My hangover is enough of a reminder of last night.
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16-12-2012, 10:41 PM
RE: My sex life has become a total bore.
You should take her out, away from the bedroom and sex, and talk to her about it and about how you feel, not a board full of strangers. You might also learn she has thoughts on the matter too, and what they are.

There are sex therapists that can help, too. Sometimes sex levels in a relationship are connected to other things going on- other stressors or relationship issues.

It is never fine to go cheat. You cheat on your wife, you cheat on your kids. Besides being mistrusting to your partner, you show your kids what kind of trust in a relationship is the standard, and cheating is breaking the trust. You show them that's okay and that their future relationships can be this way and it's okay for them to be treated dishonestly. If you want it elsewhere, come clean with the news before and not after- this is honesty.

Is your wife okay with you posting these private details on a public board, especially with people who know her personally here? That can be breaking trust too, if she isn't.
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16-12-2012, 10:51 PM
RE: My sex life has become a total bore.
(16-12-2012 10:37 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  The fuck, Tim? You want some exictment? Go down to Bourbon Street, find a streetwalker and start playing whack a 'ho with her. When her pimp shows up, fuck him in the ass in front of all his whores. There's your fucking excitement. The fuck's wrong with you? ... Be grateful there's a woman even willing to wake up next to your sorry ass. ... The fuck's wrong with you?
Best advice ever. Yes

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16-12-2012, 10:51 PM (This post was last modified: 17-12-2012 06:17 PM by germanyt.)
RE: My sex life has become a total bore.
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“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect.”

-Mark Twain
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16-12-2012, 10:52 PM
RE: My sex life has become a total bore.
What's your relationship outside of the bedroom? If that has become less fulfilling for either of you, then it'll effect your sex lives, too.

You need to be friends and partners to each other...and if that's not how it is, forget about the sex for now---the boredom in bed is a symptom of a larger problem. Work on that, without the hidden agenda of getting laid in the end.

I see your frustration but also echo the previous response of respecting your wife here on the boards. Best wishes, to both of you....

Drinking Beverage Grab a cuppa' joe; sit-n-read my blog for a spell: www.vaweber.wordpress.com
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16-12-2012, 10:53 PM
RE: My sex life has become a total bore.
(16-12-2012 10:51 PM)germanyt Wrote:  
(16-12-2012 10:41 PM)LadyJane Wrote:  Is your wife okay with you posting these private details on a public board, especially with people who know her personally here? That can be breaking trust too, if she isn't.
Of course not. But you guys are my confidants. I choose to have trust and take advice from those I feel would provide the most honest advice.

As for romance. I get that y'all. I wish there was something I could do but I just don't have the opportunities I used to now that my daughter is around all the time. In nearly 3 years my daughter has never stayed over night with a babysitter. My family just doesn't offer. But even if they did I don't think I'd get far.

Truth is that my wife just isn't passionate about anything and I feel like it translates to the bedroom. I have so many interests like football, physics, bodybuilding, nutrition, etc and she really doesn't have those passions.

I'm kinda scared. Divorce bothers me because I love my daughter and I don't want my marriage to end because of sex. That's terrible. I want an exciting marriage. Truth is that I want and exiting wife. One that gives me road head on the fly. One that doesn't constantly condescend me about every fucking thing. I dunno. Maybe there is more to my troubles than just sex.


I think you're on to something there.

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16-12-2012, 10:55 PM (This post was last modified: 17-12-2012 06:17 PM by germanyt.)
RE: My sex life has become a total bore.
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“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect.”

-Mark Twain
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16-12-2012, 10:58 PM (This post was last modified: 17-12-2012 06:18 PM by germanyt.)
RE: My sex life has become a total bore.
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“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect.”

-Mark Twain
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16-12-2012, 10:59 PM
RE: My sex life has become a total bore.
(16-12-2012 10:55 PM)germanyt Wrote:  It just feels that my evolutionary instincts of procreation are kicking in. I know that sounds bad. I just have conflicting ideals.
Procreation, my ass! No disrespect intended but call a spade a spade--it's lust.

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16-12-2012, 11:03 PM
RE: My sex life has become a total bore.
(16-12-2012 10:58 PM)germanyt Wrote:  
(16-12-2012 10:52 PM)Percepticon Wrote:  What's your relationship outside of the bedroom? If that has become less fulfilling for either of you, then it'll effect your sex lives, too.

You need to be friends and partners to each other...and if that's not how it is, forget about the sex for now---the boredom in bed is a symptom of a larger problem. Work on that, without the hidden agenda of getting laid in the end.

I see your frustration but also echo the previous response of respecting your wife here on the boards. Best wishes, to both of you....
I get that last comment. I dont' want to hurt her feelings but there's only so many people I can talk to.

As for other aspects of our lives. I feel like I live in the realm of condescension. Half of my conversations with my wife it seems like are loaded with condescension. If I talk about buying a six pack I get a condescending remark like "Do you really need to stop for that". That's just one bad example but I feel like my whole like is like that some days. Those kinds of remarks where you grit your teeth and ignore only to be asked if she heard you. Ugghhhh...... I just wish we could rewind to 5 years ago. Things seemed so great when I was head over heels.
Then start there---aside from mind-blowing sex, what was different about you then? About her? And what's changed, specifically...? Obviously, having a child did, and that admittedly puts a strain on things; it's a priority shift. Start with what has changed since 5 years ago...

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16-12-2012, 11:08 PM (This post was last modified: 17-12-2012 06:18 PM by germanyt.)
RE: My sex life has become a total bore.
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“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect.”

-Mark Twain
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