Offensive Joke Thread
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10-08-2015, 09:18 AM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
(10-08-2015 08:09 AM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  
(10-08-2015 08:07 AM)Slowminded Wrote:  Gipsy man and a woman walking out of the courtroom after getting a divorce.

She says: So, we are not husband and wife any more.
-Yup, that's true.
-But...we are still brother and sister, right?

Would be funnier if you said they were coming out of a court in Alabama. Weeping

Yes, I can see that now.

Let me fix that...

A man and a women in Alabama sitting at the dinner table, man says : We've been trough so much together, first you were my daughter, then my wife and now my mother in law.

. . . ................................ ......................................... . [Image: 2dsmnow.gif] Eat at Joe's
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10-08-2015, 10:03 AM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
(10-08-2015 08:09 AM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  
(10-08-2015 08:07 AM)Slowminded Wrote:  Gipsy man and a woman walking out of the courtroom after getting a divorce.

She says: So, we are not husband and wife any more.
-Yup, that's true.
-But...we are still brother and sister, right?

Would be funnier if you said they were coming out of a court in Alabama. Weeping

Or West Virginia...

[Image: last-names.jpg]

"I feel as though the camera is almost a kind of voyeur in Mr. Beans life, and you just watch this bizarre man going about his life in the way that he wants to."

-Rowan Atkinson
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11-08-2015, 02:17 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
What did the banana say to the vibrator?

Why are you shaking? I'm the one she's going to eat!

(22-08-2015 07:30 PM)Revenant77x Wrote:  It is by will alone I set my brows in motion it is by the conditioner of avocado that the brows acquire volume the skin acquires spots the spots become a warning. It is by will alone I set my brows in motion.
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11-08-2015, 02:36 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
Guy pulls into a diner.
The chalkboard lists the day's specials:

Grilled Cheese Sandwich $5
Handjob $10

He says to the disgruntled middle-aged woman behind the counter, "Are you the one who gives the handjobs?"
With an exasperated tone she fires back, "Yeah, Sweetie."

He says, "Then go wash your hands and make me a grilled cheese sandwich."
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11-08-2015, 04:17 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
What's the difference between tires and black people?

Tires don't start singing when you put chains on them.
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11-08-2015, 06:15 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
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I hope that the world turns, and things get better. But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you. - V for Vendetta
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11-08-2015, 11:11 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
Alright, I have a few more...

Why do white people own pets?
Because it's not legal for then to own people anymore.

What do you call a kindergartner with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.

What is the Jew's biggest problem today?
Free ham.

How many police does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just beat the room for being black.

On a scale of Michael Jackson to Casey Anthony, how much do you love kids?

What's the difference between your wife and your girlfriend?
50 lbs.
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11-08-2015, 11:17 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
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"If you keep trying to better yourself that's enough for me. We don't decide which hand we are dealt in life, but we make the decision to play it or fold it" - Nishi Karano Kaze
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12-08-2015, 06:10 AM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
The judge says to a double-homicide defendant, "You're charged with beating your wife to death with a hammer."

A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out, "You bastard!"

The judge says, "You're also charged with beating your mother-in-law to death with a hammer."

The voice in the back of the courtroom yells out, "You bastard!"

The judge stops and says to the guy in the back of the courtroom, "Sir, I can understand your anger and frustration at this crime. But no more outbursts from you, or I'll charge you with contempt. Is that understood?"

The guy in the back of the court stands up and says, "I'm sorry, Your Honour, but for fifteen years, I've lived next door to that bastard, and every time I asked to borrow a hammer, he said he didn't have one."

"I feel as though the camera is almost a kind of voyeur in Mr. Beans life, and you just watch this bizarre man going about his life in the way that he wants to."

-Rowan Atkinson
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12-08-2015, 03:41 PM
RE: Offensive Joke Thread
What is the most positive thing in harlem? HIV.

The first revolt is against the supreme tyranny of theology, of the phantom of God. As long as we have a master in heaven, we will be slaves on earth.

Mikhail Bakunin.
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