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04-11-2012, 09:05 PM
Need Advice
Wassup guys, I'm from a small city in the mid-west, so as you can imagine my family is pretty religious. I've always been a christian but I've always been skeptical as well. Eventually (largely thanks to the internet) I became agnostic and recently crossed the thin line into atheism. I've told my closest friends who are totally cool with it even though most of them are somewhat religious. I've gotten into a couple of arguments on the subject with my friends but for the most part it's no big deal.

The problem is my family. Only three people in my family know: my mom, my stepdad, and my cousin. All of them have a HUGE problem with me being an atheist. Coming out to my parents about my atheism was one of the worst nights of my life, yet also one of the best. I don't enjoy seeing family members cry because of their overwhelming fear that their son will roast in hellfire, but being open about it has given me some more freedom. On the other hand, it's also a curse because we can't even talk about it without it turning into an argument. I have yet to tell my dad, who, I'm assuming will be just as upset, so I'm not looking forward to it. But the rest of my family is the biggest problem. I just know that certain grandparents would never talk to me again if they knew, and I would constantly be getting letters and messages and invitations. But I don't want to be closeted about my atheism for the rest of my life.

What do you guys think I should do? Anyone have any similar situations?
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04-11-2012, 09:32 PM
RE: Need Advice
Not been there myself but plenty have.

Have a look here:

http://www.thethinkingatheist.com/forum/...m-Religion


and good luck!

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05-11-2012, 04:47 PM
RE: Need Advice
(04-11-2012 09:05 PM)sliceoflife Wrote:  Wassup guys, I'm from a small city in the mid-west, so as you can imagine my family is pretty religious. I've always been a christian but I've always been skeptical as well. Eventually (largely thanks to the internet) I became agnostic and recently crossed the thin line into atheism. I've told my closest friends who are totally cool with it even though most of them are somewhat religious. I've gotten into a couple of arguments on the subject with my friends but for the most part it's no big deal.

The problem is my family. Only three people in my family know: my mom, my stepdad, and my cousin. All of them have a HUGE problem with me being an atheist. Coming out to my parents about my atheism was one of the worst nights of my life, yet also one of the best. I don't enjoy seeing family members cry because of their overwhelming fear that their son will roast in hellfire, but being open about it has given me some more freedom. On the other hand, it's also a curse because we can't even talk about it without it turning into an argument. I have yet to tell my dad, who, I'm assuming will be just as upset, so I'm not looking forward to it. But the rest of my family is the biggest problem. I just know that certain grandparents would never talk to me again if they knew, and I would constantly be getting letters and messages and invitations. But I don't want to be closeted about my atheism for the rest of my life.

What do you guys think I should do? Anyone have any similar situations?
I suggest you move back to your agnostic position in order to obtain some wriggle room with your parents.
You can keep things pretty low key even by saying that you are investigating Christianity further to feel more comfortable about some things. Your folk sound quite religious and arguments are no fun. The option of lying just to appease them will only make you feel a bit of a hypocrite. Slow and easy may be best.....no violent confrontations.
Good luck. Consider
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05-11-2012, 05:59 PM
RE: Need Advice
I've never felt the need to go out of my way to let everyone in my life know what I believe.. or in this case what I do not. If the conversations come up -- I just discuss the things that I find really hard to believe about religions and ask their opinions on it. I find that it is easier for others to deal with your curiosity than to straight out say that you are an atheist. However, this is coming from a 30 yo who's family has long gotten over my non belief and my friends who are religious just stopped talking to me about it.. It was a lot harder as a teen .. but I wasn't full out atheist at that point.. I just knew I didn't believe in Mormonism .. I guess what I'm trying to say.. is that .. if your immediate family knows and isn't shoving church down your face as a way to cure you.. consider yourself .. open about who you are. Approach every conversation as a just that.. and don't feel the need to label yourself to everyone you know. My uber religious extended family probably have no idea that I am a dirty non believer.. nor a lot of other things about me either .. so eek.. just be you Smile

Life is short and hard like a body building elf-- Blood Hound Gang
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05-11-2012, 10:12 PM
RE: Need Advice
You should be like Rick James and just kick their beliefs and be like "fuck yo bullshit"


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