My exit strategy.
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25-05-2016, 12:41 PM
RE: My exit strategy.
I remember from the podcast with Ryan Cragun that removing fundies from their environment has been shown to change them, so if your wife is still in fundie mode, the U.U. church might be a good place to start.

http://www.thethinkingatheist.com/podcas...yan-cragun
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25-05-2016, 05:01 PM
!
(23-05-2016 06:48 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  How old are you??

According to his intro, he's 28-ish, living in a small, northern Michigan town.

***
Sounds like things might be moving along. The further one separates from the god idea, the stronger and more confident one seems to become. Keeping tranquility in your life while letting go of the delusion can be a balancing act. A calm, orderly and systematic dismantling of the god-prepared environment and replacing it with one of your own construction, can certainly get the ball rolling in the secular direction.

Just wanting to take these first public steps is big. I'd say you're doing ok so far, Herrozerro. Thumbsup

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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25-05-2016, 05:07 PM
RE: My exit strategy.
(23-05-2016 06:41 PM)herrozerro Wrote:  So I've been pretty closeted ever since I deconverted, but day after day of having to live this lie is wearing on me. I understand probably for the first time the oppression that other closeted demographics face.

I'm trying to put together an exit strategy, I don't think I can just come right out without it being dismissed or attacked as some kind of mid-life crisis. So my idea is to somehow gradually come out of Christianity.

I've already started by forsaking young earth creationism pretty publically and showing myself as more of a liberal. But I'm not sure where to go from here. Does anyone here have any advice as to what might be more liberal or progressive denominations? I figure I can possibly convince my wife to leave our current church for another, there has been a little strife in the church and if I can move us to a less fundamentalist church.

Thanks!

If there is a Unity Church in your area that may be a good step. They believe in God etc... but not the blood and sacrifice and that part of the fantasy. Going there helped to wean me from the whole business.
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25-05-2016, 05:10 PM
RE: My exit strategy.
(23-05-2016 07:40 PM)julep Wrote:  
(23-05-2016 06:41 PM)herrozerro Wrote:  So I've been pretty closeted ever since I deconverted, but day after day of having to live this lie is wearing on me. I understand probably for the first time the oppression that other closeted demographics face.

I'm trying to put together an exit strategy, I don't think I can just come right out without it being dismissed or attacked as some kind of mid-life crisis. So my idea is to somehow gradually come out of Christianity.

I've already started by forsaking young earth creationism pretty publically and showing myself as more of a liberal. But I'm not sure where to go from here. Does anyone here have any advice as to what might be more liberal or progressive denominations? I figure I can possibly convince my wife to leave our current church for another, there has been a little strife in the church and if I can move us to a less fundamentalist church.

Thanks!

Episcopalians and Unitarians are pretty liberal. Episcopalians have great music in their services, but your wife might be uncomfortable with the Catholic trappings, if you have been at a fundie church that thinks Catholics are the debil. There are robes and sometimes incense and a lot of call/response between the priest and congregation.

I sing sometimes at a Universalist Unitarian church, and there is no angry god or hell mentioned, the sermons are short, and they don't really care if you believe in god or not.

Good luck!

One brother of mine once sang at a UU church and he was surprised that they didn't applaud afterwards, just all waved their hands in the air. After the shock he found it enjoyable.
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25-05-2016, 05:47 PM
RE: My exit strategy.
(25-05-2016 05:10 PM)Born Again Pagan Wrote:  
(23-05-2016 07:40 PM)julep Wrote:  Episcopalians and Unitarians are pretty liberal. Episcopalians have great music in their services, but your wife might be uncomfortable with the Catholic trappings, if you have been at a fundie church that thinks Catholics are the debil. There are robes and sometimes incense and a lot of call/response between the priest and congregation.

I sing sometimes at a Universalist Unitarian church, and there is no angry god or hell mentioned, the sermons are short, and they don't really care if you believe in god or not.

Good luck!

One brother of mine once sang at a UU church and he was surprised that they didn't applaud afterwards, just all waved their hands in the air. After the shock he found it enjoyable.

They've always applauded for me. Maybe different habits in different parts of the country?
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