and cuss around me (because they typically won't, and will catch themselves) but that's all. It's just awkward.

Anyway, just my two cents. This sort of thing is more or less a non-issue for me as a parent. I don't care what words they use. I care how they use them. If they call another kid "stupid" or "idiot" or whatever else, that's a problem. I expect them to respect others' feelings. If, however, say my daughter is joking with a girlfriend and calls her a bitch, I'm not gonna fuss.

Again, it's all in how you use the words.

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30-04-2015, 12:13 PM
RE: Little kids cursing
When I was a kid, I watched Little Shop of Horrors. At the end *spoiler alert Audrey 2 is about to blow up. She looks at the camera and said "Ahhh SHIT!" I thought it was the funnest thing ever just that complete realization she was going to die and their was nothing she could do. I ran to tell my father how funny it was recanting the events that had just accrued. When I reached the ahh shit part. I we greeted with the broadside of my fathers hand. My ass was red for the rest of the day.

The next day I told my school friends and asked them what they thought the word meant. They told me it meant poop. I said "I say poop all the time why didn't I get hit when i said that?" My one friend Ahamed said well just don't say fuck. "Fuck? What dose Fuck mean?" my friend said "I don't know. But my father gets REALLY angry whenever I say it." The rest of recess we just ran around saying fuck. Simple because we thought it was funny.

Kids don't know the meaning of the word. Telling them that can't say it will only make them want to say it more.

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30-04-2015, 12:38 PM
RE: Little kids cursing
Here's the thing, the 3 year old little boy was playing basketball, well as much as a 3 year old can play basketball, with the older kids and saying "fuck this basketball" several times, I think because it was too heavy for him to pick up very well. The older kids thought it was hilarious. I was just walking by when I heard this. The little tike probably didn't even know what he was saying but I keep thinking I should have said something to the older kids who were all between 9 and 13 to not encourage the 3 year old to talk like that.

Then I thought, am I a prude? Is it ok for a 3 year old to say "fuck" these days? But he's not my kid so I walked on by and now I'm thinking I'm not only a prude but a cowardly prude at that.

I think I should have said something.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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30-04-2015, 02:03 PM
RE: Little kids cursing
Sometimes it's fun to teach a kid a swear....


Years ago - I was living with a woman who had four sisters. Her youngest sister (Tina) had a daughter about 3 years old - and asked two of the sisters to watch her for "a couple of hours" -- when a couple hours turned into overnight, then the next day --- they decided to get even -- and taught the 3 year old to say "Momma Bitch".....

The kid would say it, they'd laugh, and the kid was off to the races........

"Momma bitch momma bitch momma bitch mommabitchmommabitchmommabitchmommabitch........"

Tina was pissed.

Oh well.... She earned it.

She didn't ask for a babysitter for a while, either...

Big Grin

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The difference between prayer and masturbation - is when a guy is through masturbating - he has something to show for his efforts.
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30-04-2015, 02:23 PM
RE: Little kids cursing
Language is a "living thing" the meaning of words changes with time. When I was a child we where not allowed to use the word "fuck" as my step-dad is English and apparently the word is very bad over there. Here in Denmark it isn't a big deal in part, i guess, because it's an English word we use untranslated. When we became teens we noticed he would sometimes use it. Mostly when we where drinking (so it was in the later teen years i guess.). Today he uses it just as much as us. And no longer correct us nor my daughter when she uses it.

I don't really care much about how my daughter uses cursing. All i do in that regard is to try and teach her different people have different rules. That being how you behave, how you talk, and what kind of humor they have. So she should be mindful of that in given situations.
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30-04-2015, 04:50 PM
RE: Little kids cursing
My dad was well known for having very 'colorful' vocabulary. But as a kid I knew somehow that there were certain words that I heard all the time that I was not to use, particularly within earshot of an adult. My kids kind of grew up the same way, for the most part. They were used to hearing curse words but knew not to use them in conversation with adults. At least till they were older. It was actually quite a while before my son used any words like that when talking to me...he was late-teens and really upset, and rightfully so, about something that had happened at school. I took the context into consideration and didn't mention it or even raise and eyebrow, though I was surprised...maybe more by his anger and frustration and not the words themselves.

Funny story about my oldest when she was about four. She was at my parents' house where she heard every word out there. She was building a tower with the Tupperware and other things from the cabinets. The tower fell and she said 'fuck'. My mother exclaimed - Jenny! Daughter popped herself in the mouth with her hand and looked at mom and said, "I swap (sic) my mouth." My mother laughed till she cried.

I think it's important to teach the level of respect for teachers and such and also it's important for kids to learn a full vocabulary to express their feelings. If one of mine say 'fuck' in conversation, it's nothing to me and wasn't when they were younger (remember mine are all grown). If one of them said, "Fuck you" to me - that's a different thing altogether.

However...if one of them used the word retard, at any point, there was going to be hell to pay from me. I don't tolerate using that word.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

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30-04-2015, 05:00 PM
RE: Little kids cursing
(30-04-2015 04:50 PM)Anjele Wrote:  My dad was well known for having very 'colorful' vocabulary. But as a kid I knew somehow that there were certain words that I heard all the time that I was not to use, particularly within earshot of an adult. My kids kind of grew up the same way, for the most part. They were used to hearing curse words but knew not to use them in conversation with adults. At least till they were older. It was actually quite a while before my son used any words like that when talking to me...he was late-teens and really upset, and rightfully so, about something that had happened at school. I took the context into consideration and didn't mention it or even raise and eyebrow, though I was surprised...maybe more by his anger and frustration and not the words themselves.

Funny story about my oldest when she was about four. She was at my parents' house where she heard every word out there. She was building a tower with the Tupperware and other things from the cabinets. The tower fell and she said 'fuck'. My mother exclaimed - Jenny! Daughter popped herself in the mouth with her hand and looked at mom and said, "I swap (sic) my mouth." My mother laughed till she cried.

I think it's important to teach the level of respect for teachers and such and also it's important for kids to learn a full vocabulary to express their feelings. If one of mine say 'fuck' in conversation, it's nothing to me and wasn't when they were younger (remember mine are all grown). If one of them said, "Fuck you" to me - that's a different thing altogether.

However...if one of them used the word retard, at any point, there was going to be hell to pay from me. I don't tolerate using that word.

We might have a bit of a problem then if we're trying to set the timing on an older car...... "de-advance"?????

hmmmm...

Wink

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The difference between prayer and masturbation - is when a guy is through masturbating - he has something to show for his efforts.
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