Losing Friends
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21-10-2014, 08:33 AM (This post was last modified: 21-10-2014 09:40 AM by 3is.)
Losing Friends
I'll spare you all the wall of text and give you the short version lol


So, I've got a person that I've been friends with since we were freshmen in college, and just recently I told him that I am an atheist. At first things seemed normal after that, but more and more when we have conversations about life he seems to be completely closed minded and stuck in the 50s. It's like I'm just realizing for the first time how ignorant he is as a person. He thinks segregation should be reinstated. And then out of the blue he's accepted the idiotic dogmatic teachings of the nation of islam, and swears that white people are devils. despite the fact that his family has european ancestry. if that wasn't enough, he swears that gay people have an agenda to prostitute everyone's children. naturally, when confronted and put on the spot everything he says is filled with logical fallacies, because it's stupid to be racist or hate another person just for who they sleep with. I don't get it because it seems like he just started these beliefs overnight or some shit. *kanye shrug*

so my biggest question is, how many if any friends did you lose after your views began changing, and what is the proper way to end a friendship that is over 10 years old? I know I can't make anyone see what actually makes sense when they are content to be dogmatic. but I draw the line at racism, gay bashing, or any other stupid bigotry.
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21-10-2014, 08:51 AM
RE: Losing Friends
I just walk away.



I don't return calls, or emails. Just fade away.

If they come to me and specifically ask, then I give an honest answer. In this case, that you don't agree with his stance on many positions and you have tried to reason and understand but cant go along in agreement.

Sometimes people go thru phases. I have bumped into 'old friends' that I hadnt had contact with in many years. And have a few times joked and said "yeah, I don't know what I was thinking back then" Sometimes its in reference to who they married, or other choices they made. I remember a time when I thought I looked good as a red-head, LOL. No I look back at those photos, smh and say wtf?


fading away helps when you bump into them later, there isnt animosity, just a recognition that you went separate ways.

I'm not a bridge burner unless you have really, seriously pissed me off. But even then, I'm more likely to just say "fuck off" and be done with them.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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21-10-2014, 09:43 AM
RE: Losing Friends
I agree, just fade away.

We all change all the time, our opinions and life goals change all the time, and hence friends come and go.

No point in making a big drama out of it.

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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21-10-2014, 09:44 AM
RE: Losing Friends
(21-10-2014 09:43 AM)Dom Wrote:  ...
No point in making a big drama out of it.

Unless it makes you feel better

Thumbsup

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21-10-2014, 09:46 AM
RE: Losing Friends
"Dude, your opinions give me hives. I can't be around you anymore."

Atheism is the only way to truly be free from sin.
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21-10-2014, 09:47 AM
RE: Losing Friends
Sometimes you just grow apart. I've got a friend that I've had for decades (4th grade), she was a brides maid in my wedding. She's different now and so am I. That's all there is.


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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21-10-2014, 10:18 AM
RE: Losing Friends
Quote: I don't get it because it seems like he just started these beliefs overnight or some shit.


How old is this person?

Atheism is NOT a Religion. It's A Personal Relationship With Reality!
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21-10-2014, 01:11 PM
RE: Losing Friends
(21-10-2014 10:18 AM)Minimalist Wrote:  
Quote: I don't get it because it seems like he just started these beliefs overnight or some shit.


How old is this person?

he's 31
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21-10-2014, 01:13 PM
RE: Losing Friends
(21-10-2014 08:51 AM)Bows and Arrows Wrote:  I just walk away.



I don't return calls, or emails. Just fade away.

If they come to me and specifically ask, then I give an honest answer. In this case, that you don't agree with his stance on many positions and you have tried to reason and understand but cant go along in agreement.

Sometimes people go thru phases. I have bumped into 'old friends' that I hadnt had contact with in many years. And have a few times joked and said "yeah, I don't know what I was thinking back then" Sometimes its in reference to who they married, or other choices they made. I remember a time when I thought I looked good as a red-head, LOL. No I look back at those photos, smh and say wtf?


fading away helps when you bump into them later, there isnt animosity, just a recognition that you went separate ways.

I'm not a bridge burner unless you have really, seriously pissed me off. But even then, I'm more likely to just say "fuck off" and be done with them.



yea this is true, I thought about doing it this way too. thanks for your feedback
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21-10-2014, 01:15 PM
RE: Losing Friends
(21-10-2014 09:46 AM)Colourcraze Wrote:  "Dude, your opinions give me hives. I can't be around you anymore."


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