New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
28-11-2013, 02:04 PM
New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
Hello,

I'm a husband and a father of three. I married in the church (Reformed) and had my kids baptized. I was really hardcore deep into theology and apologetics. I even had (and still have a youtube channel dedicated to Christian hymns). I even wanted at one point to homeschool my kids but due to financial issues could not. Due to a period of unstability in my marriage and my obsesion with christianity I ended in the hospital twice due to religious delusions (persecutory and delusions of grandeur). I was diagnosed with organic psychosis and have to take antipsychotic meds for 5 years. This all happened almost 2 years ago. After all this I lost my job (was demoted) due to depression and poor performance and hit a low point, it was then that i started to give atheism a look. I flirted with atheism for a while, even though I was still attending church yet no longer catechising my kids as I was supposed to. I came out to my wife in a visit from one of the elders in regards to our church attendance. When I told them I was seriously considering whether better explanations of the new testament were mental health related (was Jesus deluded? did Paul have psychosis?) but I was met with condescention and claims that I was trying to "make sense" of my psychosis.

Things have gotten much better with my wife, she has never been very devout anyways. She had issues with my extreme relisiosity before but after I came out as an atheist she thought I had become a different person, but pledged to stay with me because she thought I was still traumatized from my psychotic episode.

I am new to atheism and since I've been in the church since very young, I dont know any atheists myself except a cousin who lives in Germany with whom I used to argue for Christianity. I dont really have much time to socialize since I have a big family with young kids that need my time up here in Toronto but I would like to know if any of you have gone through a similar situation. According to my phychiatrist it's very common to have a religious delusion and become really uncofortable with church, religion, etc as a result.

Cheers

“The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.” ― Richard Pryor
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 4 users Like djkamilo's post
28-11-2013, 02:14 PM
RE: New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
Welcome to TTA.

Sorry for your problems Hug
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Momsurroundedbyboys's post
28-11-2013, 03:09 PM
RE: New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
(28-11-2013 02:14 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  Welcome to TTA.

Sorry for your problems Hug

Thanks!

“The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.” ― Richard Pryor
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes djkamilo's post
28-11-2013, 03:26 PM
RE: New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
(28-11-2013 02:04 PM)djkamilo Wrote:  Hello,

I'm a husband and a father of three. I married in the church (Reformed) and had my kids baptized. I was really hardcore deep into theology and apologetics. I even had (and still have a youtube channel dedicated to Christian hymns). I even wanted at one point to homeschool my kids but due to financial issues could not. Due to a period of unstability in my marriage and my obsesion with christianity I ended in the hospital twice due to religious delusions (persecutory and delusions of grandeur). I was diagnosed with organic psychosis and have to take antipsychotic meds for 5 years. This all happened almost 2 years ago. After all this I lost my job (was demoted) due to depression and poor performance and hit a low point, it was then that i started to give atheism a look. I flirted with atheism for a while, even though I was still attending church yet no longer catechising my kids as I was supposed to. I came out to my wife in a visit from one of the elders in regards to our church attendance. When I told them I was seriously considering whether better explanations of the new testament were mental health related (was Jesus deluded? did Paul have psychosis?) but I was met with condescention and claims that I was trying to "make sense" of my psychosis.

Things have gotten much better with my wife, she has never been very devout anyways. She had issues with my extreme relisiosity before but after I came out as an atheist she thought I had become a different person, but pledged to stay with me because she thought I was still traumatized from my psychotic episode.

I am new to atheism and since I've been in the church since very young, I dont know any atheists myself except a cousin who lives in Germany with whom I used to argue for Christianity. I dont really have much time to socialize since I have a big family with young kids that need my time up here in Toronto but I would like to know if any of you have gone through a similar situation. According to my phychiatrist it's very common to have a religious delusion and become really uncofortable with church, religion, etc as a result.

Cheers

I have seen quite a few people here who were at various stages of this phenomenon.

Perhaps you were so strongly indoctrinated that the occasional, stray doubt ended up triggering psychotic episodes.

It can be very difficult to lose something held near and dear - in this case, god. It can cause the same issues as losing a mate of 50 years, it leaves holes in daily life and that is the trigger for real grief. For many people it's like the carpet has been pulled out from under them.

I am glad to hear you are doing better now. I hope you will find answers to some of your questions here.

[Image: dobie.png]

Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like Dom's post
28-11-2013, 03:28 PM
RE: New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
Personally, I do think Saul of Tarsus did suffer from delusions.

The sun rises in the West and the bird shits on the coffeetable.


Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Momsurroundedbyboys's post
28-11-2013, 03:47 PM
RE: New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
Welcome to the forum Smile

Can't really offer you anything other than fried baby, but hope you'll find what you're looking for here Smile

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
28-11-2013, 03:53 PM
RE: New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
Welcome!

See here they are, the bruises, some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
28-11-2013, 04:15 PM
RE: New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
Thanks guys I appreciate it

“The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.” ― Richard Pryor
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
28-11-2013, 04:18 PM
RE: New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
(28-11-2013 03:28 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  Personally, I do think Saul of Tarsus did suffer from delusions.

I do too as well. As I've been there in the middle of delusions and how real they appear to be Paul seems to fit the bill so well for psychosis, I could see how I could've made the same statements he made in the middle of my episode

“The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.” ― Richard Pryor
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
28-11-2013, 04:19 PM
RE: New to Atheism after struggling with mental health issues
(28-11-2013 03:47 PM)morondog Wrote:  Welcome to the forum Smile

Can't really offer you anything other than fried baby, but hope you'll find what you're looking for here Smile

Thanks

“The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.” ― Richard Pryor
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes djkamilo's post
Post Reply
Forum Jump: