Obsession with Sexual Purity
Post Reply
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
12-09-2011, 09:10 AM
RE: Obsession with Sexual Purity
My views on the topic here is that it's first and foremost about power and control.

As several of you have already pointed out, to control at least half the congregation like this would mean there's a lot less opposition from the women since their self confidence and self-worth must be quite low. I would also guess that it would minimize the opposition from the men in the congregation since they would reap all the benefits (if you can call them such) from being the master of the home and to be able to more or less command their wives. I guess this has more to do with the general misogynistic views in the bible than the sexual purity, but I think they're interconnected...

Hasn't there almost always been a tradition of suppressing women in the western cultures (and a lot of other cultures of course)?
My guess is that it goes far back in time when to physical strength was one of our primary methods of showing who should be the ruler of the group, once men had control they wouldn't give it up without a fight and therefore they (or should I say we?) used any means they could to keep in power. Of course this is a lot of speculation on my part, in the old Nordic mythologies the women had a stronger position and I think they had more say in the villages before Christianity was introduced.

What always makes me wonder a bit in the debate about how women should dress and act (lots of clothing, being modest etc.) is that part of the reason being used is that they should dress like this as to not make men sexually aroused... So basically they are saying that men can't control their actions if there's a woman showing her ankle in the room, therefore women should cover themselves Rolleyes

Anyway, I'm not sure if I actually contributed so much to this topic, but it's an interesting subject and now I'm subscribing so I can see if there's more thoughtful comments Smile
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
13-09-2011, 02:43 PM
RE: Obsession with Sexual Purity
While I fully agree with Mark Fulton's point about Paul being a misogynist, I am not so sure about what is being discussed here about oppression of women.
Well, maybe that's also because the idea that women have been oppressed for thousands of years is now being massively abused everywhere, and I suspect the feminism in being a religion of some sort Wink

Back on topic, I believe that historically there are various important reasons for religions to fight sexuality. First, because sex is a lot about loss of self-control. You have this drive from the inside; it is hardly understandable; it has a great power and you can hardly do anything about it; it leads you to doing things you won't normally do; therefore, it must be something non-human, something either from God or from Satan. An inexperienced and uneducated person often does not understand what and why he/she is doing before and during an intercourse; hence a feeling of guilt or shame afterwards; this feeling must be a punishment from God; thus sex is a sin.

Second, this great and hardly controlled power of our replication instinct also distracts one from concentrating on the lofty matters, as it was pointed out by Ava_Rose and Mark Fulton in the very beginning of this thread. Therefore, in order to survive and evolve, a religion has to take control of this power. The paradox Ava_Rose mentioned about religions being however sexually charged, I believe it's a simple consequence of the desire for the forbidden fruit, which is an integral part of our nature. Think the notorious cases of paedophilia amongst Catholic priests.

Third, since the church needs to control people's mindset, it just needs them to obey. So it will try to intervene into anything: what to wear, what to eat, what to say, which position to take during a prayer, which position to take during sex, with whom to have sex, whether to have sex at all. Everything is a little compliance lesson; all put together makes you develop a habit of doing what you're told.

Fourth, many of those who adhere to religion in adult years (not those raised religious from childhood) are people with relationship problems. There are men and women who have lacked attention from the opposite sex throughout their lives; there are men and women who suffered from a nasty breakup; there are people who just have physical or mental issues that affect their love life. These people need the church to comfort them; the church needs them to let their armies grow.

I'm sure we can come up with more reasons, but I'm done for today.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
14-10-2011, 07:12 AM
RE: Obsession with Sexual Purity
I think sexual purity is a good idea so long as it is not brought to the extreme and unfairly used to punish a person.

Without some sort of calibration of what is acceptable we will and have become sexually obsessed. That is the other extreme of course. Toothpaste advert = a women in her underwear. Children’s clothing with sexy written on them etc. Without some sort norm sex becomes a dangerous weapon.

Purity to me sounds a bit creepy but I personally think the fewer sexual partners the better and the older you are with your first sexual encounter the better also. This gives you more control rather than being peer pressured.

The fewer partners you have the less likely it is that a current relationship can become ruined by a past relationship. The jealous ex-lover who cannot let go. How about the one night stand that led to a sexual disease. Fewer partners lower this risk.
Also who wants to think of their lover with a load of ex-lovers. Human minds conjour all sorts of scenarios leading to jealously and separation.

I suppose the purpose of purity is to protect women from a man who will use and abuse, get her pregnant and leave. That’s why the fathers were and still are asked permission. Dad usually checks out the new boyfriend. This is to make sure he is a good person. Obviously no man is good enough for daddy’s princess. It’s a nice tradition but can be a bit intimidating. It does place women in a weaker position in some senses but speaking as a man I know other men who will lie, seduce and romance a girl to get her legs opened. As a man I can recognise this snake like quality. It a protective instinct in men, I think it’s called benevolent sexism.

I ask the question to women, have you been conned or romanced by Mr. Perfect until he got you into bed and then he bolts?

With regards to marriage, I personally view it as a serious union between two people. The benefits of this are obvious from both a social and legal stand point. A decent man will marry a woman especially if they would like children. I have seen the unmarried woman have children leaving herself vulnerable both socially i.e. the man can just walk out and inheritance wise, she is not automatically entitled to land or pensions.

I am on an atheist forum so in my posts I will not mention God too much but one aspect of marriage is to bring blessings on a couple. Also from a mans point of view he makes the promise publicly so he takes it seriously. It’s not a guarantee but it helps.

The saving yourself for Jesus thing is very complicated, but some people just get more comfort out of Jesus than with a partner. Also lack of sexual desire or sexual energy can be used to create or work more and let’s face it its a lot less complicated. Ultimately is a personal and spiritual calling.

I watched the Virgin Daughters documentary, again, I like the idea of purity but I would not be a fan of ostracising a woman who had a child out of wedlock. It seems unnecessary cruel and unfair.

I recommend Simone de Beauvoir's book, The Second Sex to get a handle on women’s history and social growth.
Quote this message in a reply
Post Reply
Forum Jump: