Need some input regarding a reunion...
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24-08-2014, 02:24 AM
RE: Need some input regarding a reunion...
(24-08-2014 02:00 AM)Hafnof Wrote:  I'm heading to my 20 year high school reunion in a few months. I know a few of the people who will be going via facebook and by virtue of my children being friends with their children in a few cases. I'll be going with my wife and it's at a pub that is famous for its steak. I have no doubt I'll have a good time and care little of what some at the event might think of me. If you can approach it with that sort of frame of mind I'm sure you'll have fun.

If only it was that easy. I cut many ties years ago and more since. I keep in loose contact with just a few people. And it's a journey - not just a night out. It means traveling many states away, hotel rooms, time away from work...I am trying to decide if it's worth all that.

When I was diagnosed with cancer several people I hadn't had contact with in ages appeared on Facebook and there was a recurring theme that really got to me - I am so happy you turned your life around. Ummm, what? These people cared little about me when I was there and even less after I left town and then the state. Not only did they not care - they didn't know anything about me. How did I turn my life around? I left an abusive home life. It was implied that I fixed something that was my fault by more than one. I still don't think I can compete with their 'perfect' lives. From the time we moved there when I was 11 I felt inferior.

Well, Hafnof, I think I just talked myself into the trip less the reunion. I can still make time to see the few people I actually want to see and spend some rebonding time with my best friend. Thumbsup

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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24-08-2014, 06:32 AM
RE: Need some input regarding a reunion...
(24-08-2014 02:24 AM)Anjele Wrote:  
(24-08-2014 02:00 AM)Hafnof Wrote:  I'm heading to my 20 year high school reunion in a few months. I know a few of the people who will be going via facebook and by virtue of my children being friends with their children in a few cases. I'll be going with my wife and it's at a pub that is famous for its steak. I have no doubt I'll have a good time and care little of what some at the event might think of me. If you can approach it with that sort of frame of mind I'm sure you'll have fun.

If only it was that easy. I cut many ties years ago and more since. I keep in loose contact with just a few people. And it's a journey - not just a night out. It means traveling many states away, hotel rooms, time away from work...I am trying to decide if it's worth all that.

When I was diagnosed with cancer several people I hadn't had contact with in ages appeared on Facebook and there was a recurring theme that really got to me - I am so happy you turned your life around. Ummm, what? These people cared little about me when I was there and even less after I left town and then the state. Not only did they not care - they didn't know anything about me. How did I turn my life around? I left an abusive home life. It was implied that I fixed something that was my fault by more than one. I still don't think I can compete with their 'perfect' lives. From the time we moved there when I was 11 I felt inferior.

Well, Hafnof, I think I just talked myself into the trip less the reunion. I can still make time to see the few people I actually want to see and spend some rebonding time with my best friend. Thumbsup

I went to a grade school reunion many moons ago. Yep grade school, lots of them still live in the same neighborhood. I went because I wanted to see whatever happened to Karl, my grade school flame. Turns out he is a reporter at the Vatican. Rabidly catholic. Facepalm

The guy was so stiff and intransigent, he might have been one of the walking dead. Soooo disappointing, I remembered such good times with him. I haven't gone to any reunion since, I'd rather keep my memories the way they are.

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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24-08-2014, 06:45 AM
RE: Need some input regarding a reunion...
I went to my 10 year, cut out half way thru with a friend and went clubbing.

Fast forward 25 years and now I see many on Facebook, some that I wasn't friends with in high school are now on my friend list. I was curious about them, surprised and a bit flattered that 20 years later they wanted to be 'friends'. Some I've actually started to get to know now that all the high school drama is gone and we are having shared experiences like children, death of our parents, health struggles. The plastic has worn off and now they are real people.

