Panic attacks brain ninja'd me
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15-05-2013, 04:53 PM (This post was last modified: 15-05-2013 04:59 PM by cheapthrillseaker.)
Panic attacks brain ninja'd me
So I'm going to share something that I recently realized about myself. My hope is in sharing this, someone else who is going through similar might be able to identify it and not be stuck wondering what the experience is all about and associate it to something different than what it actually is.

First off, I used to be on medications. My first time experiencing what I still go through was characterized by me as 'suddenly being in the present'. The medications where a hell on its own and acted as wool over my eyes when it came to experiencing the world around me in the present, and it shut my personality down so I wasn't really 'me'.

The experience would happen at any time, day or night. What I experienced goes as such:

In a random moment I go from doing whatever I'm doing to suddenly feeling as though I'm elsewhere. Memories of my past (mostly childhood) would come up. The biggest memory recall I had was that of being on the island of my fathers youth, surrounded by family.

The first feeling I got was that of euphoria, and then my heart would beat fast. Sadly it felt at that time like 'coming home'. I was always sad when the feeling went away.

It's been three years since I've been off the medication, and only in the past month I've been able to identify what it really was: a small panic attack.

My heart would beat fast, I'd still have that feeling of being elsewhere, but that was because a panic attack can do that to me. The euphoria might be from a rush of adrenaline; the same as that when riding a roller coaster. The small panic attack wasn't enough to make me paranoid but had enough a kick to make my instincts go "where am I?" and associate a memory to it to cope. Now, the feelings are less and less associated to a past memory and more centered in the present and what actually is going on. I attribute this self discovery to my life's changes. I'm currently doing more things than ever before; looking for a job and getting the process started to enter school. I'm less in my head than before and in the past 18 months or so started to look at the world more skeptically which has benefited me in more ways than one.

From going to attributing a sense of being in the present while not feeling like I'm the right location to realizing that it is simply a mini panic attack is leaps and bounds for my recovery. I do believe I will be able to handle these occurrences better. Not only that, but now I know that it's happening, I know this is something I want to tackle. I'm not yet 30, but know that later on in life, the mini panic attacks that happen at least once a day, if not more, need to be taken care of. I want the longest life I can give myself, and anxiety and higher stress levels can up the risk of a heart attack and high blood pressure. Those are things to take care of now so in my later years I'll be a veteran when it comes it handing it.

I hope this post helps enlighten someone. Even if it's not them who are going through it.

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15-05-2013, 09:07 PM
RE: Panic attacks brain ninja'd me
I agree that understanding something- the reason or cause, the progression, the outcome etc- would help tremendously in how something like this is handled and resolved. It would provide a base or 'map' to ground the thoughts instead of feeling out of control and driving the panic further.

I think I've felt similarly before, and oddly they were usually at times that loved ones were in distress at the hospital. I never thought about that until I was relating to your description, so it may just help, though I've never felt it as severe as you've described. Thank you!
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16-05-2013, 01:08 AM
RE: Panic attacks brain ninja'd me
tl;dr

Drinking Beverage

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16-05-2013, 07:29 AM
RE: Panic attacks brain ninja'd me
(16-05-2013 01:08 AM)DLJ Wrote:  tl;dr

Drinking Beverage

Drinking Beverage

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