Offensive Joke Thread
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24-08-2013, 02:02 PM
RE: The offensive jokes thread
When a prostitute gets sexually assaulted, is it considered rape or shoplifting?


Recently Obama critized Fox News for not having enough blacks & latinos on their network. Fox responded by airing two more hours a week of America's Most Wanted.

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"If we're going to be damned, let's be damned for what we really are." - Captain Picard
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24-08-2013, 02:35 PM
RE: The offensive jokes thread
I am offended
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24-08-2013, 04:14 PM
RE: The offensive jokes thread
(24-08-2013 02:35 PM)BrokenQuill92 Wrote:  I am offended

Then I guess you shouldn't hang around in this thread in the future.

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"Don't answer that. A rhetorical question."
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25-08-2013, 01:46 PM
RE: The offensive jokes thread
I have a few. Hopefully none of them have been posted here yet.

What's worse than ten babies nailed to one tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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How do you get six hundred Jews into a tiny car? The ash tray.

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How do you dry a black person off after a shower? You hang it.

---

What's worse than one dead baby? A sack full of dead babies. Wanna know what's worse than that? The one at the bottoms still alive. Wanna know what's even worse than that? He had to eat his way out.
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25-08-2013, 02:19 PM
RE: The offensive jokes thread
What sits in the corner getting smaller and smaller?

A toddler combing its hair with a potato peeler.

How do you fit a baby in a jar?

By using a blender.

How do you get the baby out again?

Doritos.

How does Muffs know when his sister is on her period?

When his dads dick tastes of blood.

I feel so much, and yet I feel nothing.
I am a rock, I am the sky, the birds and the trees and everything beyond.
I am the wind, in the fields in which I roar. I am the water, in which I drown.
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23-09-2013, 06:40 PM
RE: The offensive jokes thread
The kids filed back into class Monday morning. They were very excited. Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on productive salesmanship.

Little Sally led off: "I sold girl scout cookies and I made $30," she said proudly, "My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success."

"Very good," said the teacher.

Little Jenny was next: "I sold magazines," she said, "I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them up on current events."

"Very good, Jenny," said the teacher.

Eventually, it was Little Johnny's turn. The teacher held her breath.

Little Johnny walked to the front of the classroom and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher's desk. "$2,467," he said.

"$2,467!" cried the teacher, "What in the world were you selling?"

"Toothbrushes," said Little Johnny.

"Toothbrushes," echoed the teacher, "How could you possibly sell enough tooth brushes to make that much money?"

"I found the busiest corner in town," said Little Johnny, "I set up a Dip & Chip stand. I gave everybody who walked by a sample. They all said the same thing, "Hey, this tastes like shit!"

Then I would say, "It is shit. Wanna buy a toothbrush?"

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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23-09-2013, 06:49 PM
RE: The offensive jokes thread
Okay, most offensive joke ever. *ahem* Here we go:

Absols.

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23-09-2013, 06:57 PM
RE: The offensive jokes thread
Absols walks in a bar and asks a beer "fucker drink me facts truth evil bitch beer good night douchebag"
bartender says "fuck you fag" and shoots hom in the ass

I don't really like going outside.
It's too damn "peopley" out there....
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23-09-2013, 07:00 PM
RE: The offensive jokes thread
(23-09-2013 06:57 PM)Lightvader Wrote:  Absols walks in a bar and asks a beer "fucker drink me facts truth evil bitch beer good night douchebag"
bartender says "fuck you fag" and shoots hom in the ass

Pure poetry. Big Grin

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27-09-2013, 05:01 AM
I was dating a girl with a lazy eye.
I told her we had to break up because she was seeing too many people on the side.



Drinking Beverage
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