Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
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14-03-2011, 12:49 PM
 
Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
Mk, so.. I got a message from my church on facebook the other day. I doubt anybody here speaks portuguese, but i'll copy and paste anyways.

"Explosão na Dedham High School - No School tomorrow
Hoje às 2.15 da madrugada aconteceu uma grande explosão na biblioteca da escola. Tudo foi destruído pelo fogo, mas testemunhas garantem que viram pequenos livros saírem pelos seus próprios pés. Alguns garantem que os pequenos livros tinham olhos e até falavam uns com os outros. Muitos dizem que é impossível mas muitos acreditaram."

Translation:

Explosion at Dedham High School- No School tomorrow. (That's my school.)
Today at 2:15 AM, there was a massive explosion in the school library. Everything was destroyed by the fire, but witnesses say they saw small books walking out of the fire on their own two feet. Some even say the books had eyes and spoke to each other. Many say this is impossible, but many people believe it.

So, I didn't understand this at first, I was too excited at the thought of my library blowing up. Then, sadly, I realized they were mocking me for accepting evolution(therefor accepting the Big Bang, apparently). So of course, this means war.

I just want to note, I'm never abrasive about my views with anybody in the church. But they finally found out that I'm atheist. I've avoided the topic for years, but they asked me directly, and i refuse to lie and pretend to be a theist. But yea, anyways..

I don't know jack about the Big Bang. I replied with the following:

Quote:Charles De Farias
...what?

20 hours agoCharles De Farias
Oh, I get it. Well, that's very strange indeed. Usually when an explosion of this magnitude occurs, it doesn't produce anything other than destruction.
What would be more plausible, however, would be a catastrophic explosion with a force a million times that of an explosion in a library. Then, if a piece of one of the book stands were launched into space and travelled around aimllessly, there's a big chance that they'll come across a large orb of energy that might have been ejected form the massive explosion as well.

20 hours agoCharles De Farias
Now, with the gravitational pull from the massive orb of energy, the book stand will revolve around the ball of energy, generating heat. At first, the books will mostly just burn and fires will erupt throughout the stands, but this burning of books will create both soot and gasses. If you were to wait a few billion years, there's a chance that an atmosphere will form, along with a more roundly shaped bookstand that has a sort of soil created by the constant burning of books. You'll have to wait a a few years still, but eventually, with all of the original books all burned into ashes and turned into sediment and soil and the gasses that they gave off turning into an atmosphere that alters the way the energy from the orb of energy hits this book stand, maybe now there's a chance that you get a possibility for life. With this budding atmosphere, you're actually starting to get some weather. After years and years of nothing happening except for occasional storms, by chance, an electrical current goes through some of the soil/material on the book stand (that's now a planet). This happens ALLLL the time, but usually, nothing happens. On this particular day, however, the electrical current struck a particular set of molecules and it ended up binding together, and suddenly, we have letters!

20 hours agoCharles De Farias
These letters are rather useless at first, just floating around and doing nothing. But as they interact with the molecules around them, they start to become more complex and once they gain the ability to replicate, then things get interesting. Now, these tiny clumps of letters keep replicating and replicating. They're not very good at it though, they always make mistakes. Sometimes, these mistakes have it so they do something different than they were meant to do. By chance, after so many mistakes, these tiny letters make a mistake that ends up giving the group of letters a little wall. Strangely, this wall actually protects that particular group of letters that made the mistake. So, since they're protected, these letters actually survive while the other letters burn and die. And because these letters survive, they replicate that mistake they made and make more letters with a wall.

So yeaaa, my response wasn't very scientifically accurate, I don't think. But hey, I tried.
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14-03-2011, 01:07 PM
RE: Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
That's a horrible joke on their part. If I was sent that, I probably would tell them I never cynically joke about horrible things happening due to their belief in god. EDIT: This is a rather untrue statement on my part whoops. I don't tell religious friends these jokes.
Your "the evolution of book world" theory is entertaining =p But yeah, I don't think there was really much point in giving it, since even a very factual account of what is known would be discarded by them.

But hey you've succeeded in entertaining me a bit so your actions are a success in at least one way.

I'm not a non believer, I believe in the possibility of anything. I just don't let the actuality of something be determined by a 3rd party.
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14-03-2011, 02:05 PM
RE: Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
I'm just going to ignore the assholary of your church and say the first thing that came to my mind after reading your post:

Heart I fucking love you Charles! Heart

When you likened the beginning of life to a jumbling together of letters (which where obviously already there, since it was a bookshelf) you blew my mind! One of the best ways it has EVER been put!

I want to rip off your superstitions and make passionate sense to you
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14-03-2011, 06:44 PM
 
RE: Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
Oh man, I thought my response was crappy and inaccurate. Glad you liked it!

And, this is why I hate religion. The people at my church are really good people and I like them for the most part, so it comes as a shock when they do things like this.
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14-03-2011, 08:24 PM
RE: Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
Why is it that you go to church? Have I missed this? Wink

My reason for being is to serve as a cat cushion. That is good enough for me. Wink
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14-03-2011, 08:49 PM
 
RE: Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
It's 'cause my parents want me to go. I mostly go out of respect for them, occasionally, i'm forced to go as well.
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14-03-2011, 10:05 PM
 
RE: Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
(14-03-2011 08:49 PM)Cdf50 Wrote:  It's 'cause my parents want me to go. I mostly go out of respect for them, occasionally, i'm forced to go as well.

I became out of the closet at age 18... So I feel for you having to listen to parents D=
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14-03-2011, 10:19 PM
RE: Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
(14-03-2011 08:49 PM)Cdf50 Wrote:  It's 'cause my parents want me to go. I mostly go out of respect for them, occasionally, i'm forced to go as well.

I see. My condolences. Wink

You seem to handle it all quite well though.

My reason for being is to serve as a cat cushion. That is good enough for me. Wink
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15-03-2011, 12:26 AM
RE: Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
(14-03-2011 12:49 PM)Cdf50 Wrote:  These letters are rather useless at first, just floating around and doing nothing. But as they interact with the molecules around them, they start to become more complex and once they gain the ability to replicate, then things get interesting. Now, these tiny clumps of letters keep replicating and replicating. They're not very good at it though, they always make mistakes. Sometimes, these mistakes have it so they do something different than they were meant to do. By chance, after so many mistakes, these tiny letters make a mistake that ends up giving the group of letters a little wall. Strangely, this wall actually protects that particular group of letters that made the mistake. So, since they're protected, these letters actually survive while the other letters burn and die. And because these letters survive, they replicate that mistake they made and make more letters with a wall.

Is this how the bible was created?

When I find myself in times of trouble, Richard Dawkins comes to me, speaking words of reason, now I see, now I see.
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15-03-2011, 01:45 AM
RE: Oh, Church. How funny thou art.
Even if I believed in a god I would never attend a church that sent things like this to others. Thats horrible. Is this the way they show their morale standards and the reason we should believe as they do? Wow.
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