Parenting with a believer rant
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14-12-2013, 01:28 AM
RE: Parenting with a believer rant
(13-12-2013 07:17 PM)Nick Danger Wrote:  
(13-12-2013 03:00 PM)nach_in Wrote:  prejudiced much?

I hope that you aren’t inferring here that dad’s observation about his daughter is necessarily salacious. As the father of four daughters and even more granddaughters, most of whom are stunningly beautiful, I can tell you that a father and/or a grandfather is allowed to be cognizant of the fact that his daughter or granddaughter has a killer figure. If you think that implies anything untoward, then the problem is yours.

BTW, if that wasn’t your inference, then, nevermind.

Whatever...like his wife says, now that he's an atheist anything goes. Drinking Beverage
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14-12-2013, 01:33 AM
RE: Parenting with a believer rant
(13-12-2013 07:29 PM)djkamilo Wrote:  
(13-12-2013 07:17 PM)Nick Danger Wrote:  I hope that you aren’t inferring here that dad’s observation about his daughter is necessarily salacious. As the father of four daughters and even more granddaughters, most of whom are stunningly beautiful, I can tell you that a father and/or a grandfather is allowed to be cognizant of the fact that his daughter or granddaughter has a killer figure. If you think that implies anything untoward, then the problem is yours.

BTW, if that wasn’t your inference, then, nevermind.

I thinks that it was what he was trying to say. He's a prick but whatever.
I was molested when I was little and believe me I find it the inferences Gordon was trying to make more repulsive than he ever will.

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14-12-2013, 07:22 AM
RE: Parenting with a believer rant
(14-12-2013 01:28 AM)Gordon Wrote:  
(13-12-2013 07:17 PM)Nick Danger Wrote:  I hope that you aren’t inferring here that dad’s observation about his daughter is necessarily salacious. As the father of four daughters and even more granddaughters, most of whom are stunningly beautiful, I can tell you that a father and/or a grandfather is allowed to be cognizant of the fact that his daughter or granddaughter has a killer figure. If you think that implies anything untoward, then the problem is yours.

BTW, if that wasn’t your inference, then, nevermind.

Whatever...like his wife says, now that he's an atheist anything goes. Drinking Beverage


Ah yes, because everybody knows that Atheists don't have any moral values. (yawn)

Absolute Certainty’s most constant companion is Wrongheadedness.
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14-12-2013, 09:24 AM
RE: Parenting with a believer rant
(13-12-2013 07:17 PM)Nick Danger Wrote:  
(13-12-2013 03:00 PM)nach_in Wrote:  prejudiced much?

I hope that you aren’t inferring here that dad’s observation about his daughter is necessarily salacious. As the father of four daughters and even more granddaughters, most of whom are stunningly beautiful, I can tell you that a father and/or a grandfather is allowed to be cognizant of the fact that his daughter or granddaughter has a killer figure. If you think that implies anything untoward, then the problem is yours.

BTW, if that wasn’t your inference, then, nevermind.

I am inferring, but from what the other dude implied. I never thought anything of that ilk from djkamilo

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14-12-2013, 11:19 AM
RE: Parenting with a believer rant
I was referring to Gordon. He's an idiot.

“The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.” ― Richard Pryor
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14-12-2013, 12:42 PM (This post was last modified: 14-12-2013 12:45 PM by LostCyborg.)
RE: Parenting with a believer rant
I'm the father of a 6 year old daughter, and if she looks anything like her mother does when she's older, I'm in for many a sleepless nights when she starts dating. Lucky for me my wife and I see pretty much eye to eye on the sex / dating stuff even though I'm an atheist and I guess I would describe my wife as a non-specific theist. She certainly isn't tied down by any specific holy book and its rules. She lives here in the real world, so as far as parenting goes we see pretty much eye to eye.

With that said, I wouldn't be too worried about identifying an age your daughter will be "allowed" to date. I would focus more on building her self esteem, sense of self, and above all what is acceptable and not acceptable ways for her to be treated by others... especially men/boys. I think the best way to do this is by setting a good example on how you treat and relate to her as a father, as well as how she sees you treat your wife (and also how you allow your wife to treat you). My goal is for my daughter to not accept disrespectful or abusive behavior from other people. What I don't want is for her to get into a relationship at any age, and allow people to treat her with disrespect, emotional abuse, manipulation, or any of those "tactics" that come into play when dating. That goes for those non-sexual relations too. I might get more hyper-focused on the few relationships/friendships she has with other boys at this age (with perhaps the wrong assumption she is heterosexual), but I think it is important even now for her to learn how to set boundaries with other people.

Dating and sex is a scary thing for any parent to think about, because it is a big step when growing up. I don't think there is a whole lot we can do that is effective that can control when it happens. I think the important thing is for them to have the tools, sense of self, and confidence to take that step when they feel they are ready and for them to do it on their own terms.

P.S. I also have a 15 year old son, and prejudice or not, parenting a daughter is from my experience much scarier than parenting a son, in almost every aspect!
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14-12-2013, 02:23 PM
RE: Parenting with a believer rant
Thanks for your feedback cyborg. I can absolutely relate. My wife was very hot during her high school years. She's had three babies and has had to battle with her weight but will resume going to the gym next month.

Having said that my daughter has a very strong personality just like her mom. Although she's very caring I can safely predict she won't let men abuse her although you never know. I am more concerned with developing her emotional maturity for dealing with almost inevitable heart break and other issues she might face once she grows up.

Thankfully my wife is somewhat like yours, somewhat theistic, hasn't read all the bible, but somewhat relates to the Christian god in some pascal wager sense.


Then there's very uncomfortable issues to deal with like masturbation which is a little harder to approach in my opinion than boys. Having a 15 year old how do you deal with that?

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14-12-2013, 02:31 PM
RE: Parenting with a believer rant
(14-12-2013 11:19 AM)djkamilo Wrote:  I was referring to Gordon. He's an idiot.

I gathered as much.

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15-12-2013, 01:18 AM (This post was last modified: 15-12-2013 01:27 AM by Gordon.)
RE: Parenting with a believer rant
(14-12-2013 11:19 AM)djkamilo Wrote:  I was referring to Gordon. He's an idiot.

You've been looking at your five-year-old and you think she's going to have a "killer body" when she's older.

You think she should be able to have sex at thirteen like your wife did.

You think dating shouldn't be related to age but to "maturity."

Now, you want to broach the subject of her masturbating.

You can call me any stupid names you want to, but I dare you to print out what you wrote in here and show it to the marriage counselor your planning to go to. I dare you.
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15-12-2013, 01:24 AM
RE: Parenting with a believer rant
(14-12-2013 07:22 AM)Nick Danger Wrote:  Ah yes, because everybody knows that Atheists don't have any moral values. (yawn)

An atheist might have moral values...but they don't have to have moral values.
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