Nebraskan Newb
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13-11-2013, 10:03 PM
Nebraskan Newb
I copy and pasted this from my response to the Intro thread up above, but in hindsight, I preferred having my own thread. Hope that's ok!

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I'm a former zealous evangelical, baptized and raised LCMS. I made my "personal commitment" when I was 16, and from that point threw myself in reading my Bible. I discovered 1 Thessolonians 5:21 which reads "test everything; hold on to what is good" and 1 Peter 3:15 ".... Always be prepared to give an answer for the hope that you have." Motivated by these verses, I threw myself into Bible study. I was truly hungry to learn. The Bible was a puzzle though. One question seemed to lead to another question, rather than an answer. When I'd challenge others, their answers were incomplete, or they'd spit out canned answers. My mind toiled trying to reason it out. Meanwhile, I was active in my youth group, taught Sunday School and VBS, and joined the Evangelism Board. I looked for ways to share the gospel, and spent long hours talking with my fundy best friend about how to "save souls" (gag).

I went off to college to study music, but a deep depression (from the cognitive dissonance) left me listless and unproductive. I reasoned it must be because god is calling me to church work (wtf). My second year, this time at a Lutheran university to go into church work, left my insides toiling much the same way. I'd cry out to what I thought was god "what am I supposed to dooooooooo??!" No answer, surprise! At the end of my spring semester there, my advisor handed all of us first-year church work students a form, and we were supposed to sign promising our commitment to the faith. That was my turning point. That's when I realized I was doubting and I couldn't do it in good conscience.

I left that school, married my [Christian] husband, and we embarked on our life together in a Christian marriage. My faith, meanwhile, unraveled one thin thread at a time over the course of six years, making a pit stop at Catholicism in 2006 and going as far as coming out as Catholic to my family (doh), which sent them in a hysteric panicked uproar . One day, just before I started catechism, my better sense wrangled me by the throat and basically said "are you MAD?! So I was done. Just... done.

I left the faith thing alone for several years. My daughter was born in 2010, and baptized per my husband's faith (who was still humming along perfectly content as an LCMSer). A few months later, I woke up one day and realized with lump in my throat that I was agnostic. Thus started my habitation in the closet, except for my husband (who was devastated), my "spiritual" sister, my atheist brother, and my skeptic father. This last year I planted my paradigm squarely in atheism.

Three years later I'm still in the closet, by and large, but I feel closer to coming out. I'm thinking about it, strongly. Anyway, it's good to be here--- I LOVE TTA radio show---- and I'm anxious to read up!
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13-11-2013, 10:09 PM
RE: Nebraskan Newb
(13-11-2013 10:03 PM)TheAtheistCheezit Wrote:  I copy and pasted this from my response to the Intro thread up above, but in hindsight, I preferred having my own thread. Hope that's ok!

------------

I'm a former zealous evangelical, baptized and raised LCMS. I made my "personal commitment" when I was 16, and from that point threw myself in reading my Bible. I discovered 1 Thessolonians 5:21 which reads "test everything; hold on to what is good" and 1 Peter 3:15 ".... Always be prepared to give an answer for the hope that you have." Motivated by these verses, I threw myself into Bible study. I was truly hungry to learn. The Bible was a puzzle though. One question seemed to lead to another question, rather than an answer. When I'd challenge others, their answers were incomplete, or they'd spit out canned answers. My mind toiled trying to reason it out. Meanwhile, I was active in my youth group, taught Sunday School and VBS, and joined the Evangelism Board. I looked for ways to share the gospel, and spent long hours talking with my fundy best friend about how to "save souls" (gag).

I went off to college to study music, but a deep depression (from the cognitive dissonance) left me listless and unproductive. I reasoned it must be because god is calling me to church work (wtf). My second year, this time at a Lutheran university to go into church work, left my insides toiling much the same way. I'd cry out to what I thought was god "what am I supposed to dooooooooo??!" No answer, surprise! At the end of my spring semester there, my advisor handed all of us first-year church work students a form, and we were supposed to sign promising our commitment to the faith. That was my turning point. That's when I realized I was doubting and I couldn't do it in good conscience.

I left that school, married my [Christian] husband, and we embarked on our life together in a Christian marriage. My faith, meanwhile, unraveled one thin thread at a time over the course of six years, making a pit stop at Catholicism in 2006 and going as far as coming out as Catholic to my family (doh), which sent them in a hysteric panicked uproar . One day, just before I started catechism, my better sense wrangled me by the throat and basically said "are you MAD?! So I was done. Just... done.

I left the faith thing alone for several years. My daughter was born in 2010, and baptized per my husband's faith (who was still humming along perfectly content as an LCMSer). A few months later, I woke up one day and realized with lump in my throat that I was agnostic. Thus started my habitation in the closet, except for my husband (who was devastated), my "spiritual" sister, my atheist brother, and my skeptic father. This last year I planted my paradigm squarely in atheism.

Three years later I'm still in the closet, by and large, but I feel closer to coming out. I'm thinking about it, strongly. Anyway, it's good to be here--- I LOVE TTA radio show---- and I'm anxious to read up!

Welcome and Hug

My husband and I are both atheist, but he was never particularly religious, while I was -- I thought religious.

He doesn't understand my deconversion process. Finding this place was wonderful because it often reinforces the very reasons I'm agnostic/atheist.

I came out to my family and was completely cut out of their lives save for an occassional book being sent to my home they feel I should read.


God is a concept by which we measure our pain -- John Lennon

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13-11-2013, 10:16 PM
RE: Nebraskan Newb
Hey, a newb to the north. (Kansas here)

Welcome to the nuthouse! Thumbsup

But now I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

~ Umberto Eco
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13-11-2013, 10:35 PM
RE: Nebraskan Newb
Ouch Momsurrounded! Terrible Sad I don't expect disownment, just sad sad countenances and annoying attempts to reconvert me. Maybe books. Maybe behind the back attempts to get to my daughter, which would anger me. My husband is still Christian. It's causing... issues.

evenheathen- thanks for the welcome!

Properly read, the Bible is the most potent force for atheism ever conceived. - Isaac Asimov
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13-11-2013, 11:06 PM
RE: Nebraskan Newb
Howdy, and welcome. Hope to see ya' 'round.

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14-11-2013, 08:54 AM
RE: Nebraskan Newb
Welcome aboard Smile

" Generally speaking, the errors in religion are dangerous; those in philosophy only ridiculous."
David Hume
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