My stupid brain is never giving me a break
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28-03-2017, 10:32 AM
RE: My stupid brain is never giving me a break
(28-03-2017 10:20 AM)LadyDay Wrote:  
(28-03-2017 10:07 AM)GirlyMan Wrote:  Do they have clinical trials in your country for experimental treatments?

Of course Smile
I'm on one medicine wise, and my psychiatrist tried to get me in on a trial of the Pulsed Electromagnetic Field Therapy recently. Unfortunately they only have equipment for two patients in this part of the country and I could not be one of the patients because I've been sick for too long (20 years. Since I was a child.) Hopefully it'll be wider available in half a years time. Then I'll get to try it. *fingers crossed*

You got state of the art technology on your side. Thumbsup

(28-03-2017 10:25 AM)LadyDay Wrote:  Retiring at 30 seems rather a lot early though.

It's quite an accomplishment. At least you're in a compassionate country where that is possible.

#sigh
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28-03-2017, 10:54 AM
RE: My stupid brain is never giving me a break
(28-03-2017 10:26 AM)Emma Wrote:  Not under circumstances that would prevent them from fully enjoying retirement...

You haven't failed LadyDay Heart You've been a warrior, fighting so hard to do your work- to live your life. You'll continue to fight hard every day that you have the spoons for it. Maybe look at the success as being in the struggle any time you can, and not as the achievement of a distant goal?

You're a good person with a wonderfully kind heart. I'm glad you're here and sharing your time with your internet friends. Hug

You are an incredibly sweet and understanding person! Very wise.
I'll try to keep in mind that just having fought myself this far is an achievement. And that every day I make as good as possible is an achievement. And getting myself as healthy as possible is an achievement.

You lot are awesome internet friends, who make me feel stronger Heart

"I believe that while not all people are essentially good, most are trying" - Adam Savage
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28-03-2017, 11:02 AM
RE: My stupid brain is never giving me a break
(28-03-2017 10:32 AM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(28-03-2017 10:20 AM)LadyDay Wrote:  Of course Smile
I'm on one medicine wise, and my psychiatrist tried to get me in on a trial of the Pulsed Electromagnetic Field Therapy recently. Unfortunately they only have equipment for two patients in this part of the country and I could not be one of the patients because I've been sick for too long (20 years. Since I was a child.) Hopefully it'll be wider available in half a years time. Then I'll get to try it. *fingers crossed*

You got state of the art technology on your side. Thumbsup

(28-03-2017 10:25 AM)LadyDay Wrote:  Retiring at 30 seems rather a lot early though.

It's quite an accomplishment. At least you're in a compassionate country where that is possible.

I do have all the best in treatment available to me. And an incredibly skilled head doctor of psychiatry on my case, who dedicates herself, her work and her time to me and makes sure I get every possible medical opportunity and am discussed with the other head doctors and researchers. She really is awesome! She's the superstar of psychiatry and I'm so impressed and lucky to have her on my case!

And you are very right that I'm incredibly fortunate to be in this country. Our welfare system is unrivaled and I get to reap the benefits of that. If you have to be seriously ill, this is definitely the country to do it in!

The staff around me is so amazing and caring, and I wan't to hug everybody in the country to thank them for paying so high taxes so that little old me can be safe and stable.

"I believe that while not all people are essentially good, most are trying" - Adam Savage
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28-03-2017, 12:09 PM
RE: My stupid brain is never giving me a break
I'm so sorry, I have what you have, as you know and I'm facing losing my social security in the next few weeks as rules here in Britain are sooo tough although not as bad as the USA, my anxiety is horrific and I feel I have no future you are not alone I do understand. BTW you and I do not have a disease per se, we have a condition or an illness disease is caused by pathogens or bodily physical dysfunction like cancer etc. There's a reason its called mental illness rather than mental disease, its a small thing but one of my bug bears Big Grin I'm sending you lots of love and best wishes.
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28-03-2017, 02:11 PM
RE: My stupid brain is never giving me a break
(28-03-2017 12:09 PM)adey67 Wrote:  I'm so sorry, I have what you have, as you know and I'm facing losing my social security in the next few weeks as rules here in Britain are sooo tough although not as bad as the USA, my anxiety is horrific and I feel I have no future you are not alone I do understand. BTW you and I do not have a disease per se, we have a condition or an illness disease is caused by pathogens or bodily physical dysfunction like cancer etc. There's a reason its called mental illness rather than mental disease, its a small thing but one of my bug bears Big Grin I'm sending you lots of love and best wishes.

Haha. I'll try to keep the difference between disease and illness in mind. English is not my first language, so I'm probably fuzzy on some details. We have one word covering both.
I hope we can comfort each other Smile You are not alone in it either. I hope you'll let me know how you get on with the social security. I'm thinking about you Smile Give your dog some cuddles from me.

