Offensive Joke Thread
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13-12-2015, 04:24 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
(03-09-2015 07:37 AM)Can_of_Beans Wrote:  
(03-09-2015 07:34 AM)Nurse Wrote:  I couldn't figure out what was opposed to "down"...

Soooo Santa goes down the chimney, while Jews go in it. Got it.

Almost...Jews go in the oven, and then they go up the chimney.

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew????
The pizza doesn't bitch about being put in the oven!
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13-12-2015, 04:26 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
Well it would not be Pontias Pilate and the Nail driving Five!
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13-12-2015, 04:44 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
I dedicated my life to getting underaged prostitutes off the streets.

Usually for about an hour at the time.

. . . ................................ ......................................... . [Image: 2dsmnow.gif] Eat at Joe's
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13-12-2015, 04:50 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
(12-06-2015 09:06 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  What's the difference between a boat and a woman???


A boat is a hole in the water into which you pour money......



(ducks)

WHat's the difference between a Nun on her knees and a whore in the bathtub? The Nun has hope in her soul!
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13-12-2015, 04:54 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
Hear about the suicide magic carpet company selling shares. Prophets going through the roof guaranteed!
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13-12-2015, 05:21 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
This19th century miner gets into town every few years. One day in town he buys his supplies and still has $9.80. He asks the shop owner if there are any whores in town. The store owner points out the window and says there are both of them right there. Bonnie the white girl just got out of jail, Suzzie the black babe charges a bit more, but has a reputation that she is worth it. So our miner goes out and says "Hi Suzzie, What is the going rate?"
"$10.00 " she responds
I only have $9.80 will that do it?"
"NO sorry, maybe Bonnie will do it for that."
Bonnie says yes and they go off and do their thing.
17 years later The miner gets back to town for the first time. The store owner now has expanded and has a small restaurant. Store owner says to Miner. " Remember that whore you did?"
"Yes, not bad either."
"Well she got pregnant and you have a son who is now sixteen years old!"
"No couldn't be."
"But it is! she was fresh out of jail and only had you before being put back in jail. The boy is your son! For sure. He works for me washing dishes in the restaurant."
So he asks to meet his son.
"So you are my dad, huh?"
"That is what the man says."
"So what am I?"
"What are you what do you mean?"
"Well Bob is Irish and Pete is English and Pierre is French. So what am I?"
The miner says "Well I am Jewish, so I guess that makes you a Jew."
"A damn Jew! What could be worse!"
"Shut up kid if I had had 20 more cents you would be a nigger!"
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13-12-2015, 05:30 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
Be careful to run everything through Spellcheck. One wrong letter and your post is urined!
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13-12-2015, 06:20 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
(31-10-2012 03:36 PM)Chas Wrote:  
(31-10-2012 03:24 PM)Free Thought Wrote:  Yeah, well.. Some people believe that doves blood cures leprosy and I find that offensively stupid, does that mean this small rant is justified within this thread?
Hell no, wrong place wrong time!

Doves' blood works, but only homeopathicly.

You mean just on us homos?
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13-12-2015, 06:29 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
(18-11-2012 02:46 PM)HereticHick Wrote:  What do they call a book in Texas:

Target practice

What do they call a book in Arkansas:

Kindling

What do they call a book in Mississippi:

Door stop

Not really offensive unless possibly you live in one of these states

How do we know the tooth brush was invented in Tennessee? Anywhere else they would have called it a teeth brush!
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13-12-2015, 07:48 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
(05-06-2014 05:40 PM)Can_of_Beans Wrote:  Q. Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand?

A. So she can moan with the other

Ya know why women have two sets of lips? So they can piss and moan at the same time!
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