Noah's Ark, again
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08-09-2013, 06:08 PM
RE: Noah's Ark, again
Here is quite probably the most exhaustive compilation of arguments against the possibility of the ark story. Pass it along to any fool who still thinks it happened.



(08-09-2013 02:27 AM)EvolutionKills Wrote:  Also, if this were true, then it would require a type of 'hyper evolution' to account for all of the biodiversity from such a limited pool of species. If you must take two of each kind of bear, you don't break evolution, but the logistics become impossible. If however you want to believe that Noah only took two 'bears' and those two are responsible for Black Bears, Brown Bears, Polar Bears, Grizzly Bears, Pandas, etc. Well then, now the logistics might work, but now you have to endorse un-scientifically verifiable 'hyper evolution', essentially macro-evolution (speciation) on an incredibly short time scale. Laughat

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Not only would they have to speciate very rapidly, but additional magic would be necessary to actually keep them alive. Working from such a narrow gene pool, that level of inbreeding would manifest all sorts of disorders and overall weaknesses of every animal.

With all of the magic required to make this myth plausible, wouldn't it have been easier for a god, any god, to simply target humans with a plague or heart attacks? Perhaps ol' Yahweh was just using Earth as a Rube Goldberg machine to kill humans in the most elaborate, illogical way conceivable.

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08-09-2013, 09:34 PM
RE: Noah's Ark, again
(08-09-2013 06:08 PM)Jeffasaurus Wrote:  Not only would they have to speciate very rapidly, but additional magic would be necessary to actually keep them alive. Working from such a narrow gene pool, that level of inbreeding would manifest all sorts of disorders and overall weaknesses of every animal.

With all of the magic required to make this myth plausible, wouldn't it have been easier for a god, any god, to simply target humans with a plague or heart attacks? Perhaps ol' Yahweh was just using Earth as a Rube Goldberg machine to kill humans in the most elaborate, illogical way conceivable.

Not only that, but the merest glimpse at other flood myths makes it pretty obvious the Noah's Ark story is just a copied version of an earlier equally erroneous fable.
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08-09-2013, 10:46 PM
RE: Noah's Ark, again
Well, you all just .... just wait till my daddy gets home PleasyJebus gets here tomorrow, when he gets back to work, sitting around at the office. He'll s'plain all this Noah shit to ya'll. You just need to say the "spell"/incantation , "Jebus is lard", and all will be well in your little worlds. Say it with me now.

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08-09-2013, 11:05 PM
RE: Noah's Ark, again
(08-09-2013 10:46 PM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  Well, you all just .... just wait till my daddy gets home PleasyJebus gets here tomorrow, when he gets back to work, sitting around at the office. He'll s'plain all this Noah shit to ya'll. You just need to say the "spell"/incantation , "Jebus is lard", and all will be well in your little worlds. Say it with me now.


"Jebus is Lard"

What was the point of me saying that again? Undecided

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08-09-2013, 11:15 PM
RE: Noah's Ark, again
(08-09-2013 11:05 PM)EvolutionKills Wrote:  
(08-09-2013 10:46 PM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  Well, you all just .... just wait till my daddy gets home PleasyJebus gets here tomorrow, when he gets back to work, sitting around at the office. He'll s'plain all this Noah shit to ya'll. You just need to say the "spell"/incantation , "Jebus is lard", and all will be well in your little worlds. Say it with me now.


"Jebus is Lard"

What was the point of me saying that again? Undecided

You may now pass to the next grade at Hogwarts. You pass simple spells.

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08-09-2013, 11:22 PM
RE: Noah's Ark, again
(08-09-2013 11:15 PM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  You may now pass to the next grade at Hogwarts. You pass simple spells.

COOL! Thumbsup

So when do we start learning how to throw around 6d6 Fireballs around? Consider

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09-09-2013, 12:16 AM (This post was last modified: 09-09-2013 12:35 AM by Reltzik.)
RE: Noah's Ark, again
(08-09-2013 11:22 PM)EvolutionKills Wrote:  
(08-09-2013 11:15 PM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  You may now pass to the next grade at Hogwarts. You pass simple spells.