"I believe that while not all people are essentially good, most are trying" - Adam Savage
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28-03-2017, 02:26 PM
RE: My stupid brain is never giving me a break
I know how you feel. I had to quit my last job due to my anxiety disorder. It was recommended by my old therapist that I quit and it caused more drama than I needed. I actually didn't mind working that much, my husband took over and paid the bills for awhile and I felt horrible. On the upside I got to put more time into cognitive behavioral therapy and ERP. :/

I hope you start to feel better. If you need to talk to someone I can try helping. Anxiety sucks.
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28-03-2017, 04:14 PM
RE: My stupid brain is never giving me a break
Sorry that you have to go through this.
May I ask, I might have missed it if you posted this somewhere else, what your decease is? Is it the depression and anxiety or are those symptoms of some underlying issue?

Don't think that you are failing. You are obviously doing the best you can. And that is the only thing that counts.

Now with the high pulse and anxiety I understand very well. I am dealing with depression and anxiety too and I have done so since my brain was able to feel that way. So it's been a while. Recently I had to get an EEG and a 24 hr heart monitor done. Had to explain those spikes of heart rates to the doctor so totally get where you are coming from there.
There are certain ways you can learn to deal with it better or to try and snap yourself out of it. Maybe you are in therapy and learned some methods so of course I don't know what you already know or tried but feel free to pm me if you wanna talk through a few things to help you get a bit more stable again. After more than 2 decades dealing with this, maybe there is something useful for you in the things I tried. I just don't want to derail this thread.

The thing with work is difficult, I know. Different things can trigger your anxiety there. You can love it a lot but there might be just something off about one aspect and that kinda starts it. If you can find out what that one thing is, you might be able to go in prepared for that and tackle the issue right there.

Anyway the pm offer is open or skype if you want to talk for real. Just make sure you have someone as you mental safety net for those moments.

cheers

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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29-03-2017, 01:43 AM
RE: My stupid brain is never giving me a break
(28-03-2017 02:26 PM)Larai19 Wrote:  I know how you feel. I had to quit my last job due to my anxiety disorder. It was recommended by my old therapist that I quit and it caused more drama than I needed. I actually didn't mind working that much, my husband took over and paid the bills for awhile and I felt horrible. On the upside I got to put more time into cognitive behavioral therapy and ERP. :/

I hope you start to feel better. If you need to talk to someone I can try helping. Anxiety sucks.

It does feel horrible and defeating to not be able to do all the things "normal" people can do. But at the same time, feelings of shame aside, it feels like a huge relief to not have to do something that caused me so much distress.

"I believe that while not all people are essentially good, most are trying" - Adam Savage
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29-03-2017, 01:52 AM
RE: My stupid brain is never giving me a break
(28-03-2017 04:14 PM)Leerob Wrote:  Sorry that you have to go through this.
May I ask, I might have missed it if you posted this somewhere else, what your decease is? Is it the depression and anxiety or are those symptoms of some underlying issue?

Don't think that you are failing. You are obviously doing the best you can. And that is the only thing that counts.

Now with the high pulse and anxiety I understand very well. I am dealing with depression and anxiety too and I have done so since my brain was able to feel that way. So it's been a while. Recently I had to get an EEG and a 24 hr heart monitor done. Had to explain those spikes of heart rates to the doctor so totally get where you are coming from there.
There are certain ways you can learn to deal with it better or to try and snap yourself out of it. Maybe you are in therapy and learned some methods so of course I don't know what you already know or tried but feel free to pm me if you wanna talk through a few things to help you get a bit more stable again. After more than 2 decades dealing with this, maybe there is something useful for you in the things I tried. I just don't want to derail this thread.

The thing with work is difficult, I know. Different things can trigger your anxiety there. You can love it a lot but there might be just something off about one aspect and that kinda starts it. If you can find out what that one thing is, you might be able to go in prepared for that and tackle the issue right there.

Anyway the pm offer is open or skype if you want to talk for real. Just make sure you have someone as you mental safety net for those moments.

cheers

Yep, depression and anxiety for two decades here too *fistbump*
They are the main issue, not a symptom of something else.

The high pulse for me is not the result of the anxiety (though that also makes my heart race whenever I have a panic attack and I have general anxiety on top of the panic attacks). It's a side effects of one of the drugs I take. Anafranil. Unfortunately I can't just change to another drug or lower the dose. We've tried. The meds I take are a very specific cocktail, worked out over a lot of years. It's the only drugs that have ever had any effect on me, and I've tried everything, so there isn't much to do about it.

I've had loads of therapy too, since I was just a kid. I hope yours is helping you! Therapy has unfortunately never helped me with the depression and anxiety. I do get regular psychologist sessions at the moment, which is helping my self confidence a bit.
Thank you for offering to be there for me to talk to. Having people here on the forum helps me a lot.

"I believe that while not all people are essentially good, most are trying" - Adam Savage
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29-03-2017, 02:36 AM
RE: My stupid brain is never giving me a break
I made it outside the apartment today! Down to the shops. Smile
(It's important to celebrate the little victories)

"I believe that while not all people are essentially good, most are trying" - Adam Savage
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