My father died last week
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17-04-2014, 07:28 PM
My father died last week
My father died last week. He was 69. He battled illness for the last several years of his life and suffered a slow decline.

He lived with me, my wife, and our two children. He was a great dad, he was always there for my high school band competitions, in college when I was in the Penn State Blue Band. He always was there for games, and other things. He put me through college. I am lucky. I got through college with no debt thanks to him.

I feel a bit guilty, in the last years I often didn't talk to him as much as I should have, or spent the time with him that I should have. Maybe that is just grief guilt speaking, but I with I had a few more minutes with him.

The words of carl sagan regarding star stuff have been very comforting. The iron in his blood, and calcium in his teeth were all forged in stars and back to stars he will go. The trillions of molecules of oxygen he breathed are dispersed all across the earth, and with every breath I'm sure I breath a molecule of oxygen that he had breathed.

That is strongly reassuring.
The photo is from around 1979.


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17-04-2014, 07:38 PM
RE: My father died last week
I'm so very sorry for you loss Hug it sounds like you've gt a lot of great memories to cherish. I think your feelings of guilt are completely natural, even if you have nothing to feel guilty about. There is never enough time, never enough hugs, never enough "I love you"s. Based on how you've talked about him here, and sharing your home with him, I'm sure he knew that you loved him very much. Were here if you need to vent, be sad, or share more memories. Hug

I hope that the world turns, and things get better. But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you. - V for Vendetta
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17-04-2014, 08:15 PM
RE: My father died last week
I am sorry for the loss. I know this will be a big adjustment for you and your family. Sounds like you dad was a great guy and he raised a great son.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

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17-04-2014, 08:23 PM
RE: My father died last week
My grandpa died 3 years ago because of lung cancer.

My family put him on good healthcare, really prolonged his life (if the ending part of which qualifies as life) and resuscitated him once after his heart stopped. When the drugs are no longer that effective, he was in agony. Not long before he was sent to ICU and came back no more, he was in a coma, yet suddenly he struggled and said "LET ME GO !!!" ...

... I still feel the guilt.

I am sorry for your loss.

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17-04-2014, 08:29 PM
RE: My father died last week
So sorry. My wife lost her mom two weeks ago, so sad. I feel for you.

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17-04-2014, 08:33 PM
RE: My father died last week
My condolences to you and your family too, Willhopp.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

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17-04-2014, 08:36 PM
RE: My father died last week
(17-04-2014 08:29 PM)WillHopp Wrote:  So sorry. My wife lost her mom two weeks ago, so sad. I feel for you.

My condolences.

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17-04-2014, 08:50 PM
RE: My father died last week
I'm very sorry for your loss, Cap, jack Harkness.
I send you the best thoughts.
Also a Hug

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18-04-2014, 01:04 AM
RE: My father died last week
Hug

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18-04-2014, 02:55 AM
RE: My father died last week
Those words of Carl Sagan are very comforting indeed.

Check this out, if you'd like.. I read this a few months ago, and you reminded me of it when you spoke of how he's going back to the stars...

Grief Without Belief;

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ali-a-rizv...34439.html

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