Need Some Advice
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10-11-2017, 09:23 PM
Need Some Advice
So, I'm coming to the end, in this next year, of my associates degree. I have pondered on getting my bachelors, but there are too many things in the way to do that. Between me still getting a car, having to help pay for bills and other things, it's not easy to save. Plus I don't feel comfortable driving yet.

Now, my family, mainly my stepdad and my real mom, don't get that. He berates me because I don't get my license, and how I should go into business. Even though I've said SEVERAL times I'm not interested in running my own business. Keep in mind they are heavy conservatives. My bachelors would require for me to to go to Virginia Tech, which would be long, complicated, and getting a job to sustain myself would be even harder!

I've also thought about going for something else, Horticulture is my major because that's what I love. My real mom, not my grandmother who I call 'mom', suggested I go into accounting. I said flat out 'That sounds like a boring job.'. I don't want to do something that will pay high, but make me dread going to work everyday. She gets all huffy on how 'You think you know everything!' when I tell her no to what she suggests.

I asked for advice asshat, not you telling me I should do something. Also there are times I'm just venting, and want someone to tell me I don't have to go for my bachelors to be successful. The odds are staked against me, getting a car isn't easy, much less me not being terrified to drive. My own aunts took till they were 25 to drive, and it was also for the same reasons I have.
Seems like everyone in my family is being an asshole, telling me to go into business, get my own company. No matter how many times I tell them it just isn't that simple as it used to me. I passed Business Math by the skin of my teeth! What makes them think I can do all the other classes with it. I'm just not interested in ruling over people, too much stress, numbers, and frustrating days. They think i'll just magically change my mind about it. Sorry family I'm not going to be your Trump.

Thing is, I want to get another degree, but it's not what they like. I want to minor in Philosophy, but my school doesn't have that. And i don't want to go far, as getting a dorm and job with no car isn't easy. I'm working on my licenses, after I get behind a car with someone I trust first. All my family has is a truck, jeep, and another truck. Not the best to start on.

Everything is against me, and they just keep telling me the odds. I get I should go to college while I can being under 21 and such. But, I'm happy with my degree and just getting an associates as, for me alone, I could afford a nice apartment and food, and STILL have enough to save for nice things. But NOOOO I have to get my own company or flower shop and such. That alone doesn't apply to me, I'll let another crunch those numbers, I'd much rather be in the field working with the plants than in an office.

What do you all think? I'm unsure what to do, anything but accounting that is for sure thought, and it's not easy when family isn't helping. I kind of want opinions from people who don't claim to automatically know me.

"Governments don't want well informed, well educated people capable of critical thinking That is against their interests.
They want obedient workers people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork And just dumb enough to passively accept it."

- George Carlin
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10-11-2017, 11:31 PM
RE: Need Some Advice
I think you should do what you love and get as educated and as well-trained in it as you can.
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11-11-2017, 05:36 AM
RE: Need Some Advice
If you like horticulture, get a job in that. Your degree should make it so that you can get a decent position. Learn the business and see if you get ideas for starting a business of your own. And use the money to move out.

I agree with your family is that it would be worth it to get your license, even if you're nervous about driving. The ability to drive will make you much more independent and make it easier for you to leave. But go to a driving school and don't have your relatives teach you; you've posted about that before, and it sounds like they are terrible teachers. (Use your job money to pay for the driving lessons)

Regarding philosophy, it's a wonderful thing to pursue something for the love of it. However, if you're thinking of doing something in the philosophy field--that is, something for which you'd need a degree in philosophy--you'd probably need to be in it for a Ph.D., not a bachelors. That's a lot of ketchup-sandwich-budget years to go through.

Also you should be aware that if the tax plan in its current form passes, it's going to be much more expensive for students who get scholarships or tuition reductions to go to college, since those are going to be considered taxable income. I hope that won't happen, but if it does, it's another factor to consider.

If you don't have a clear and pressing vision about what you want from college at this point, there's nothing wrong with putting further education off for a while. Colleges are very accepting of older students these days. I went to college when I was 17 and enjoyed it and learned some--although I wound up dropping out--but I learned much more when I went to grad school in my 30s. I was much more focused and motivated by that time.
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11-11-2017, 05:58 AM (This post was last modified: 11-11-2017 06:03 AM by Thoreauvian.)
RE: Need Some Advice
If you are ever comfortable driving, you aren't paying enough attention.

You can always read philosophy on your own.

Always have a Plan B.

And a Plan C isn't a bad idea either. Life often chooses for us. All we can do is be prepared.
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11-11-2017, 06:07 AM
RE: Need Some Advice
My son loves Horticulture and my advice to him was to go for it, especially with the climate changing (like the many crop failures we've had up here (with the summer that never was) we're going to need all the scientists & engineers we can get to figure out how to grow food in the world that is coming.

Get your licence, do it through a driving school, I don't know if its the same where you are but having a driver training certificate from a driving school should help you get lower car insurance. But don't get a car unless you really think you need one, I don't know what public transit is like where you are, and I know taking 3 buses and 45 minutes to get to work & home is a pain, but cars are expensive (gas,insurance,maintence etc). I used to just rent a car once a month or so to do big shopping or to see friends etc...

A friend in the hole

"If we're going to be damned, let's be damned for what we really are." - Captain Picard
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11-11-2017, 06:45 AM
RE: Need Some Advice
My older sister has a master's in horticulture from Michigan.

