My wife is going to get baptized.
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27-04-2015, 07:35 PM
RE: My wife is going to get baptized.
(27-04-2015 07:28 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  Will there be food? And joyous naked dancing under the full moon? And more food? What's the problem?

Don't forget your goat leggings. Evil_monster
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27-04-2015, 07:52 PM
RE: My wife is going to get baptized.
Maybe my wording of "progressive" wasn't perfect. But it isnt a typical catholic or Methodist church, it has stadium style seating, no Eucharist, the pastors all wear jeans and t shirts. That kind of church.
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27-04-2015, 07:54 PM
RE: My wife is going to get baptized.
(27-04-2015 07:52 PM)Rkane819 Wrote:  Maybe my wording of "progressive" wasn't perfect. But it isnt a typical catholic or Methodist church, it has stadium style seating, no Eucharist, the pastors all wear jeans and t shirts. That kind of church.

And the food?

#sigh
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27-04-2015, 09:19 PM
RE: My wife is going to get baptized.
Coffee and donuts, nothing to get excited about.
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27-04-2015, 09:31 PM
RE: My wife is going to get baptized.
(27-04-2015 09:19 PM)Rkane819 Wrote:  Coffee and donuts, nothing to get excited about.

Not worth it then.

#sigh
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27-04-2015, 09:34 PM
RE: My wife is going to get baptized.
(27-04-2015 09:31 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(27-04-2015 09:19 PM)Rkane819 Wrote:  Coffee and donuts, nothing to get excited about.

Not worth it then.

Not so fast.
1. Are there bingo nights ?
2. Do the church ladies make hot-dishes from Garrison Keillor's cookbooks ?

Insufferable know-it-all.Einstein God has a plan for us. Please stop screwing it up with your prayers.
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27-04-2015, 09:36 PM
RE: My wife is going to get baptized.
(27-04-2015 09:34 PM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  
(27-04-2015 09:31 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  Not worth it then.

Not so fast.
1. Are there bingo nights ?
2. Do the church ladies make hot-dishes from Garrison Keillor's cookbooks ?

If Keillor's recipes are as awful as his books, I'll pass too.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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27-04-2015, 09:39 PM
RE: My wife is going to get baptized.
(26-04-2015 08:33 PM)Rkane819 Wrote:  I'll give you the facts in quick bullet points.

-I'm an atheist

-My wife started attending A very progressive christian church several months ago.

-She has decided she wants to be baptized by said church

-She did not grow up religious

-We've been together 8 years and she did not express religious beliefs for the first 7 years we were together.

-She works for a Christian company

-We have a 1 year old son

-We've discussed the topic of religion only a few times prior.

-She's been reading apologetics booked lately and is currently reading one by Lee Strobell.

-She has not read the bible.

My issue isn't so much with the actual baptism (although maybe it should be) but what it stands for and the fact that she hasn't read the bible makes me think she hasn't done her due diligence on the christian faith. My fear is that she will become more and more involved in the church and start passing these beliefs onto our son and more and more religious stuff will start creeping into our lives.

When she mentioned she was going to be baptized it was more as a statement not as a point of discussion. Our relationship is great and both of us generally keep our beliefs to ourselves. She suffered some pretty bad post partum depression and has been noticeably happier since attending church so maybe I shouldn't be complaining but there is still a nagging voice in the back of my head that shouts "How can an adult hear the story of Jesus and think it's true?! How?!"

So my question I guess is would you let this go because everything else is good? Should I try and talk her out of it? Am I being ridiculous posting this in the first place?

I realize my situation pales in comparison to what other atheists endure with their families but I'm struggling with how to proceed. Any thoughts are appreciated.

About all I can think of with this is that your wife is an adult and she has made a decision regarding her life. Not really sure what you can, or should, do about it. I suppose the next step is to see how things play out. Sounds like she is searching for something. It could be a phase.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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27-04-2015, 10:39 PM
RE: My wife is going to get baptized.
Have you figured out what was missing in her life to cause her to go looking for spirituality or outside support?

She's searching for something, try to understand what it is ASAP.

“I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man’s reasoning powers are not above the monkey’s.”~Mark Twain
“Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.”~ Ambrose Bierce
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28-04-2015, 07:59 AM
RE: My wife is going to get baptized.
(26-04-2015 08:33 PM)Rkane819 Wrote:  I'll give you the facts in quick bullet points.

-I'm an atheist

-My wife started attending A very progressive christian church several months ago.

-She has decided she wants to be baptized by said church

-She did not grow up religious

-We've been together 8 years and she did not express religious beliefs for the first 7 years we were together.

-She works for a Christian company

-We have a 1 year old son

-We've discussed the topic of religion only a few times prior.

-She's been reading apologetics booked lately and is currently reading one by Lee Strobell.

-She has not read the bible.

My issue isn't so much with the actual baptism (although maybe it should be) but what it stands for and the fact that she hasn't read the bible makes me think she hasn't done her due diligence on the christian faith. My fear is that she will become more and more involved in the church and start passing these beliefs onto our son and more and more religious stuff will start creeping into our lives.

When she mentioned she was going to be baptized it was more as a statement not as a point of discussion. Our relationship is great and both of us generally keep our beliefs to ourselves. She suffered some pretty bad post partum depression and has been noticeably happier since attending church so maybe I shouldn't be complaining but there is still a nagging voice in the back of my head that shouts "How can an adult hear the story of Jesus and think it's true?! How?!"

So my question I guess is would you let this go because everything else is good? Should I try and talk her out of it? Am I being ridiculous posting this in the first place?

I realize my situation pales in comparison to what other atheists endure with their families but I'm struggling with how to proceed. Any thoughts are appreciated.

You are right to feel threatened by this on some level.
I have 3 kids and am married to a Christian wife (im an atheist). We however were both mild Christians when we met and married and I was the apostate.
My wife, however, doesn't have any desire to get baptized, but she still attends church and has Christian friends, some Christian male friends that seem to be a little to close sometimes for my comfort level. My point is that I know first hand the struggles of being married and having kids with a theist spouse.

As your wife delves deeper into this Christian culture, she is taking on a new life that is separate from you. You will not be able to grow with her in her new found born again quest for Christ, because you are after all an atheist. She is going down a path that she knows you will not be able to follow.

I'm not trying to insinuate that your marriage is now doomed and destined for divorce. However, all marriages have obstacles to overcome and this will, in all likelihood, be something that will become an impediment to your having a happy marriage. It will be something you two will have to work out. In my marriage, most of the time we never discuss religion. Invariably though the topic of religion will rear its ugly head from time to time and create some contentious disagreements. We've been able to make our marriage work so far. So there is hope, but in all honesty, the situation is far from ideal. Luckily we have many other things in common, and common interest separate from religion to keep us connected. I do think things would be much better, and easier, were we either both atheist or both Christian.

Next question: she sounds like she is becoming enamoured with the Christian apologetic books she is reading. Would she be aggreeable to reading a book with a dissenting opinion of Christianity? If so, may I suggest, "50 question for Christians" by Guy P. Harrison. It's wriiten in a respectful non-strident tone, but will address a good number of counter arguments to some of the Christian biased books she has been reading.

I think we atheist with Christian spouses need our own support group. It's tough! I absolutely can empathize with your situation.
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