Perhaps Jesus hasn't returned yet because...
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26-03-2013, 05:03 PM
Perhaps Jesus hasn't returned yet because...
...crucifixions are his kryptonite and Christians are wearing them around their necks like they're trying to ward off vampires. If Jesus was a god, and he was killed by a crucifix, clearly they are his only weakness. All super heroes have weaknesses. So Jesus is up in heaven, trying to come back to Earth, but the entire Christian community is keeping him at bay with their powerful symbols. Christians are Earth's protectors, keeping Armageddon at bay for the sake of all mankind.



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"Ain't got no last words to say, yellow streak right up my spine. The gun in my mouth was real and the taste blew my mind."

"We see you cry. We turn your head. Then we slap your face. We see you try. We see you fail. Some things never change."
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26-03-2013, 05:14 PM
RE: Perhaps Jesus hasn't returned yet because...
[Image: omg_eagle1.gif]

Behold the power of the force!
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27-03-2013, 03:29 AM
RE: Perhaps Jesus hasn't returned yet because...
"A lot of Christians wear crosses around their necks. You think when Jesus comes back he ever wants to see a fucking cross? It's like going up to Jackie Onassis wearing a rifle pendant.”~Bill Hicks

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27-03-2013, 05:42 PM
RE: Perhaps Jesus hasn't returned yet because...
This whole thread is made of win. Big Grin

Through profound pain comes profound knowledge.
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27-03-2013, 06:39 PM
RE: Perhaps Jesus hasn't returned yet because...
What kind of shitty hard tetris game is that?
Clearly the second from the bottom line is a complete line and so should have blinked and went away by now.

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