In 35+ years, she has yet to work in the field.

So, ya never know...

....

I'm a double atheist. I don't believe in your god or your politician.
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11-11-2017, 11:49 AM
RE: Need Some Advice
(10-11-2017 09:23 PM)Ruby Crystal Wrote:  So, I'm coming to the end, in this next year, of my associates degree. I have pondered on getting my bachelors, but there are too many things in the way to do that. Between me still getting a car, having to help pay for bills and other things, it's not easy to save. Plus I don't feel comfortable driving yet.

Now, my family, mainly my stepdad and my real mom, don't get that. He berates me because I don't get my license, and how I should go into business. Even though I've said SEVERAL times I'm not interested in running my own business. Keep in mind they are heavy conservatives. My bachelors would require for me to to go to Virginia Tech, which would be long, complicated, and getting a job to sustain myself would be even harder!

I've also thought about going for something else, Horticulture is my major because that's what I love. My real mom, not my grandmother who I call 'mom', suggested I go into accounting. I said flat out 'That sounds like a boring job.'. I don't want to do something that will pay high, but make me dread going to work everyday. She gets all huffy on how 'You think you know everything!' when I tell her no to what she suggests.

I asked for advice asshat, not you telling me I should do something. Also there are times I'm just venting, and want someone to tell me I don't have to go for my bachelors to be successful. The odds are staked against me, getting a car isn't easy, much less me not being terrified to drive. My own aunts took till they were 25 to drive, and it was also for the same reasons I have.
Seems like everyone in my family is being an asshole, telling me to go into business, get my own company. No matter how many times I tell them it just isn't that simple as it used to me. I passed Business Math by the skin of my teeth! What makes them think I can do all the other classes with it. I'm just not interested in ruling over people, too much stress, numbers, and frustrating days. They think i'll just magically change my mind about it. Sorry family I'm not going to be your Trump.

Thing is, I want to get another degree, but it's not what they like. I want to minor in Philosophy, but my school doesn't have that. And i don't want to go far, as getting a dorm and job with no car isn't easy. I'm working on my licenses, after I get behind a car with someone I trust first. All my family has is a truck, jeep, and another truck. Not the best to start on.

Everything is against me, and they just keep telling me the odds. I get I should go to college while I can being under 21 and such. But, I'm happy with my degree and just getting an associates as, for me alone, I could afford a nice apartment and food, and STILL have enough to save for nice things. But NOOOO I have to get my own company or flower shop and such. That alone doesn't apply to me, I'll let another crunch those numbers, I'd much rather be in the field working with the plants than in an office.

What do you all think? I'm unsure what to do, anything but accounting that is for sure thought, and it's not easy when family isn't helping. I kind of want opinions from people who don't claim to automatically know me.

Do exactly what will make you happy.

Nobody else has to live your life for you, so what they want is irrelevant. You are not going through life to follow the dictation of everyone else. They want you to dance to the tune they are playing, but you need to walk to the beat of your own drum.

In the end, it's not on anyone else, it's all on you.

Good luck.

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11-11-2017, 12:56 PM
RE: Need Some Advice
As others have said, do what interests you in a field you could love working in for a lifetime. Regardless of pressure from family, do not choose a major/field just because someone else thinks it is a good idea or thinks you could be successful/rich doing it. That way lies a life of dreading work.

If you think of working for a while after your Associate's degree is finished, then do that. You can wait to finish a Bachelor's after you have really decided what you want to do. And I understand your feelings about accounting. My dad was the bookkeeper and general accountant for a small company. Although I have been a computer nerd for more than 50 years and love math, I did not love the accounting classes I had to take for a Business degree. Actually, they kinda drove me nuts, while some of my classmates absolutely loved them. If you are not fond of math and spreadsheets, you would hate accounting. And running your own business is hard, requires a lot of diverse skills, about 26 hours a day, and some degree of controlled insanity. It is definitely not for anyone who doesn't love it.

Never take driver training or driving advice from family. Put off getting a car if there's any decent public transportation. If you must drive, get professional training, buy a reliable used car, and get good insurance.

"The very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They don't alter their views to fit the facts. They alter the facts to fit their views. Which can be uncomfortable if you happen to be one of the facts that needs altering." The (4th) Doctor
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11-11-2017, 01:05 PM (This post was last modified: 11-11-2017 01:17 PM by GirlyMan.)
RE: Need Some Advice
(10-11-2017 09:23 PM)Ruby Crystal Wrote:  I kind of want opinions from people who don't claim to automatically know me.

My opinion, get your Bachelors - Oaksterdam. VA Tech's also a very good school if you want something closer to home. Smile

I got a kid who is a weed-whisperer, I'm just waiting for it be full legal in my State and then we shall profit greatly. Up to 50 lbs for personal use is a misdemeanor in MD so we'll have some stock ready to go when the time comes. Big Grin

#sigh
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11-11-2017, 01:11 PM
RE: Need Some Advice
(11-11-2017 06:45 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  My older sister has a master's in horticulture from Michigan.

In 35+ years, she has yet to work in the field.

So, ya never know...

She should be able to qualify as a medical marijuana provider in Michigan. Hell my brother is a medical marijuana grower in MI and he doesn't have any degrees.

#sigh
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