Offensive Joke Thread
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15-01-2017, 01:20 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink, and while he's drinking, the monkey jumps all over the place, eating everything behind the bar. Then the monkey jumps on to the pool table and swallows a billiard ball.

The bartender screams at the guy, "Your monkey just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!" "Sorry," replied the guy. "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. I'll pay for everything." The man finishes his drink, pays and leaves.

Two weeks later, he's in the bar with his pet monkey, again. He orders a drink, and the monkey starts running around the bar. The monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his ass, pulls it out and eats it. The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks. "Yeah," replies the guy. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures stuff first."

I'm a creationist... I believe that man created God.
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15-01-2017, 04:43 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
A little black Jewish boy says to his daddy, "Dad am I more black or Jewish?"
"Why do you ask?", says the Dad.
The boy says, "Well a guy at school has a bike for sale for $150 and I can't decide if I want to haggle him down to $100 or just steal it."

I kid, I kid Bechased

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23-01-2017, 01:21 PM
Offensive Joke Thread
This might offend you if you are a pirate.

Pirate walks in a bar.

Bartender looks at him and does a double take. "Is that a steering wheel in your pants?"

"Arrrrge the pirate says, its driving me nuts"
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23-01-2017, 04:12 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
Donald Trump is President of the United States of America.

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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23-01-2017, 05:45 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
I'm sorry and I apologize mean the same thing.... except when you are at a funeral.
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23-01-2017, 06:30 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
(23-01-2017 04:12 PM)Chas Wrote:  Donald Trump is President of the United States of America.

This is so disgusting I almost flagged it. Evil_monster
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11-03-2017, 08:55 PM (This post was last modified: 11-03-2017 10:10 PM by Revenant77x.)
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
[Image: sizzle-album-racism-573182361967452160-Twitter.png]

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07-04-2017, 04:37 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
Guy: Ya know, I really don't understand why people are so angry with women teachers having sex with their male students, that's gotta be every teenage boys' dream!

Friend: So...do you also think it's okay for girl students to have sex with their male teachers?

Guy: No...But I had sex with my teacher and it was the greatest thing that ever happened to me...

Friend: Dude...weren't you home schooled?

Blink

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"If we're going to be damned, let's be damned for what we really are." - Captain Picard
7!
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22-04-2017, 11:27 AM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
Australian Telephone Operator: "G'day mate, Helpline here. What's the problem?"

Caller: "I'm in the Outback with the girlfriend and she's been stung on her thigh by a hornet and now her vagina has completely closed up!"

Australian Telephone Operator: "Bummer!"

Caller: "Great advice! Thanks mate, 'bye.
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21-06-2017, 02:10 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
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The first revolt is against the supreme tyranny of theology, of the phantom of God. As long as we have a master in heaven, we will be slaves on earth.

Mikhail Bakunin.
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