My mother's stroke
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02-07-2015, 10:37 AM
My mother's stroke
About seven months ago I posted in the Ranting Corner thread about my mother's wrong cancer diagnosis and her correct stroke diagnosis. God and Padre Pio's hat have still done jack shit to cure her, but still, technically, we've gotten very luck through this whole ordeal. Despite two severe stokes she isn't dead, she can still talk, she's still all there mind-wise, and I'm sure there are millions of people out there who would kill to get a call saying the hospital was wrong about someone they know having cancer.

But it's still a pretty terrible situation, and I hate it.

I just really miss the way everything used to be. Everything involving her is so complicated now, and I keep thinking about how everything was before this happened and how everything would be playing out if everything was normal. Especially since it's kind of an important time right now, since I'm getting ready to leave for college, and involving her in these big important things like orientation day is just so hard.

In fact, I have moving in day coming up in August and I have no idea what we're going to do for that, because I know she wants to come, and I do want her there, but there's just no way she'll do anything but get in the way.

It's not a completely hopeless situation. There's still a chance she will get better. It's only been seven months, and apparently her doctors say there's still a good amount of hope. But it's just really hard to focus on that when things suck so much at the moment.

So I just wanted to get this out to someone. Woke up feeling really terrible (I had a dream where she was okay) and decided to get it off my chest. Maybe I sound whiny, but...

Popcorn I put more thought into fiction than theists put into reality.
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02-07-2015, 12:01 PM
RE: My mother's stroke
Impending stress can blow shit out of proportion and make EVERYTHING seem daunting. Maybe try to focus on what can be accomplished just this moment, only ... and not worry about what may or may not happen later.

It also sounds as if you might need a break from "family" time and just have some "do-nothing/ME" time.

It's apparent you've worked hard... give yourself a break.
Hug

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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02-07-2015, 04:58 PM
RE: My mother's stroke
I am sorry you and your family are going through all this...especially now when you have a whole new chapter of life getting ready to start.

My suggestion would be to let her be part of your move. It will be a way to help her feel a part of things and to feel 'normal'. Be sure to get pictures.

We can put our heads together and think of things that she can do to help...just her being there to share will be good for you both.

I do hope things improve with her health.

Vent away when needed.

Heart

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

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03-07-2015, 04:28 AM
RE: My mother's stroke
I am very sorry to learn of this. I echo the sentiment that one must focus on now, and leave the later until a time when you can plan for it. If your mother is a sensible woman, hopefully you will be able to explain to her that it may be best if she visits after your move, rather than being there as you move. Moving is pretty boring and mind numbing anyway, right?

As the time passes hopefully she will improve. Fingers crossed, as they say...Whatever you do, feel free to vent here. The people are wonderful and an enormous help in keeping one's spirits up. Have trust in yourself that you can and will deal with this situation. All this is quite new. Over time you all will get better at dealing with it. It is like anything else.

I wish you the best of luck and will be sure to keep my eye on this thread and offer any assistance I can.

Good luck. Dale

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
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03-07-2015, 10:05 AM
RE: My mother's stroke
When my mother had her stroke (it was an aneurysm which is the worst kind of stroke) we had physical therapy for her and depending on your health insurance, you might be able to get some sort of in house care for her.... for a short time anyway. It might help the strain of her being around.

Many stroke patients can improve, especially in the first year, but she needs to keep the physical therapy going. Tell her god created physical therapists JUST for her, cause she's sooo special. It's a lie, of course, but sometimes it's what you have to do to get things going.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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03-07-2015, 11:03 AM
RE: My mother's stroke
Ongoing physiotherapy is a MUST... without it, any progress is minimal and horrendously slow.

Even for a short time period, get a professional physiotherapist to work with her. Pay close attention to what and how they work, so that you and the rest of the family can continue the work with her.

Her improvement will depend on very active, continuous, and productive therapy. It will be difficult because it has to be, in order to get her at least, close to "normal". Whatever you can do to pay for a professional nurse or physiotherapist, it will be very well worth it - improvement will be vast.
***

Physiotherapy is a very in demand profession - it touches on physiology, medicine, linguistics, neuroscience. I wish more people would go into it and nursing - both professions are seriously understaffed.

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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04-07-2015, 11:09 AM
RE: My mother's stroke
Ugh, really sorry I took so long to reply. I put it off for a day, and then when I had it mostly written my computer froze (word of advice; never buy a Chromebook, ever). Thanks for all replies.

The subject of what was going to happen at moving in day actually came up, and I think we reached the verdict that she'd come and just sit on the bed while we did everything.

And yeah, she's been doing therapy since it happened and is still doing going to see someone once a week. I'm supposed to be moving her arm around every day.

(02-07-2015 12:01 PM)kim Wrote:  Impending stress can blow shit out of proportion and make EVERYTHING seem daunting. Maybe try to focus on what can be accomplished just this moment, only ... and not worry about what may or may not happen later.

It also sounds as if you might need a break from "family" time and just have some "do-nothing/ME" time.

It's apparent you've worked hard... give yourself a break.
Hug

Blush I don't do that much, really. Lately I've been driving her around a bit and sometimes I have to sit around with her, but that's about it. I have plenty of alone time.

(03-07-2015 04:28 AM)Banjo Wrote:  I am very sorry to learn of this. I echo the sentiment that one must focus on now, and leave the later until a time when you can plan for it. If your mother is a sensible woman, hopefully you will be able to explain to her that it may be best if she visits after your move, rather than being there as you move. Moving is pretty boring and mind numbing anyway, right?

The college is three or four (don't remember) hours from our house. No one really wants to make the trip more times than absolutely necessary.

Popcorn I put more thought into fiction than theists put into reality.
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04-07-2015, 12:49 PM
RE: My mother's stroke
Oh goodness...

Sending a million hugs!


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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