But really, I don't think I would go to a reunion. Those people are few in number compared to the size of my class, and while we are on friendly terms, I don't consider them a best friend, they are still acquaintances, I just have a bit more in common with them and have known them for years. They still aren't the people I would call if I lived in that town and needed a ride if my car broke down. There's no longer that high school clique animosity, but there isn't any real friendship either.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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27-02-2015, 10:23 PM (This post was last modified: 28-02-2015 07:44 AM by Anjele.)
RE: Need some input regarding a reunion...
Well, I got my official invitation a week or so ago. At the bottom of it was an announcement that word would come out later regarding a mass and a golf outing. I don't mass or golf.

I have looked into booking a room for quite a while and everything in my hometown is booked. For some reason our reunion is always about the same time as some big farm toy event. I only have one relative left in town and I wouldn't want to put him out by asking if I could stay at his house.

It sunk in that if I have to talk myself into making the trip, I don't really need, or want, to go.

Guess I really feel like I can't go home again. Undecided I suppose that means it's no longer home.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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27-02-2015, 11:40 PM
RE: Need some input regarding a reunion...
(27-02-2015 10:23 PM)Anjele Wrote:  Well, I got my official invitation a week or so ago. At the bottom of it was an announcement that word would come out later regarding a mass and a gold outing. I don't mass or golf.

I have looked into booking a room for quite a while and everything in my hometown is booked. For some reason our reunion is always about the same time as some big farm toy event. I only have one relative left in town and I wouldn't want to put him out by asking if I could stay at his house.

It sunk in that if I have to talk myself into making the trip, I don't really need, or want, to go.

Guess I really feel like I can't go home again. Undecided I suppose that means it's no longer home.

It happens. Hug


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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28-02-2015, 12:42 AM
RE: Need some input regarding a reunion...
My 10 year high school reunion was last year. It took place a few miles from my current house. I didn't go. I figure if I haven't stayed in touch (I haven't) it's because I don't really want to. Most of the people I went to school with wound up being junkies and thieves anyway. The ones that didn't I wouldn't mind saying 'Hello' to, but it's not worth spending an evening on either, at least not to me; To each their own though.

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28-02-2015, 08:08 AM
RE: Need some input regarding a reunion...
I went to my 35 year reunion a couple years ago. Booooring..... I got waylaid by a whacko that my older sister was friends with (sorta) - and she's a clingy, ditsy "born again" type christmonger --- and she wanted to talk my ear off....

The really horrid part?? She got REALLY good looking.

My girlfriend was amused as hell.

We ended up only staying a half hour or so - then said we had to go get cigarettes...... I don't smoke......


Whatever you think the reunion will be like --- it's pretty unlikely that's it........

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28-02-2015, 08:23 AM
RE: Need some input regarding a reunion...
(28-02-2015 08:08 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  I went to my 35 year reunion a couple years ago. Booooring..... I got waylaid by a whacko that my older sister was friends with (sorta) - and she's a clingy, ditsy "born again" type christmonger --- and she wanted to talk my ear off....

The really horrid part?? She got REALLY good looking.

My girlfriend was amused as hell.

We ended up only staying a half hour or so - then said we had to go get cigarettes...... I don't smoke......


Whatever you think the reunion will be like --- it's pretty unlikely that's it........

I graduated from Catholic school - part of the 'festivities' include mass...then getting drunk and trying to act 17 again though with an earlier bed time than back then. I have been to a few over the years and that's exactly what it will be like.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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28-02-2015, 08:37 AM
RE: Need some input regarding a reunion...
I would be more likely to consider going to mine if they were more casual like Hafnof described. My reunions always try to be formal events....um, no thanks. I might be mire willing to grab a few drinks, but not to spend $ on a fancy dress, shoes, dinner plus travel, hotel....nope, not my style, and certainly not worth it for one night for a bunch that I rarely talk to.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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28-02-2015, 01:12 PM
RE: Need some input regarding a reunion...
I think I will finally attend a reunion when I'm 90. That should filter out most of the people I don't need to see.

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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