Mother who abuses emotionally
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27-03-2013, 09:52 AM
Mother who abuses emotionally
What kind of relationship is this?
http://www.experienceproject.com/stories...se/1337390

I related a lot to her story but couldn't write it better. Somebody has told me that I'm being scapegoated and that my family is schizophrenogenic.
This is really upsetting Sad

"The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason." - Benjamin Franklin
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27-03-2013, 09:59 AM
RE: Mother who abuses emotionally
It's definitely an unstable relationship and the parents in this case are weak. A person that is not strong enough to care for themselves on a daily basis both physically and emotionally should make a conscious decision not to have children. The parents are not schizophrenic (at least not based on the info provided) but they are definitely depressed, possibly bipolar and should not be in charge of molding a young child into a successful, healthy adult. It's a damn shame and I really do feel sorry for people that have to go through this. If a mother is not strong enough to pull herself together long enough to support her children, she is just as abusive as a mother that physically abuses her children.

~Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.~
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27-03-2013, 10:01 AM
RE: Mother who abuses emotionally
[Image: tumblr_m4jbjlYpw31rsslhno1_400.gif]

Sorry, had to be done.

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27-03-2013, 10:03 AM
RE: Mother who abuses emotionally
(27-03-2013 10:01 AM)frankiej Wrote:  [Image: tumblr_m4jbjlYpw31rsslhno1_400.gif]

Sorry, had to be done.

Cute....that's called discipline, not abuse Wink

~Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.~
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27-03-2013, 10:04 AM
RE: Mother who abuses emotionally
(27-03-2013 09:52 AM)Chaos Wrote:  What kind of relationship is this?
http://www.experienceproject.com/stories...se/1337390

I related a lot to her story but couldn't write it better. Somebody has told me that I'm being scapegoated and that my family is schizophrenogenic.
This is really upsetting Sad

Welcome to the club...I was/am the family scapegoat. It pretty much sucks but is better now. Dad and I made a certain peace before he died a few years ago. I do not engage in any interaction with my mother...none...nada...she is poison, to me she is absolutely toxic...I DO NOT love her. I was freed from the need to say I do, I don't. She now tortures my sister but my sister is pretty good now at holding boundaries. My brother is the Golden Child and he tolerates mom's crap because there may be something in it for him one day...as in inhereitance.

Family should mean people who love you and are good to you, blood family doesn't always live up to that.

I'm not anti-social. I'm pro-solitude.
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27-03-2013, 10:31 AM (This post was last modified: 27-03-2013 10:36 AM by Chaos.)
RE: Mother who abuses emotionally
Sorry for not going in too much detail but I feel really tense right now. She behaves very rude with me and bullied me many times. She even didn't give a fuck when I was bullied in school. I understand that she has her own problems but I can't accept this behavior. It's odd that I'm aware that what she does is full of hatred and still think that she loves me - unconsciously. It's making me suicidal. She even told me that she hates me a few times.

Grr.. I feel weird talking about this.

"The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason." - Benjamin Franklin
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27-03-2013, 10:37 AM
RE: Mother who abuses emotionally
(27-03-2013 10:31 AM)Chaos Wrote:  Sorry for not going in too much detail but I feel really tense right now. She behaves very rude with me and bullied me many times. She even didn't give a fuck when I was bullied in school. I understand that she has her own problems but I can't accept this behavior. It's odd that I'm aware that what she does is full of hatred and still think that she loves me - unconsciously. It's making me suicidal. She even told me that she hates me a few times.

That's crazy. And every person deserves better than that. If you don't mind, how old are you? It sounds like your very young (no offense if you're not). I grew up with my father. My mother ran off when I was very young and my father never had time for us. However, I learned that I am not a reflection of my parents. I am my own person and I can be anything in this life that I choose to be. I went from being a high school drop out to a college graduate with three degrees. The only thing I can tell you is not to live your life because of how your mother treated you....succeed in life despite the way your mother treated you.

~Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.~
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27-03-2013, 10:38 AM
RE: Mother who abuses emotionally
How old are you Chaos? Are you still at home?

Not much will fuck with your head more than the realization that your own mother isn't capable of love...but it happens.

Look online for the book "Toxic Parents". It's an old book but is excellent in helping understand that you aren't the cause of havoc and hate in a screwed up family.

Is you mother dealing with mental illness or addiction? That adds another dimension to things.

Take a breath...you can work your way through this, suicide is not the answer. You need to learn to stop being the whipping boy.

I'm not anti-social. I'm pro-solitude.
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27-03-2013, 11:13 AM (This post was last modified: 27-03-2013 11:57 AM by Chaos.)
RE: Mother who abuses emotionally
(27-03-2013 10:37 AM)kellyrm Wrote:  That's crazy. And every person deserves better than that. If you don't mind, how old are you? It sounds like your very young (no offense if you're not). I grew up with my father. My mother ran off when I was very young and my father never had time for us. However, I learned that I am not a reflection of my parents. I am my own person and I can be anything in this life that I choose to be. I went from being a high school drop out to a college graduate with three degrees. The only thing I can tell you is not to live your life because of how your mother treated you....succeed in life despite the way your mother treated you.
I'm 23 years old, maybe I sound younger because I'm not a native english speaker... at least, I hope so. What creeped me out is that I read somewhere that the lack of affection in the early ages, could make a child retarded. And I do feel retarded sometimes, even though I know that I am not. Not intellectually. But many times I can't express my emotions properly, in spite of being a very emotive person. It's so damn frustrating. I think my parents made me be this way. They were always distant with me and my mom never hugged me.

"The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason." - Benjamin Franklin
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27-03-2013, 11:35 AM
RE: Mother who abuses emotionally
(27-03-2013 11:13 AM)Chaos Wrote:  
(27-03-2013 10:37 AM)kellyrm Wrote:  That's crazy. And every person deserves better than that. If you don't mind, how old are you? It sounds like your very young (no offense if you're not). I grew up with my father. My mother ran off when I was very young and my father never had time for us. However, I learned that I am not a reflection of my parents. I am my own person and I can be anything in this life that I choose to be. I went from being a high school drop out to a college graduate with three degrees. The only thing I can tell you is not to live your life because of how your mother treated you....succeed in life despite the way your mother treated you.
I'm 23 years old, maybe I sound younger because I'm not a native english speaker... at least, I hope so. What creeped me out is that I read somewhere that the lack of affection in the early ages, could make a child retarded. And I do feel retarded sometimes, even though I know that I am not. Not intellectually. But many times I can't express my emotions properly, in spite of being a very emotive person. It's so damn frustrating. I think my parents made me be this way. There were always distant with me and my mom never hugged me.

You write just fine.
Emotionally abusive parents can affect your ability to display and to understand emotions.

I'm not anti-social. I'm pro-solitude.
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