Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
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23-02-2016, 11:19 PM
RE: Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
Quote:I just got a Wii U, and want to buy some games - but games a group of people can play together, of different ages/abilities... I already have mario cart, and mario 3D world- any really fun group games for Wii U?

Cool first question a video game question.

Wii sucks, it's for filthy casuals. Get an xbox one or gaming PC and play competitive first person shooting games or complicated highly detailed grand strategy games.
Ditch your friends. That way you're not pressured into buying a Wii U and can focus entirely on your xbox and PC gaming in peace alone.

Quote:Also snacks that almost everyone will eat- people are so picky to feed them takes a lot of work

It's free food, they should be thankful for what they damn well get.
Get what YOU like and if they don't like it well they can go hungry and more for you.

Quote:and tasty mixed easy to make drinks that most people like?

Raro.

Quote:and what is the best expansion pack for games against humanity?

Monopoly. Or Risk.

Quote:and if this is a humor thread, still tell me the stuff above, anyway, but in a funny way

This is not a humor thread, I assure you that I am not a funny person.
Everything I saw is dead serious.

Quote:This would make a good youtube channel idea. I think you would be good at it.

No.

Quote:Dear Miss Muffs,

I don't have a paying job, I don't have a romantic relationship,
I don't have much money, and I live in the boondocks.
What should I do?

Signed,
Country Mouse

Sell crack. You live in the boondocks so no issue of cops. No relationship so no worries about other people ratting you out and it solves your money problems.
You'd make a fantastic Walter White Chas you really would.

Quote:Was going to say the same thing. You could do it anonymously, like wear a mask or something. It would be glorious.

No.

Quote:Wait a damn minute. You are gay? I thought you were, like, asexual or ... something. Because, like, sex interfered with your plans for world domination or ... something?

Asexual/gay. Like if someone who has no interest in cars sees a Ferrari and thinks "that's a nice looking car". But hates cars so...
Like that, but with dick.

Quote:Anyways, I have a sobriety problem that is interfering with my drinking. Can you recommend some good reading material for when my mother-in-law visits?

The Hit Man.

Quote:No, not that either..

You can ask me anything child. *nun-face*

Quote:I want to feel like a good mom. What can I do muffs? Sad

Get rid of your children, than you wont feel like a shitty parent because you wont be a parent. Problem solved.

Quote:So how do I get bloodstains out of my tuxedo --- and where's the best place to find a really good criminal defense attorney??

Cola. Yellow Pages.

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24-02-2016, 12:26 AM
RE: Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
I don't like cleaning up my dogs shit. My neighbour doesn't either. So how do I keep my neighbour from ratting me out to the landlord, but still keep sending the dogs next door to take a shit?

So many cats, so few good recipes.
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24-02-2016, 12:27 AM
RE: Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
(24-02-2016 12:26 AM)Stark Raving Wrote:  I don't like cleaning up my dogs shit. My neighbour doesn't either. So how do I keep my neighbour from ratting me out to the landlord, but still keep sending the dogs next door to take a shit?

Isn't it obvious?

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24-02-2016, 12:44 AM
RE: Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
Dear Madam Earmuffs;

What advice would you give to a young person who aspires to grow up to be a punster?

The people closely associated with the namesake of female canines are suffering from a nondescript form of lunacy.
"Anti-environmentalism is like standing in front of a forest and going 'quick kill them they're coming right for us!'" - Jake Farr-Wharton, The Imaginary Friend Show.
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24-02-2016, 12:51 AM
RE: Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
(24-02-2016 12:27 AM)earmuffs Wrote:  
(24-02-2016 12:26 AM)Stark Raving Wrote:  I don't like cleaning up my dogs shit. My neighbour doesn't either. So how do I keep my neighbour from ratting me out to the landlord, but still keep sending the dogs next door to take a shit?

Isn't it obvious?

Touché.

So many cats, so few good recipes.
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24-02-2016, 06:28 AM
RE: Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
(23-02-2016 11:19 PM)earmuffs Wrote:  
Quote:I just got a Wii U, and want to buy some games - but games a group of people can play together, of different ages/abilities... I already have mario cart, and mario 3D world- any really fun group games for Wii U?

Cool first question a video game question.

Wii sucks, it's for filthy casuals. Get an xbox one or gaming PC and play competitive first person shooting games or complicated highly detailed grand strategy games.
Ditch your friends. That way you're not pressured into buying a Wii U and can focus entirely on your xbox and PC gaming in peace alone.

Quote:Also snacks that almost everyone will eat- people are so picky to feed them takes a lot of work

It's free food, they should be thankful for what they damn well get.
Get what YOU like and if they don't like it well they can go hungry and more for you.

Quote:and tasty mixed easy to make drinks that most people like?

Raro.

Quote:and what is the best expansion pack for games against humanity?

Monopoly. Or Risk.

Quote:and if this is a humor thread, still tell me the stuff above, anyway, but in a funny way

This is not a humor thread, I assure you that I am not a funny person.
Everything I saw is dead serious.

Thank you Muffly dear, you saved my life...I dumped my friends, saved money on snacks, and am stocking up on Raro... decided to purchase an old underground missile silo so I no longer have to be bothered by those pests. I am now waiting for armageddon and decorating the place, by painting on windows, and pretend curtains. What colors go with rusty, dank, spider fillled, swampy and filthy silos? I thought sunny yellow. Thanks again, you are the best,
c.
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24-02-2016, 06:29 AM (This post was last modified: 24-02-2016 10:14 AM by carol.)
RE: Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
was getting error message, must have posted multiple during computer glitch
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24-02-2016, 12:55 PM
RE: Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
(24-02-2016 06:29 AM)carol Wrote:  was getting error message, must have posted multiple during computer glitch

The forum went down for a while, it seems that people who were logged in just before were most affected.

Clearly it's earmuffs fault.

Smartass


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And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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24-02-2016, 03:26 PM (This post was last modified: 25-02-2016 10:17 AM by CleverUsername.)
RE: Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
I made an appointment at my school writing center, then called on that day to make absolutely sure someone would be there at that time, then when I got there no one was there.

How can I express my displeasure in a manner that's civil but still conveys my sincerest "fuck you"s? Consider

Popcorn I put more thought into fiction than theists put into reality.
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24-02-2016, 04:54 PM
RE: Muff's Life Advice Thread 2.0
Dear Muffs,

I want to invest in a 3D printing company. The business is starting to boom, I'm hoping I can still get in early enough to buy stock at a reasonable price and watch it grow.

Which would be the best company to invest in, and where do I go to purchase this stock? I don't want to sign up for one of those broker websites, and I'm far too lazy to research.

Much thanks Heart
Smerc Big Grin

I hope that the world turns, and things get better. But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you. - V for Vendetta
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