Make fun of your ex-faith
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29-06-2012, 08:09 AM
RE: Make fun of your ex-faith
Anjele that is what I did for my first communion. We had to confess before we were to go to the altar, so I was trying to find something to confess. I had a guinepig and I dropped it from a 5cm height. that is what I confessed lol. I got to say the Our father 6 times. I did not know the whole prayer by heart and told the priest, he said to just say it as far as I can. "our father, amen, our father, amen, our father, amen...." Big Grin

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29-06-2012, 08:12 AM
RE: Make fun of your ex-faith
(29-06-2012 08:09 AM)Leela Wrote:  Anjele that is what I did for my first communion. We had to confess before we were to go to the altar, so I was trying to find something to confess. I had a guinepig and I dropped it from a 5cm height. that is what I confessed lol. I got to say the Our father 6 times. I did not know the whole prayer by heart and told the priest, he said to just say it as far as I can. "our father, amen, our father, amen, our father, amen...." Big Grin


There may be a formula to be derived here! Our Father = xcm +1...I could be wrong.

" Generally speaking, the errors in religion are dangerous; those in philosophy only ridiculous."
David Hume
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30-06-2012, 07:15 PM
RE: Make fun of your ex-faith
Alright, guys. Here I go:

I used to believe the world was younger than age of ten thousand years old. Talk about a mis calculation! ( I know... Lame joke.)

I had the belief that Mary got pregnant by God, to give birth to...God. Thank God I wasn't HIS dad! ( you're going to have to suffer through this Dodgy )


I had the belief that God was three persons in one.... Talk about God's Multi personality disorder (... What am I doing.... No )


I had the belief that Adam probably rode dinosaurs.... I have no joke for this one.............. Weeping ( you're lucky......THIS TIME.)

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30-06-2012, 07:30 PM
RE: Make fun of your ex-faith
(30-06-2012 07:15 PM)Atothetheist Wrote:  I had the belief that Adam probably rode dinosaurs....

Actually ... that's really kind of cool.
If I was Eve... I'd want my own Brontosaurus to ride. That's probably just me, huh? Blush

I think in the end, I just feel like I'm a secular person who has a skeptical eye toward any extraordinary claim, carefully examining any extraordinary evidence before jumping to conclusions. ~ Eric ~ My friend ... who figured it out.
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30-06-2012, 10:02 PM
RE: Make fun of your ex-faith
(30-06-2012 07:30 PM)kim Wrote:  
(30-06-2012 07:15 PM)Atothetheist Wrote:  I had the belief that Adam probably rode dinosaurs....

Actually ... that's really kind of cool.
If I was Eve... I'd want my own Brontosaurus to ride. That's probably just me, huh? Blush
I don't see what the big deal is. Fred and Wilma used all kinds of dinosaurs for household chores and even had one for a pet. Why couldn't Adam and Eve do the same?

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
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01-07-2012, 05:01 AM
RE: Make fun of your ex-faith
(29-06-2012 08:09 AM)Leela Wrote:  Anjele that is what I did for my first communion. We had to confess before we were to go to the altar, so I was trying to find something to confess. I had a guinepig and I dropped it from a 5cm height. that is what I confessed lol. I got to say the Our father 6 times. I did not know the whole prayer by heart and told the priest, he said to just say it as far as I can. "our father, amen, our father, amen, our father, amen...." Big Grin
Lazy priest. Seems like I could easily replace him with a dial-in phone service.

Welcome to Confession service. To confess your sins, press 1. To hear a blessing, press 2.

if 1:
If you killed someone, press 1
If you embezzled money, press 2
If you had a wank, press 3
For all other sins, press 4

Then create a random number generator and give them x numbers of hail marys to say.
Hah! I just made priests redundant.

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03-07-2012, 08:53 AM
RE: Make fun of your ex-faith
I used to believe that two kinds of each species would fit on a single boat and that it's possible to wander around in the desert for 40 years without finding an exit.

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09-07-2012, 03:23 PM
RE: Make fun of your ex-faith
I believed...
I was going to live on paradise earth forever and ever and ever and... 0_o
Knocking on doors made me Superman
A woman's rights was 'right this way!'
The founder of my religion was a man who was right with God
My god had a name that was barely even used anymore
Catholics were the only ones who were close enough to my way of thinking, but still completely off the ball
Playing sports was a bad thing
You should lose your virginity after being married
I'd ridden myself of all pagan beliefs
Armageddon was a GOOD thing
The Earth was only 4000 years old
National Anthems where a time where I had to sit down for my beliefs
Pursuing a career was pointless
Disney was the shit at 14 (not the Pixar collaborative stuff)
Dating was outlawed
Hanging out with anyone outside my religion was a bad thing
Getting the crap beaten out of you by your folks was normal
Masturbation was a sin but no dead relatives were there to see you do it
Ghosts didn't exist, but did in the bible, and they were a dying breed

Look, this could go on and on... I'm gonna take a break now.

CTS
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10-07-2012, 09:40 AM
RE: Make fun of your ex-faith
let me guess, you where Jehova's Witness? Sounds a bit like it

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10-07-2012, 02:21 PM
RE: Make fun of your ex-faith
There are a few dozen other ones I know of that feel similar, but you're right. Thumbsup
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