COOL! Thumbsup

So when do we start learning how to throw around 6d6 Fireballs around? Consider

When you figure out a way to hollow out six-sided dice and coat their interiors with something capable of containing dioxygen-diflouride. Thumbsup

Don't supercool it, that's for wusses. Also, if you DO try this at home, I'm not liable for the damages.

EDIT: Quoted before I found a better link and made changes. CURSES.
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09-09-2013, 12:22 AM
RE: Noah's Ark, again
(09-09-2013 12:16 AM)Reltzik Wrote:  
(08-09-2013 11:22 PM)EvolutionKills Wrote:  COOL! Thumbsup

So when do we start learning how to throw around 6d6 Fireballs around? Consider

When you figure out a way to hollow out six-sided dice and coat their interiors with something capable of containing dioxygen-diflouride. Thumbsup

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09-09-2013, 09:56 AM
RE: Noah's Ark, again
(08-09-2013 12:28 PM)dancefortwo Wrote:  
(06-09-2013 02:07 PM)PleaseJesus Wrote:  1) The topography in the pre-Noahic world was arguably far less striated. When water covered the tops of the mountains it wasn't that great a depth of water. 2) There was tremendous loss of life on land and sea alike--we see many species disappear in the Flood and immediate post-Flood world. There are great extinctions in the record, say scholars, just as they've certified explosions of new life in relatively shorter periods of time.

PS. You wrote there is tons of stuff about the absurdity of the ark, is there a thread somewhere here about the positives in the biblical ark record? The stability of the craft with those dimensions, etc? You know--a balanced view even if you find more details are con than pro.

In Greenland scientists extracted ice cores from 20 different locations in vast ice sheets going almost two miles down into the ice. There are 12,000 annual layers of ice going back to 120,000 years in each core sample. It records many of the well known events that have befallen the Earth. In the year 79 CE (Common Era) Mt. Vesuvius in Italy blew it's top and volcanic ash encircled the earth. They can find this in the ice cores extracted from the ice and the ice dates corresponds precisely with the date of the Vesuvius explosion which was recorded by writers in 79 CE.

The almost two mile deep ice extractions show annual warming and cooling of the weather. Storms, dry spells etc. There was no recent flood 6000 years ago. In going back further through the ice layers to 120,000 years ago, no evidence of a great flood has been seen and that's because..... IT DIDN'T HAPPEN.

Scientists do the same thing with layers of rock going back millions of years. There was no flood because........ IT DIDN'T HAPPEN.

It's a common myth. American Indians have similar stories in their myths as do other cultures.

Not sure where you got "12,000 annual layers". Consider

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09-09-2013, 11:30 AM
RE: Noah's Ark, again
(09-09-2013 09:56 AM)Chas Wrote:  
(08-09-2013 12:28 PM)dancefortwo Wrote:  In Greenland scientists extracted ice cores from 20 different locations in vast ice sheets going almost two miles down into the ice. There are 12,000 annual layers of ice going back to 120,000 years in each core sample. It records many of the well known events that have befallen the Earth. In the year 79 CE (Common Era) Mt. Vesuvius in Italy blew it's top and volcanic ash encircled the earth. They can find this in the ice cores extracted from the ice and the ice dates corresponds precisely with the date of the Vesuvius explosion which was recorded by writers in 79 CE.

The almost two mile deep ice extractions show annual warming and cooling of the weather. Storms, dry spells etc. There was no recent flood 6000 years ago. In going back further through the ice layers to 120,000 years ago, no evidence of a great flood has been seen and that's because..... IT DIDN'T HAPPEN.

Scientists do the same thing with layers of rock going back millions of years. There was no flood because........ IT DIDN'T HAPPEN.

It's a common myth. American Indians have similar stories in their myths as do other cultures.

Not sure where you got "12,000 annual layers". Consider

I think he meant to say 120,000.
Ice cores are interesting, (and of course another piece of proof there was no world-wide flood). http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ice_core

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Those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music - Friedrich Nietzsche
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