One of my friends isn't doing well...
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23-01-2013, 02:59 PM
One of my friends isn't doing well...
We've been friends with this couple since my son was born. Their daughter and my son are best friends and are 2 weeks apart. QC met her when they were both 8 months pregnant.

Anyway, her husband went in for an MRI a few months back and they found an abnormality on the brain. It turned out to be a tumor. Last week he had surgery to remove the brain tumor. The surgery was successful; however, they did a spinal tap on him today and he has staph as well as bacterial meningitis on the brain. There is a high chance of death and/or severe brain damage. He's in ICU right now.

The kicker is that his wife is pregnant with their second child which is due next month.

A sad situation all the way around. I hate this.

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23-01-2013, 03:15 PM
RE: One of my friends isn't doing well...
That is very sad. Sad

Really do hope things work out for all involved and that he's got good doctors treating him. It's got to be incredibly hard on his wife -- really hope she's getting extra support.


[Image: mrhanky.jpg]

Wind's in the east, a mist coming in
Like something is brewing and about to begin
Can't put my finger on what lies in store
but I feel what's to happen has happened before...


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23-01-2013, 03:16 PM
RE: One of my friends isn't doing well...
That sucks. It really does. I really do hope he beats the odds and pulls through without any complications.

KC, maybe now's not the time, or maybe now's the perfect time, I'll let you be the judge, but I'm curious about the effect this has on you. Is this just part of God's plan? Is this guy going to a better place (or if it's a worse place, isn't it exactly the place he deserves)? Shouldn't you just take this in stride because it's all god's will no matter what happens - god made this guy, god made his brain, god made his tumor, god chose for him to get these infections - so why should you or anyone else be sad about this, why should anyone hate this?

Isn't that tantamount to hating god?

(I am really not trying to pick on you but rather trying to get a handle on how you (et al) deal with this kind of emotional conflict, and maybe a little bit trying to use this emotional conflict to help you put your faith into a different perspective).

"Whores perform the same function as priests, but far more thoroughly." - Robert A. Heinlein
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23-01-2013, 03:22 PM
RE: One of my friends isn't doing well...
KC's Law was just invoked motherfuckers, shit is about to get real.




But seriously, that sucks to read KC.

The people closely associated with the namesake of female canines are suffering from a nondescript form of lunacy.
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23-01-2013, 03:41 PM
RE: One of my friends isn't doing well...
Yeah, she has a ton of support. Our church is doing all they can for them.

@Aseptic Skeptic
Seriously? You couldn't at least wait a day before invoking KC's Law? Kind of disrespectful, but you have the right to ask what ever you want.

Very disappointed in you right now.

But yeah, no hate for God. It is what it is. It's God's plan. It's what He's predetermined.

Likewise, questioning my emotions based on my religious belief is uncalled for at this moment as well. I feel emotions (sadness) because I'm created with emotions. Just because I know it's predetermined doesn't mean I have to like it or not feel anything from it. It just means that I accept it.

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23-01-2013, 03:47 PM
RE: One of my friends isn't doing well...
Im sorry to hear about your friend KC. Its seems that cancer is fucking everywhere, I know so many people who have either gone through it and as you know my niece is going through it.

I find it unusual though bro when people say it is pre-determined and then they are sad about it. If you really believe he is going to heaven then by rights you should be ecstatic that god has chose to save him from this "hell" that is life early.

Im sorry if that angers you.... but this is part of the frustration that none believers go through, its kinda hypocritical.

I do seriously hope he pulls through though, I wouldnt wish it upon my worst enemy

For no matter how much I use these symbols, to describe symptoms of my existence.
You are your own emphasis.
So I say nothing.

-Bemore.
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23-01-2013, 03:53 PM
RE: One of my friends isn't doing well...
What is there to understand?

What is there to be frustrated about?

Y'all are creating a false dilemma.

Just because he dies and goes to heaven doesn't mean I'm not going to miss him. It doesn't mean that I'm not grieved. It doesn't mean that I'm not sad about his wife becoming a widow. It doesn't mean that I'm not upset about his kids growing up without a father.

Like I said. I still have emotions.

Y'all are equating me believe in predestination as someone incapable of experiencing any emotion and cannot sympathize or empathize.

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23-01-2013, 03:58 PM
RE: One of my friends isn't doing well...
I dont really want to get in a massive convo about it, I was just putting my opinion and offering my condolences. Im not doubting your emotions bro as I know your a good guy.


I was just observing what I see, which appears to me and I imagine a lot of others to be quite hypocritical.

For no matter how much I use these symbols, to describe symptoms of my existence.
You are your own emphasis.
So I say nothing.

-Bemore.
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23-01-2013, 05:45 PM
RE: One of my friends isn't doing well...
I am sorry if I've offended or disappointed you.

I have no idea what KC's law is. And I gave you the option of answering or telling me now wasn't a good time, an option you always have regardless of whether I call it out, but I called it out so you would know that I recognize that you might not want to discuss this kind of stuff right now.

In any case, thank you for your answer; our behavior at the times of our greatest emotional stress is often our most honest behavior.

I get the fact that you're human, it's one of the things I like the most about you. And I get the fact that humans are emotional. What I don't get is that you're feeling these emotions rather than other possibilities, such as resigned fatalism or even relief that his ordeal is (maybe) over and he can get onto better things (I personally hope not; I really do hope he'll be OK) . I have seen these kind of emotions in Mormons at similar times of grief.

But seriously, don't answer this stuff unless you want to, and then only when you want to.

"Whores perform the same function as priests, but far more thoroughly." - Robert A. Heinlein
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23-01-2013, 06:11 PM
RE: One of my friends isn't doing well...
Having babies and very young children is seriously hard. My brother in law and his wife had their first child over Christmas so it's fresh for me. To be dealing with this on the verge of a birth and with the potential to still be dealing with it or worse when the baby arrives is a pretty horrific prospect. She's going to need a lot of support over this period: family, friends, church.

Give me your argument in the form of a published paper, and then we can start to talk.
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