Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
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05-04-2015, 03:26 AM
Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
This Zombie Jew Day, I'd like to celebrate by continuing the blaspheming I didn't give up for Lent. Evil_monster I'll start.

If Jesus is God,
and God impregnated Mary,
does that make Jesus a motherfucker?

What is your favorite blasphemy?

You can lead a theist to reason, but, you cannot make him think.
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05-04-2015, 03:37 AM
RE: Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
Yahweh is a cunt.

[Image: E3WvRwZ.gif]
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05-04-2015, 03:44 AM
RE: Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
Merry zombie jew day to you too!

Let's all remember the day when a man was horrifically tortured and completely ignore the millions and MILLIONS of other people tortured in either the same way or far FAR worst who never got a holiday because of it!


My Youtube channel if anyone is interested.
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEkRdbq...rLEz-0jEHQ
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05-04-2015, 03:58 AM
RE: Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
My fave way to blaspheme - "Oh, God, don't stop!" Angel
Blush


I say Goddammit quite a bit - it's my second favorite profanity (favorite obviously the ever so versatile "fuck").

Last year I was all guilt ridden grasping for straws trying to hold onto my faith. This year I've really enjoyed calling it Zombie Day and have had quite a bit of fun.

"If there's a single thing that life teaches us, it's that wishing doesn't make it so." - Lev Grossman
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05-04-2015, 04:20 AM
RE: Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
(05-04-2015 03:58 AM)Nurse Wrote:  My fave way to blaspheme - "Oh, God, don't stop!" Angel
Blush

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05-04-2015, 04:30 AM
RE: Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
A story I'd like to see:

It was reported today after exhaustive dna testing on the Shroud of Turin, that the father of Jesus was not the Holy Spirit, but was, instead, a stable boy from Bethlehem, named Mortimer.

Of course, this information calls for the revision of the Gospel accounts of the birth of Jesus and for significant alteration in the basics of the Christian faith.

More to come.

If we believe absurdities, we shall commit atrocities.--Voltaire.

"To argue with a man who has renounced the use and authority of reason is like administering medicine to the dead." --Thomas Paine.
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05-04-2015, 04:41 AM
RE: Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
(05-04-2015 04:30 AM)666wannabe Wrote:  A story I'd like to see:

It was reported today after exhaustive dna testing on the Shroud of Turin, that the father of Jesus was not the Holy Spirit, but was, instead, a stable boy from Bethlehem, named Mortimer.

Of course, this information calls for the revision of the Gospel accounts of the birth of Jesus and for significant alteration in the basics of the Christian faith.

More to come.

Meh, the Shroud of Turin is already a debunked medieval relic.

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05-04-2015, 06:05 AM
RE: Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
(05-04-2015 04:30 AM)666wannabe Wrote:  ...
More to come.

Reminded me of something I wrote a lifetime ago...

A Blasphemous Deed

The young man arrived earlier than expected
but the efficient hotel staff were prepared.

He declared his name to be Ram, from
the line of David, and asked for his room.

The boy led him up the stairs while his donkey
was taken around to the stable at the back.

It was a pleasant evening so he left his room
informing the proprietor that he would be gone
for about an hour and asked for a light meal
to be delivered to his room on his return.

He left the hotel and wandered around
the small town taking in the evening air.

On arriving back at his hotel he saw that the owner
was engaged in conversation with a young couple,
who looked most tired and weary from a long journey.
The owner was sympathetically explaining that he was
fully booked and that they would have to try elsewhere

The couple were explaining that there was nowhere else
and that they would take the smallest of rooms.

The young man could see that the man’s wife
was in a ‘delicate condition’ and so,
in the interest of humanity,
he offered them his room and said he'd sleep in the
stable with his donkey and added that it was not
the first time he had had to do so.

The couple expressed their gratitude and accepted his offer

............And no star appeared
............And no wise men came
............For no prophecy was fulfilled
............And the young man left Bethlehem,
............Thinking that through his deed,
............The world would be
............A better and happier place.

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05-04-2015, 06:28 AM
RE: Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
Having been resurrected 8 times now, Jesus has nothing on me.

I demand you all bow down and give me chocolate. You may call me Lord Box.
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05-04-2015, 06:55 AM
RE: Merry Zombie Jew Day!!! (Blasphemy thread.)
I have removed most of the preachy religious people from my Facebook but recently added my daughter's mother-in-law. This whole week has been nothing but Easter blessing memes from ending up with this one...apparently she really doesn't know her bibble...Facepalm

[img][Image: cross_zpsxi15yjze.png][/img]

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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